Gatsby
05-30-2013, 03:49 PM
So, I unfortunately experienced a bad panic attack this morning as soon as I got to school. I haven't had a panic attack since Mother's Day and the attacks usually don't occur at/during school so today's episode was a bit unsettling.
My heart was beating rapidly, my left temple and both hands had a tingling/pins-and-needles sensation and my depersonalization was VERY bad. I was very nauseous as well and kept telling myself I was going to be sick... I strayed away from my chatty friends and just let the wave hit me, fidgeting like crazy. The class I was sitting in I was assigned to do an in-class poetic analysis (English is my forte, I do well in the subject and I love writing and reading so facing the anxiety in my favorite class was odd). When initially reading the poem and questions, my mind was racing 100 miles a minute and my brain was so muddled that I thought of calling home. Let me rephrase that...I was 99.9% convinced of going into the washroom and calling my mother to come pick me up. In the flight-or-fight response that I experience when having a panic attack, I usually flee, avoiding any situation requiring interaction or tasks. Today was different.
Today I fought it. "No", I told myself when contemplating on excusing myself to the washroom. "Don't run. This will pass. At school or not, these attacks happen. And they pass. You KNOW this. Focus, c'mon now, you're all here, just focus". And y'know...I did. I took a deep breath and read the poem several times and answered every question to the best of my ability.
Once the class ended, I felt EXTREMELY fatigued. This is usual for me after a panic attack. Even though I was tired, I found myself calm, no longer panicked. I talked to my friends like normal and got along with my day just fine.
....Hurrah! ;)
My heart was beating rapidly, my left temple and both hands had a tingling/pins-and-needles sensation and my depersonalization was VERY bad. I was very nauseous as well and kept telling myself I was going to be sick... I strayed away from my chatty friends and just let the wave hit me, fidgeting like crazy. The class I was sitting in I was assigned to do an in-class poetic analysis (English is my forte, I do well in the subject and I love writing and reading so facing the anxiety in my favorite class was odd). When initially reading the poem and questions, my mind was racing 100 miles a minute and my brain was so muddled that I thought of calling home. Let me rephrase that...I was 99.9% convinced of going into the washroom and calling my mother to come pick me up. In the flight-or-fight response that I experience when having a panic attack, I usually flee, avoiding any situation requiring interaction or tasks. Today was different.
Today I fought it. "No", I told myself when contemplating on excusing myself to the washroom. "Don't run. This will pass. At school or not, these attacks happen. And they pass. You KNOW this. Focus, c'mon now, you're all here, just focus". And y'know...I did. I took a deep breath and read the poem several times and answered every question to the best of my ability.
Once the class ended, I felt EXTREMELY fatigued. This is usual for me after a panic attack. Even though I was tired, I found myself calm, no longer panicked. I talked to my friends like normal and got along with my day just fine.
....Hurrah! ;)