My Therapist Wants Me On Pills

[sweetypie]

I have a student therapist and she is discussing with her supervisor the possibility of putting me on pills.

It scares me so much. A part of me wants to be on them because I am so tired of suffering! But I also have a phobia of taking pills because I'm scared of becoming addicted and/or having horrible side effects. I also started crying because I got scared she was putting me on pills because she thought I was hopeless or something.

Can you possibly tell me how some of you got over this fear? And maybe some positive stories about how taking these pills changed your life? That would be nice.

[becki]

Hi know you're not alone in your fear!! What I did was decide how I wanted to live my life. I didn't want to be scared to do everyday things. I wanted to be happy going on errands alone. I wanted to eat out without rushing. I wanted to be able to volunteer at my daughter's school. I had a hard time deciding I put off meds for a whirl but finally I said enough is enough and if taking a pills helps me feel less anxious I'm taking it! Been almost a year now and I'm so happy with my decision.

[tailspin]

Hi sweetypie, I put off taking medication for a long time too. I had all the same fears you do so I really understand where you are coming from. I'm sure a lot of people here do.

Eventually I felt so bad that I was prepared to try pretty much anything. I can honestly say that the pills - anti-depressants - have helped me. Also, the side effects were all manageable for me and I did not have any kind of horror story experience (which I was very worried about). I do think it's worth trying medication under a psychiatrist's supervision when things get really bad. Yes, some people find the initial side effects difficult, but generally they settle down quickly and in a lot of cases people really do feel a benefit from anti-depressants. Also, you can minimize the risk of side effects by starting out on a very small dose and gradually increasing.

Wishing you the best!

[Ponder]

"Can you possibly tell me how some of you got over this fear? And maybe some positive stories about how taking these pills changed your life? That would be nice. "

Hi sweetypie ... I struggled for some time after my therapist wanted me to consider medication. Unless there is some kind of Court Order in place, no one can Make anyone take medication but Oneself. It's totally your choice and I think that's where many people fail to understand the power of intention. I relaxed on my anti-med attitude for very similar reasons as becki says. I would add for me, that age and inactivity has made my once active lifestyle hard to maintain. That was my only coping mechanism, thus the reality of what I was seeing and not being able to deal with it, drove me into such depths that in one word sums up, as devastating.

I was simply exhausted and in emotionalizes state of despair if such a thing is possible. I really had nothing to loose and given I was still breathing, that was fact enough I had an once still within me that wanted to try.

It was not easy ... I had to wait at least a month to 6 weeks before I could gauge the effect. Some Medicines did not work and actually made me feel worse. I went off them to discover that such was a whole process in its own and resultant side effects made me question even bothering to keep trying ... Put off completely by the horror stories of others I convinced myself I could just do it on my own back ... but eventually I slumped back into a pit to where the tragedy just kept repeating itself and was left with that same once that before led me to meds. This time I learned more about the process of medication and mental illness and played ball with my therapist, doctor, wife and all involved.

I really don't have a "happy" story to tell, but I can say there is hope in finding the right meds if one is willing to try and also if one can accept weather it's right for them. I only made gains with medicine when I took responsibility for owning the decision to take them in the first place. Therapists are like guides as to doctors in some respect ... ultimately it is us that makes ourselves better. Until I discovered that ... I never really gave the meds a try.

Next ... after making a decision for oneself comes understanding what role medicine plays. That's where I am up too ... Evaluating both the side effect and or Gains. imo ... I don't believe medicine it the be and all ... it's a mistake to pop a pill and think that's going to make my social outings fly by ... for me it is at any rate. Find your reason why you wish to medicate ... Mine is to function in a world I do not like, however because I have plans to change this outlook and or want to get better ... I do my best to look towards some kind of light. I guess I am a fighter and still making an effort despite popping pills ...

Forgive me sweetypie ... I'm loosing my thoughts here ... There is no such thing as a quick fix. Educating oneself on the lingo of brands, doses, mixes, paraphernalia and so on is not the learning I mean ... I have come to see that medicine can help some people in their time of need to whence they may later come off them all the more better for having used them as such ... then I think some people require them as its the only chemical balance that give them any sanity for however long it be. I am thankful that although I get tired with one of mine, that I am able to sleep and do the things that need doing ... I am able to focus on some positive things and accept my mental instability to a point that allows me to live life and see the light. Often this light in quite literately all it is ... just sun light.

Meds are helping me, it's taking a lot of time and effort ... It has to be your choice, and not just dome doc, or forum fling. Best I can say for myself...it's really a continual assessment with me ... I don't rely just on them ... they tend not to work then. Who knows ... maybe others might of been OK, had I had the right attitude. Taking them on time, and what you eat and what you do ... it much much more important than the old, ,,, this Vs that, having this much vs mixing with that ... once you fall into that state of mind ... they medicine can quickly loose its effect ... then you have others talking about how they feel after drinking alcohol and smoking weed ... kind of shows a how willing one is to get well or not....

When your ready ... own the decision and make it work! You have the power ... you always have ... we all do ... Yes Meds can work. Read up on the one you "Trail" ... take at the same time of day, when you find that time that works for you ... find out about what you can eat and drink ... how much sun and fresh air you get ... work on Owning the decision and I think you will be surprised as the effect of just how empowering that alone can be ... the act to make a small step that you know you've finally made yourself ...

Best of luck whatever way you go.
It's easy to say it all within us ... be non the less ... I find that a relief to know.

[Perses]

I've been on clonazepam and sertraline for 18 years. They're great. No side effects. I guess I've been very lucky.

And, by the way, these drugs are not cure alls. They help you manage your anxiety.

I don't drink alcohol, nor do I smoke, nor have I ever done drugs. I'm not the kind of person to self-medicate. In fact, I think taking pills is a safer bet because you are under the supervision of a doctor. Frankly, I consider my pills about the same way I look at my morning cup of coffee or my vitamins. That's a bit blasé. I realize.

Now, I was also never that concerned about taking pills because I saw the miracle that lithium was for my bipolar sister. I think she would have been dead by now had she not been correctly diagnosed about 25 years ago.

Really, we all have to take pills for some ailment eventually.

Start yourself on a small dose. See how it goes.

[Dahila]

I take the meds to have kind of normal life. It is necessary in my situation. I am scared of every new medication too. I tried many of the pills which made me even worse. As others said meds help you to live with anxiety and manage it. You still are going to have bad days and good days, I hope there will be more good days for you than bad ones. I stopped smoking, which gave me some relieve, then drinking and the only sin I do is to buy something nice for myself (saved money on ciggies)/
I think you should listen the therapist and give it a try. If you do not feel ok taking them, it is your choice to stop:)) Good luck :)

[Ponder]

Hi Dahila, hope all is well. Hi Perses ... Glad to hear the setraline has been working for you. (so many name that are the same as others ... hard to keep up with it all) .... anyways ... prime example for me that they can work for others ... unfortunately that was the one I struggled with and had trouble with coming off. (only because I tried to stop too suddenly) Good advice on starting small ... I had one doctor start me on too much, said it was a small dose, but my body struggled. None the less ... really glad to hear it working for someone else.

I'm actually taking something called Quinapine ... I think it's used to treat schizophrenia, however in small doses it can assist with extreme anxiety. My anxiety was leading my into borderline Paranoia about to tip me over the edge. Really glad I have found something that finally works. Well so far so good.

Kudos on giving up smoking Dahila. I have lost count ... about 10 year ago I gave up. I do have the odd drink - but like once every 12 weeks and can't have too much because I get too sick - I kind of messed up my liver and kidneys, they are still ok, but my body lets me know. All the same, I have to be in good spirits and then I can have like maybe 2 beers max ... thing is ... meds and beer don't really go teather, but then again in small doses I will ride the crutch from time to time :)

I find it hard to understand people who drink "regularly" on meds ... does not make sense to me. I have known a few people in my time doing it, however they are pretty sick, both mentally and physically.

[Dahila]

Hi Ponder. I am happy to hear that there is something you can take. I am on Gabapentin which is used in epilepsy but in much bigger doses. In small doses works with anxiety. I do not see any side effect except a good appetite which probably kills me :) I can not drink, my max is a small dose of good gin and tonic and some lime, once in a few months and maybe a beer from time to time. It has to be between the meds.
"You said;
"I find it hard to understand people who drink "regularly" on meds ... does not make sense to me. I have known a few people in my time doing it, however they are pretty sick, both mentally and physically." my partner. He does it and yesterday I thought he is going to kill me. I need to run. It is the meds and alcohol, the aggression. I have never seen something like that, he is a sweet man otherwise. I am not really well after awful night and thinking what to do. I do not have many option. Acutally zero option :)

[Ponder]

I thought I was a sweet man between my dosing up on such poisons and more Dahila. I'm thankful my family stuck with me, through that ordeal. From time to time, my wife would give me two options & eventually it led to a one time deal, and I could see I was about to lose my family if I did not stop. I am very sorry to hear about this situation and hope that if it carries on, that perhaps you could give your partner two options from time to time and make it a one time deal, if it continues on. Forgive me for speaking out like so ... and I do understand how such abuse can unfold and feel for all involved. I'm not sure what the culture is where you live, however I could care less about the so called doctrine, rules, or societal expectation to act ... sometimes we have to make our own rules in order to find the space in which to live in peace. Hell ... if he is half the man you say he is, then he should respect the like wise ultimatum I was given from time to time. I guess ultimatum is the right word, as in war sometimes it's best to make terms, rather than live in unnecessary hell. Taking a stand is not easy, but it's better than just cut and run. Hmmmm ... easy for me to say, now our ordeal is over ... Leaving is different to running is all. You make the terms for your own life not him. Srry if I say too much ... you have my deepest sympathies in regards to such a mess.

Again ... I feel on such a topic for both sides of the coin. I do so hope that this finds you better today, this evening of morning.
__________________________________________________ _____________

No disrespect intended Sweetypie for the off topics here.

Hoping you are OK sweetypie and that you got a little something for the replies here. Be well.

[Dahila]

Thank you Ponder. It is not cultural thing in my situation,it is financial. :) I think I gave enough ultimatum already. I know that he is hurting inside a lot, but so am I. I divorced my husband of 15 years due the inability of raising children with bipolar father who refused any treatment. Then after seeing them to adulthood I got together with the sweetest man, who change into beast. A lot bad things happened to him in the last 5 years. Operation, after operation, still he has another one soon. If I leave he is going to go down, if I do not I risk my own health and recovering from awful GAD. You are right about two sides of coins. I am inpatient, and too temperamental. I am getting older and I need some peace to deal with everyday problems, at least at home. Thank you for answering

I am sorry Sweetype for highjacking your topic, Are you going to forgive me? No bad intention on my side. Just bad day:)