Is it normal

[worriedmummy85]

I have spent the night in A&E with my daughter who was in extreme pain

Now on the way there I felt a panic attack coming on tried to keep it together but. Felt like I was having a heart attack I knew I was in the best place but for some reason when I have a panic attack I just want to be alone I don't want anyone touching me etc

Is this normal to just want to go and hide?

[tailspin]

Hi, I can really relate to this. One of the worst things for me about about an absolute killer panic attack is that it feels like there is no comfort to be found anywhere or from anyone. Not from a hospital, not from a loved one. Absolutely no relief is possible. And I can't stand having anyone around me. It really does feel like descending into a very private hell. I'm talking here about those catastrophic panic attacks where you literally feel like you are about to die. Not the type that are over in 10 minutes, but those absolute doozies, where you actually kind of want to die just so it will be over, yet, on the other hand, paradoxically, you are also terrified of dying.

In that situation I don't even want my husband around me (even though he is usually the best person in the world at comforting me). And the idea of going to a hospital when I feel like that - or even of calling an ambulance and having to inteface with another human being - feels absolutely beyond the realms of possibility.

I feel too ill to get help. If that makes any sense. And that's why I'm so scared of dying in that situation because I am not in a position to call for help. One time my husband actually wanted to take me to the ER because I was literally down on my hands and knees kind of gasping for air, but when he suggested that he drive me to the ER I just looked at him incomprehensibly. There is NO WAY in that situation that I could get in a car to get to a hospital. I can't even describe the feeling......It is completely and utterly paralyzing and so terrifying that I literally can't put it into words.

So even though, as you say, a hospital might be the best place for you, the idea of getting to a hospital - and then of actually being in a hospital with all those bright lights and other people and having to actually speak to somebody - it's just all utterly impossible in that moment. The only thing I can do in that moment is withdraw into myself and white-knuckle it. I literally just retreat from everyone and just hold on for dear life until the worst of it is over. It is the worst thing ever!!!!!!!

So I can totally relate about wanting to hide in that situation. I can imagine that it must have been really difficult for you feeling like y ou had to be strong for your daughter while, all the time, dying inside. Was your husband there with you? How are you feeling now? Hopefully your daughter is doing better too!

[worriedmummy85]

I honestly thought u had got over the chest pain thing since I knew what it was but it started hurting in a different place this tends to happen when I get exhausted I have been up mega early for the past 3 days my daughter doesn't nap and hasn't done since she was 1 year old she is literally ion the go from 6:30 ish to 7:30 at night it does just run me down and my partner is very reluctant to give up any lie ins to give me a rest

So today was my lie in my little girl comes bursting in the bedroom at 7am and he just sits on the bed like nothing's wrong

To be honest I am that fed up with being tired and unwell I am totally hanging on by a string I am glad I am at my CBT today

[missechelon]

First I hope your daughter is ok it's worrying at the best of times big hugs to her xxxx

And I hate anyone seeing me have an attack I feel I can calm myself down better with nobody watching or trying to calm me down it makes me worse