Feel emotionally numb

[jemmaax]

Does anyone sometimes feel like emotionally numb? I feel constant anxiety but I'm not feeling so anxious (or sometimes when I am anxious as well.) I feel sadness, trapped, emotionally numb... Is this just the anxiety or depression as well? It's definitely understandable if it is depression as well, anxiety takes it out of you.

[Lee Grant Irons]

Hi jemmaax,

These things tend to go together and are not necessarily abnormal. Normal depression can be a normal response to "life happening," especially when you do not feel well mentally, emotionally, or physically. I had anxiety caused by a mistreated thyroid condition and a missed (by the doctors) calcium deficiency ( I had a complex cascading medical condition). I was sure I was going to die. At the same time, I had depression as a result of not feeling well and my family and friends not knowing what to do with me. I guess I could describe this as emotionally numb. My son, a psychology major and premed at school, tells me that it is due to a sense of loss of locus of internal and locus of external control. We feel we don;t have any control over anything anymore, and thus feel disconnected. I felt as though who I had been was completely gone, never to return.

Good news is that things got better once I figured out what was wrong with me medically. I had to find a doctor who was willing to consult with me and rubber stamp what I wanted to do. Once my doctor had run out of ideas, I had to figure it out myself and then tell the doctor what tests I wanted to do and what treatments I wanted to try. The doctor just ensured that risks were minimized while we did this. As a result, the doctor learned a lot and has used the knowledge to help other people with similar conditions to mine. She told me I should go to medical school. Unfortunately, timing is bad on that front. LOL

Hang in there! Life can get better if you don't give up on yourself.

[mykids12]

Hi jemmaax, These things tend to go together and are not necessarily abnormal. Normal depression can be a normal response to "life happening," especially when you do not feel well mentally, emotionally, or physically. I had anxiety caused by a mistreated thyroid condition and a missed (by the doctors) calcium deficiency ( I had a complex cascading medical condition). I was sure I was going to die. At the same time, I had depression as a result of not feeling well and my family and friends not knowing what to do with me. I guess I could describe this as emotionally numb. My son, a psychology major and premed at school, tells me that it is due to a sense of loss of locus of internal and locus of external control. We feel we don;t have any control over anything anymore, and thus feel disconnected. I felt as though who I had been was completely gone, never to return. Good news is that things got better once I figured out what was wrong with me medically. I had to find a doctor who was willing to consult with me and rubber stamp what I wanted to do. Once my doctor had run out of ideas, I had to figure it out myself and then tell the doctor what tests I wanted to do and what treatments I wanted to try. The doctor just ensured that risks were minimized while we did this. As a result, the doctor learned a lot and has used the knowledge to help other people with similar conditions to mine. She told me I should go to medical school. Unfortunately, timing is bad on that front. LOL Hang in there! Life can get better if you don't give up on yourself.

What kinds of symptoms did you have before you had your thyroid and calcium fixed?

[Lee Grant Irons]

What kinds of symptoms did you have before you had your thyroid and calcium fixed?

Wow! You name it! I have alwasy had heart palpitations from as young as I can remember. During my 40th year on the Earth, I started getting strange nerve and muscle twinges. I would urinate and the bottom of my right foot would tingle. My eyelids started twitching. This went on for months. Then over the course of five days, the anxiety came on with that feeling that something really bad is about to happen that you can't stop, I starting feeling like I couldn't get a full breath of air, I felt a tightening in my throat, and then the muscle pain started in my neck shoulders and left arm. Checked for heart attack, but negative. Then the temporary mental break down for the next couple of weeks, with insomnia. After those two weeks, a doctor discovered that I had a TSH over 100 and immediately started me on T4. Things went downhill from there over the next four months, eventually leading to being disabled from work. Irritable bowel syndrome set in (constant pain, regardless of what I ate), my gall bladder stopped working (with no stones... it just stopped working), the pain in my shoulders, back, and left arm was constantly present along with pain in the fingers except for when I first awoke in the morning, TMJ pain started, I was in constant fatigue, and I absolutely knew I had ALS and was going to die within the next couple of years. almost 18 months later, I did not die or lose ability to move, so ALS was negative. But the Irritable Bowel, muscle pain, anxiety, and depression continued. I stopped sweating regardless of the amount of exertion, and my body temperature dropped by 1.5 degrees on average. My blood pressure went up from 115 over 70 to as high as 135 over 90, and my heart rate dropped to below 50 when resting, and I am not a runner. It was in this time period that Mayo Clinic discovered I had a dilated aorta and though that I might have Marfan Syndrome. Great! Something else to be anxious about! Then the muscle cramps in my feet and legs started, along with migraines. However, I was really ticked off by that point that doctors could not figure out what was happening to me. I had already been through a number of doctors. I finally found one that would work with me and make a plan. I had to get smart about health conditions and treatments, because my new doctor ran out of ideas within a few months, but was willing to read anything I brought in and try new tests and treatments. It took awhile, but we eventually figured out that the T4 thyroide medcine made me sicker because of a genetic stress condition I have which cause T4 to be converted by the body into something the body can't use, thus the reason I initially got sicker. I went on T3 medicine, and my irritable bowel and muscle pain symptoms cleared up within a week. Also during this time is when I discovered that I had a high calcitonin in my blood, a low vitamin D-25OH, a low PTH, and a low calcium. Calcitonin should not be in the blood unless calcium is too high. My low PTH and low Vit D-25OH did not enable my bones and intestines to keep up with the rate that Calcitonin was pushing calcium out through my kidneys. So I started taking calcium magnesium supplement. My migraines and my heart palpitations went away. My dilated aorta has also started shrinking. My blood pressure has returned to normal and my heart rate is over 60 when resting.

That is the summary without all of the blow-by-blow details. LOL

[mykids12]

Wow! You name it! I have alwasy had heart palpitations from as young as I can remember. During my 40th year on the Earth, I started getting strange nerve and muscle twinges. I would urinate and the bottom of my right foot would tingle. My eyelids started twitching. This went on for months. Then over the course of five days, the anxiety came on with that feeling that something really bad is about to happen that you can't stop, I starting feeling like I couldn't get a full breath of air, I felt a tightening in my throat, and then the muscle pain started in my neck shoulders and left arm. Checked for heart attack, but negative. Then the temporary mental break down for the next couple of weeks, with insomnia. After those two weeks, a doctor discovered that I had a TSH over 100 and immediately started me on T4. Things went downhill from there over the next four months, eventually leading to being disabled from work. Irritable bowel syndrome set in (constant pain, regardless of what I ate), my gall bladder stopped working (with no stones... it just stopped working), the pain in my shoulders, back, and left arm was constantly present along with pain in the fingers except for when I first awoke in the morning, TMJ pain started, I was in constant fatigue, and I absolutely knew I had ALS and was going to die within the next couple of years. almost 18 months later, I did not die or lose ability to move, so ALS was negative. But the Irritable Bowel, muscle pain, anxiety, and depression continued. I stopped sweating regardless of the amount of exertion, and my body temperature dropped by 1.5 degrees on average. My blood pressure went up from 115 over 70 to as high as 135 over 90, and my heart rate dropped to below 50 when resting, and I am not a runner. It was in this time period that Mayo Clinic discovered I had a dilated aorta and though that I might have Marfan Syndrome. Great! Something else to be anxious about! Then the muscle cramps in my feet and legs started, along with migraines. However, I was really ticked off by that point that doctors could not figure out what was happening to me. I had already been through a number of doctors. I finally found one that would work with me and make a plan. I had to get smart about health conditions and treatments, because my new doctor ran out of ideas within a few months, but was willing to read anything I brought in and try new tests and treatments. It took awhile, but we eventually figured out that the T4 thyroide medcine made me sicker because of a genetic stress condition I have which cause T4 to be converted by the body into something the body can't use, thus the reason I initially got sicker. I went on T3 medicine, and my irritable bowel and muscle pain symptoms cleared up within a week. Also during this time is when I discovered that I had a high calcitonin in my blood, a low vitamin D-25OH, a low PTH, and a low calcium. Calcitonin should not be in the blood unless calcium is too high. My low PTH and low Vit D-25OH did not enable my bones and intestines to keep up with the rate that Calcitonin was pushing calcium out through my kidneys. So I started taking calcium magnesium supplement. My migraines and my heart palpitations went away. My dilated aorta has also started shrinking. My blood pressure has returned to normal and my heart rate is over 60 when resting. That is the summary without all of the blow-by-blow details. LOL

I'm convinced I have scleroderma because I have muscle and joint pain and a scratchy throat that makes me cough. Even though I go to bed with cold like symptoms I cough the next day because my throat is so dry. Oh and my kidneys are failing because I have mid to lower back pain. Plus I get shortness of breath sometimes, not sure if it's from anxiety or what. I hate google. Not saying I don't have his but google put it in my head that I do. This sucks really.

[Lee Grant Irons]

I'm convinced I have scleroderma because I have muscle and joint pain and a scratchy throat that makes me cough. Even though I go to bed with cold like symptoms I cough the next day because my throat is so dry. Oh and my kidneys are failing because I have mid to lower back pain. Plus I get shortness of breath sometimes, not sure if it's from anxiety or what. I hate google. Not saying I don't have his but google put it in my head that I do. This sucks really.

I went through a stage of thinking I had scleroderma. I have this crease on my forehead between my brows that I was sure was an indicator. I can also remember having lower back pain, though I thought it was associated with Marfan Syndrome at the time. LOL It is really healthy to laugh at ourselves sometimes. Google is a blessing and curse! LOL

Scleroderma is an autoimmune condition. You can get some antibody tests to check for general autoimmune conditions. Also, kidney failure can also be checked by simple blood test. I have had so many blood tests, I could probably give complete blood replacement transfusions to 10 people with what has been taken from me. However, I needed to go through it to get where I am today. In hindsight, I was able to use all of those tests to look for trends and eventually figure out what was going on. I do not judge anyone for getting as much stuff tested as they can afford, have insurance cover, and get a doctor to agree. LOL

[mykids12]

The thought of scleroderma scares me so much. I'm literally sick over it. Bad thing is I have no insurance but I'm going to have to go get all the tests done anyway. I'm iust a mess right now :(

[butterflybandage]

Oh, definitely! Especially if you are on some type of medication. But general anxiety and depression can cause that. I get that a lot when my anxiety is acting up (or even when I feel calm but it has acted up within the past week or so). It's perfectly normal, yet very annoying, I know. You should definitely talk to your doctor about this, they'll find something that helps, I promise. Best of wishes! xx