Please please somebody help me, not had this in 12 years

[bedhead]

Hi

Please can somebody help me i'm currently suffering from anxiety so bad I'm convinced i'll not get better. I can't sleep at night, I've got valium but it isn't touching the anxiety, about an hour after I take it I feel jumpy and shaking again. I can't stop moving my legs and I feel like there's a lead weight in my stomach, I can't leave the house, my mum has to be around at all times because I don't want to be alone. I've been to the emergency doctor who was really nice, told me to come off fluoxetine immediately as she thinks i'm having a rebound reaction to it (just 10 days into taking it after a six month break) told me to take 5mg valium but I'm scared i'll stop breathing of won't be able to react properly on it so i'm taking half. The desperation I feel is absolutely indescribable and i'm so tired, so desperate to relax. I keep contemplating going to the accident and emergency department to beg them to help me. Can anyone share a similar situation with me? How can I cope?

Mel

[RabidBadger]

Hi Mel

I was exactly the same as you are a year ago.

All these things that you are feeling are reactions to your anxiety and they won't hurt you.

If you go to the emergency department, you won't believe what they tell you anyway. It is not the physical effects that you need to tackle, it's the constant need to be reassured about the state of your health.

I know how hard it is but you have to start to believe that anxiety can do all these things to you but they are temporary. If you visit my website below, you'll see a link entitled "what are these symptoms" - you may find the information there reassuring.

Best of luck

Chris

[bedhead]

Hi Chris

Thank you so much for replying to my post, I'm currently finding it very difficult getting out of bed and am isolating myself from my friends and family. The christmas period has been an absolute nightmare for me and my mum is having to bring me food to make sure I eat. Its horrendously embarrassing for me to be like this. I feel a complete faliure and am so desperately upset that i'm worrying my whole family.

I think my doctor is losing his patience with me as i am refusing to take any other antidepressants. He's insistent about citalopram and i've read that it has various side effects and to not take it without consulting your doctor if you have any heart rhythm disorders. I have AVNRT (an accessory pathway in my heart that conducts the rhythm very rapidly) and unfortunately my whole anxiety episode has now centered around my heart condition. I'm on beta blockers to control this arrhythmia and my cardiologist has told me that I won't suddenly die but i'm trawling the internet constantly for the minute chance that it may happen.

Is there any way I can get through this without antidepressants? I desperately want to overcome it without them, they will make my fears of side effects worse.

Mel

[Job_314]

Hey Mel, by the topic of your title, have you dealt with anxiety in the past? ...did you previously overcome anxiety using anti-depressants?

I've just recently got my life on track, and the anti-depressants helped me a ton. Perhaps you should seek out a therapist to talk to irregularly? Maybe he or she can give some insight on possible medications. But of course the main idea of seeing a therapist would be to discuss what's causing your anxiety to talk you through it.

Anti-depressants are one of the most mass produced medications, and I know exactly what it's like to panic about it, but again, perhaps speaking to someone will give you some reassurance and guidance in the right direction.

[RabidBadger]

Hi Mel

The first thing you can do is get out of the habit of looking up health conditions on line. I can't stress how important it is to your recovery that you STOP IT NOW. You are only scaring yourself and making yoursefl feel less able to be physically active.

Trust what your doctor says and speak to him about anti-depressants. I take one called escitalopram, which is ver similar to citalopram but with fewer side-effects.

Once you get into the habit of feeling ill, it is very hard to get out of it. Stop feeling your pulse, stop thinking about your breathing and STOP LOOKING ON THE INTERNET.

I know what it's like to feel like you can't get out of bed, I've been there. The truth is you can. Set yourself a couple of easy targets every day like washing the pots or walking to the end of the garden. Make yourself stick to them, no matter how scary it is. Fear can't hurt you and you don't need to avoid it.

Trust me, you can get better. I am living proof.

Good luck

Chris

[bedhead]

Hi Chris

Having just been to the doctors he has referred me for psychiatric evaluation and has even suggested due to the extremety of my anxiety that if I am so scared of taking more meds then I could be admitted to hospital where i could be monitored etc whilst i take them. Of course now i've latched onto the fact that i'm thinking they want to commit me and i'm actually going insane. Could I actually become unhinged by all this and end up institutionalised for life? I'm hoping this may be a common fear with anxiety sufferers as now i'm thinking "what if i start to hear voices" or have a "psychotic episode". I'm so sorry about the constant questions, i'm just trying to get a grip on myself.

Mel

[RabidBadger]

Hi Mel

When I first started taking my medication, I was terrified of it. Every time I swallowed a pill it was as if I was taking a cyanide capsule - I was sure they were going to harm me in some way. Now I take them without even thinking about it so I know it gets easier.

The thought of having to go into hospital is indeed worrying but the days when they used to lock people up in asylums are long-gone. You will only be considered for this dractic action if they think it is in your best medical interest and I'm pretty sure the final decision will be yours.

Many people (myself included) worry that anxiety is going to lead to some kind of psychosis or schizophrenia but this doesn't happen. I have had anxiety problems for nine years now and I am no more likely to become psychotic now than I was when it all began. I'm sure you are used to your mind coming up with "what if this" and "what if that" scenarios, this is just part of the anxiety and the "what if I start to hear voices" worry is just another example. The fact is, in the majority of cases, if you are really going mad, other people notice it a long time before you do because you don't see it as "mad".

Best of luck

Chris

[bedhead]

Thanks Chris

You are indeed a very rational person and I can't thank you enough for discussing these things with me and helping me to rationalise things in my own mind.

Best wishes

Mel

[RabidBadger]

Hi Mel

You should see me when I'm panicking. I'm not too rational then :)

Take care

Chris

[robcacc2008]

hey mel,

i was in a similar situation a few years ago, i knew i had a lot going in my life, and had been having anxiety attacks that i never had before.

I refused to take medication because I just don't trust the idea having to rely on something external. For me any way.

What I do is to say "stop!" to intervene the onset of anxiety best to say this quitely to yourself if in public,
take deep breaths, then just ask yourself what is the very worst that could happen.

after a while the very thing you imagine could happen just doesn't.

oh! and take regular exercise, I'm a lazy b*****rd and I can tell you do some thing physically really helped.

Rob.

[conciliary]

Chris-

You made a statement that I thought you were talking directly to me about. I have been going down this anxiety road again the past couple weeks and just posted a topic looking for support as well, and your “STOP LOOKING AT THE INTERNET” comment is exactly what I keep doing as well. I know I shouldn’t, and I have told myself the same thing but I keep doing it. Every time I get a new “symptom” I look it up, and it always points to something awful, and feeling my pulse is my latest obsession.

Mel-

I hope you are feeling better. When my anxiety was at its worst it also had me to the point where I felt very sick to leave the house, I lost my appetite and just felt like I would never return to the person I was before. I got out of it through relaxation/breathing exercises, talking with a therapist, and this site. I have recently been going though the anxiety issues again, and it is amazing how quickly things can seem to return to feeling like I will never get better, like you’re stuck in a hole you cant climb out of. Don’t give up, and try to keep a positive outlook as hard as it may sound. I know I sound like a hypocrite, but its advice that I should listen too as well. I know it is very difficult to do since the results are instantaneous, but hopefully we can both do it together.

Thanks

[bedhead]

Hi Rob

I hate to say it but you are right about the exercise thing, my doc goes on about it, my parents, my boyfriend. I'm the same, very lazy but on the rare occasions in the past that I have exercised i've felt so much better for it, i sometimes worry that exerting myself will be detrimental to my heart condition but there's tons of people out there doing allsorts with much worse conditions than mine. Its so damn hard getting through this anxiety stuff and although there are lots of us on the net I haven't met anyone in person that's had chronic anxiety. My god we'd have alot to talk about! lol I know i'll never be totally cured of it, just leading a normal (ish) life is enough for me and as i've got through this before then I know i'll get through it again.

Conciliary

Although this is an absolute B*TCH of an illness it is something that you should feel really proud of being able to control and don't see set backs as faliure, I personally think mental health issues are some of the worst issues you can have and sufferers trying for quality of life are the bravest people there are because when things are really bad, everything you do takes an enormous amount of effort and perseverence. Thank god the medical world has come round to the idea that this is a real illness and although it can't be seen, it does't make it any less destructive. We don't ask to feel this way but we deal with it the best we can.