Sajuuk
10-08-2013, 01:07 AM
Hello dear members,
I've joined this forums simply because I can't take it anymore. I am feeling bad almost all the time. I am uncertain whether it's just anxiety/panic attacks, or something more.
Throughout the day, I am feeling dissociated. I am feeling as if it's not actually me doing the talking, walking, and all interactions, but some automated part of me, and I, the conscious part, hover somewhere behind, ready to leave at any moment. Everything seems strange and unnatural. I know this might be derealization, but I am afraid I'm losing my sanity...However, this has been going on just for a few days, 4 or 5, and not more.
Before all this, I've been to the ER, I thought my heart stopped beating. I felt as if I were about to faint (I've NEVER fainted in my entire life), my fists started clenching, jaws shut, then my fingers froze in an open palm position, and my lips contracted, and I couln't control them in any way. That happened at the ER and lasted for a minute at most. Hearing was well, and so was vision, so it was not a stroke, thankfully.
Throughout the day, I feel like my vision is blurring sometimes, my ears become plugged, and I feel some kind of pressure inside my cranium, then again, the fainting feeling kicks in, but I never actually faint. My hands go cold because I become agitated, sometimes I feel like I can't feel my heart beating, other times I feel it racing, it's weird, but I fear something more serious. Yesterday night I could feel some sort of sensory rush, like an electric jolt through all my teeth, and then I felt like fainting. An hour later, my heart was pounding so hard, I could feel my pulse in my jaw, and if I left my jaw free, the teeth would touch when the heart pulsed, so heavy was it beating.
I don't know what's happening to me. My bloodwork was fine, normal magnesium and calcium levels, everything was ok. My organs are fine (ecography), my thyroid is perfectly fine. EKGs and oxygen levels in the blood said that my heart was fine too, even when I was at the ER.
Even now, I feel numb, derealized. I want to defocus my eyes, I feel like I'm fully automated, and it is not me who's typing, although I KNOW it's me.
Please, tell me if this is just anxiety. I can't get quick help since I need health insurance, and it won't be done until Friday...
I've joined this forums simply because I can't take it anymore. I am feeling bad almost all the time. I am uncertain whether it's just anxiety/panic attacks, or something more.
Throughout the day, I am feeling dissociated. I am feeling as if it's not actually me doing the talking, walking, and all interactions, but some automated part of me, and I, the conscious part, hover somewhere behind, ready to leave at any moment. Everything seems strange and unnatural. I know this might be derealization, but I am afraid I'm losing my sanity...However, this has been going on just for a few days, 4 or 5, and not more.
Before all this, I've been to the ER, I thought my heart stopped beating. I felt as if I were about to faint (I've NEVER fainted in my entire life), my fists started clenching, jaws shut, then my fingers froze in an open palm position, and my lips contracted, and I couln't control them in any way. That happened at the ER and lasted for a minute at most. Hearing was well, and so was vision, so it was not a stroke, thankfully.
Throughout the day, I feel like my vision is blurring sometimes, my ears become plugged, and I feel some kind of pressure inside my cranium, then again, the fainting feeling kicks in, but I never actually faint. My hands go cold because I become agitated, sometimes I feel like I can't feel my heart beating, other times I feel it racing, it's weird, but I fear something more serious. Yesterday night I could feel some sort of sensory rush, like an electric jolt through all my teeth, and then I felt like fainting. An hour later, my heart was pounding so hard, I could feel my pulse in my jaw, and if I left my jaw free, the teeth would touch when the heart pulsed, so heavy was it beating.
I don't know what's happening to me. My bloodwork was fine, normal magnesium and calcium levels, everything was ok. My organs are fine (ecography), my thyroid is perfectly fine. EKGs and oxygen levels in the blood said that my heart was fine too, even when I was at the ER.
Even now, I feel numb, derealized. I want to defocus my eyes, I feel like I'm fully automated, and it is not me who's typing, although I KNOW it's me.
Please, tell me if this is just anxiety. I can't get quick help since I need health insurance, and it won't be done until Friday...