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Richard77
09-26-2007, 06:55 AM
Hi Im currently suffering from Anxiety/Depression and have had 2 or 3 episodes of this in the last 10yrs.
For some reason when an episode starts I'll just be going along doing an everyday task, then all of a sudden I'll feel really wierd like Im not really their, kind of in a dream and nothing around me is real.
Straight away this causes me to panic which makes my head worse which then makes me panic even more.
I then try and justify that Im there in my mind but this leads me to other questions like why am I there and Oh no Im actually on a planet thats spinning around in space. These thoughts start to scare me even more as there true, but theres nothing I can do about them.
Are these sorts of thoughts common with Anxiety or am I just been stupid and need to snap out of it. The problem is the more I try to forget the more I am unable.
My last attack was about 18months ago and I was given Citalpram 20mg.
I started to feel better after about a month of taking them then it took another few months to feel myself again.
I reduced my dose to 10mg at the beginning of summer and suppose have been feeling tired since then.
After a party this weekend on Sunday afternoon it all started again.

VAUGHANY
09-26-2007, 10:43 AM
hi there,i feel as if i suffer the same as u do, i started having anxiety when i was 13,but didnt know wot it was at the time and was too scared to go to the doctors,had this for about 4 years,then it seemed like it dissapeared,untill it started again in febuary and went to the doctor and he told me it was anxiety.im still feeling this way,but feel i can recover if i teach myself to accept the thoughts and symptoms that im having but jst put them to one side in my mind.
Dont worry i think ur thoughts are suffered by many others,cuz i always start thinkin real crazy stuff like "why am i on this planet and how were we all made,sum1 must of been 1st" and also "am i jst imagine all this life and no1 else is real".
everyday it feels like a battle to keep myself from suddenly loosin conciousness,thats how it feels.
and like u i went the doctor to do every test on me possible to reasure that i aint dying. ive had blood tests,hearing tests,chest xray,eye test,an ECG and worn a heart monitor for two days. but in my mind it still doesnt feel like enough,but they are the experts and if they say everything is fine then i guess it is,and its my mind playing tricks on me.
Ive recently purchased a book called At Last A Life by Paul David,he is an ex-sufferer,who suffered for 10 years and is now fully recovered,he teaches u how to accept the way u feel and soon it will come easier,the 1st few pages made me seem so much happier,but i think it may be something u will want to read a few times to let it sink deep into ur mind and wot to do wen feeling worse. sorry that i have gone on so long.i jst hope this helps u,and understand that u r no different to any1 else on here,liam.

Richard77
09-26-2007, 11:41 AM
Thanks for that

So you think these kind of thoughts are quite common Im not going mad.
The problem is Im thinking about something that is infact true, we are just on a little tiny planet in really really big space and this is scaring me not sure why but it is! So if Im scared of something that I can't change and can't just dismiss what can I do. I've thought about this sort of stuff before, but for over 48hrs non stop and been scared just thinking about it.
Is it just time that will sort it out.
I've heard of this De-relaization thing is it all to do with that, as I do feel really disconnected at the moment

Rich

RichB
09-26-2007, 05:32 PM
Depersonalization and scary thoughts are very common with anxiety, you can see them both discussed in the http://www.DrivingFear.com program home page.

The Sunday night after partying probably doesn't help either, I know it doesn't for me :)

Richard77
09-27-2007, 02:40 AM
The problem is I can't get away from thee thoughts even if I lay down and relax I don't know what to do, any advice would be great, I feel so low and don't think I can take much more of it

VAUGHANY
09-27-2007, 03:37 AM
hiya,like i mentioned after reading that book,i felt so much better and determined to recover from this.
i know exactly where ur coming from, especially wiv depersonalizaion,cuz i suffer 24/7 wiv it to,and have all the thoughts that u have and sometimes it does scare me, but the best treatment for it as Paul David says in his book is to accept that it is there and accept that u feel like this.
cuz the more u try to fight it and tense ur body up and also try and ignore ur symptoms the worse it will get.basically the reason u feel the way u do is because ur mind and nerves are tired from constant worrying and tension and they are cyring out for a rest,do u ever wonder y u jump so much wen a door slams etc,its because ur nerves are already sensitised,for example a person that doesnt suffer from anxiety,wen a door slams they wud jump and it wud sensitise their nerves,where as people with anxiety who's nerves are already sensitised,u know where im getting at?! even if someone touches are backs we jump. our sensitised nerves and tired mind need a rest from constant worry.
so jst keep telling urself " i know im feeling this this way,but its only temporary and i will get better".
please DON'T try and FIGHT ur symptoms or IGNORE ur symptoms cuz this does not help u on the road to recovery.
jst ACCEPT ur symptoms,because after all they mite be scary sometimes,but jst think have they actually ever hurt me??!!!
hope this helps u,liam.

Richard77
09-27-2007, 04:10 AM
SO is it OK to go ahead and just let my mind wonder and if it wants to think that stuff just let it?

Should I just carry on as normal as possible and let the thoughts just run through my mind, in a way do you think if you just let go and accept your mind will just get bored thinking the same old thing and just stop thinking about it.

Whats the best thing to do with the symtoms these thoughts give, is there anything I can do to releave the butterfly and tense feeling in my chest, if I could stop that Im sure I could deal with the rest better. I've tried to just lay and relax but that just seems to make it worse. NAy suggestion would help so much

Thanks

Richard

VAUGHANY
09-27-2007, 06:36 AM
the only reason y it isnt making u better wen u lay and relax is bacause ur still worrying about ur symptoms and thinking of them.or maybe cuz ur tyring hard to ignore them,which is basically the same as worrying cuz ur still taking notice in them.
yes all u got to do is accept thE fact these symptoms are here and carry on doin normal things that u used to do, i.e things that make u think "I DONT WANNA GO THERE,JST INCASE THIS HAPPENS,OR I WILL FEEL FUNNY WHEN IM THERE"try not to even think that and jst go and do wot u want to do,then in time ur mind will start thinking "hey,y was i scared,this isnt too bad" and will start gettin into that routine.
but yes,jst let the symptoms flow and keep saying to urself " i know ur there,but in time u wont" like i said they have never hurt u before so y still panic that they will,liam.

VAUGHANY
09-27-2007, 06:39 AM
oh and ur symptoms shud start fading aslong as u keep acceptin that they are there,and the butterys and chest problems are all due to sensitised nerves as i said,they are jst screaming for a break,so jst go ahead and accept it all and do things as u used to.

Richard77
09-27-2007, 07:44 AM
So with acceptance and time I should get over this again.

I take it the thoughts I am thinking would not normally effect me if I was OK as I've always known that Im on a planet in a big galaxy, i used to be well intersted in it when I was a kid, it didn't scare me it was good.
Im just really confussed why Im thinking about it thats all, is it just a fact that if it wasn't that it would be something else.
The thoughts came a few days after the attack happened so I take it these thoughts are just symtoms.

Sorry I keep asking these questions but just doing this is really helping so thanks

VAUGHANY
09-27-2007, 08:02 AM
its quite allright,i still have my up and down days, but u cant worry about the bad days,because wen we were normal we never used to bother about bad days or worry so much, we jst took it in our stride,so thats wot we need to do now, every1 gets bad days on the road to recovery.
i was the the same as u,wen i was a kid i was amazed by the universe and always loved finding more about different planets,etc.
the reason y ur having these thoughts now and getting scared of them is because ur mind is physically tired since u had ur attack from constant worry about wot is causing u to feel this way and tries to search further for explanations as it shud normally do,which automatically puts u in a worried,strange,dizzy,dream like state.
i really think u shud purchase that book,it basically explains the emphasis that i am trying to pass across to u,but i fell in a better way,than trying to explain myself.
i think im going to read through mine again to refresh my memory,so hpefully it will come natual in my mind.

VAUGHANY
09-27-2007, 08:08 AM
but yes acceptance and time,will see u through,but the most important thing is not to try and rush recovery as all individuals are different and will recover at different times.
do not try and set a target,i.e "ive gotta try and get better before i go on holiday,or christmas",woteva. because obviously this is puttin more demand on ur tired mind,and will not help u recover,jst let time and acceptance take its role.

RichB
09-27-2007, 02:27 PM
The more you try to stop them, the more you'll have, like trying to not think of a pink elephant.

Richard77
09-29-2007, 06:29 AM
Hi Well its saturday now and am starting to feel a little better.
The thoughts are not causing me panic anymore just feel unpleaseant.
which is a big improvement on how things have been.
On Thursday night I felt horrible then after doing some research on the internet found a technique called TFT wich is a process of tapping different areas of the body while thinking about the problem. For some strange reason it seemed to work and after practicing the routine for about 10 mins the symtoms became less, so the thoughts had less of an effect on me. This enabled me to have a good nights sleep at last.
Although I'm still not completely better it seems to have helped alot.

Rich

abcdefghix
09-30-2007, 02:02 AM
No worries. What you are dealing with is a common symptom of anxiety.

Now, if you are like the rest of us, you're next question will probably be: how do I make this horrible symptom go away?

Unfortunately, this question is the problem.

The natural reaction to a disturbing thought is to suppress it, block it out, rationalize it, argue with your mind abou it, etc. But, as you will notice with time, doing this strengthens its presence in your mind--this makes the anxiety worse!

When it comes to anxious thoughts and experiences, the more you try to prevent them, control them, rationalize them, suppress them, medicate them, or otherwise make them go away, the WORSE they get.

Consider an analogy: have you ever put your finger in a chinese finger trap? To get your finger out of this sort of trap, your natural inclination is to PULL. But the more you PULL the tighter it gets. This is how our attempts to escape from panic tends to create more panic. We PULL, and it gets worse, so we PULL harder, and it gets even worse, and so on.

So how do you get your finger out? You gently PUSH inwards and make space. You loosen things up by NOT trying to escape.

In the same way, the best way to deal with anxious thoughts and feelings is to accept them and to let go of attempts to control them. You can feel safe doing this because they are JUST thoughts and feelings, they are not a threat to you, they will not harm you. They are products of your mind--they do not represent reality.

When you have feelings of unreality try this: take a deep breath and just let the feelings happen, even though you don't like them. Let your mind do what it wants to do and just wait for the waves to pass--you know from experience that they will. What you will notice over time is that the feelings will just dry up and blow away. They depend for their existence on your resistance to them, and when you stop resisting, they tend to quietly disappear.

Best wishes,
--abcdefghix

Richard77
09-30-2007, 09:27 AM
I just get stressed out with myself cause I try and get on and do stuff, every day stuff and then 5mins later its pops back into my mind, is just a question of carrying on and the time I forget the thoughts will just get longer and longer apart

Richard77
10-02-2007, 06:44 AM
I've been suffering from my anxiety since last Sunday.
THe thoughts are still there I will not seem to shift I can't relax anywhere without thinking these thoughts unless I am asleep.
So even if I just sit and watch TV the thoughts are still there I just don't knowwhat to do. I thought I would be feeling better bu now but just feel stuck in this big mess with no way out

Richard77
10-07-2007, 12:29 PM
Hi

Well anbother week has gone and Im feeling a little better now, the thoughts are still there but Im able to do alot more thngs now even with them going on in the background. I have felt low at certain points but I guess thats just part of getting better.
This forum has been so much help to me it really makes me feel that Im not alone in all this so thanks alot

Rich

CallMeCrazy
10-07-2007, 09:44 PM
I know exactly how you guys feel. Don't feel like you're alone and going crazy. My depersonalization all started after I tried to cut down on my Citalopram from 10 to 5 mg. It was the craziest feeling I have ever have. I was feeling pretty normal a while back so that's why I decided to try to taper off the medication. All of the sudden I would start thinking about dying and all the other things you have described. Just thinking about how large the universe is would make me freak out. I would feel like my body was just going through the motions. It also seemed like nothing would get me excited or make me relax. I wouldn't hardly recognize myself in the mirror. I'm still dealing with some of it but I'm hoping I will get back to "normal" eventually. :evil: