Ryulightorb
05-19-2013, 02:25 AM
I have OCD Depression and Anxiety
I have horrible anxiety i get anxious about things like my eye touching it and i did it.
When i was in the shop i was shaking from anxiety and i saw this ugly woman infront of me and i thought of sexs it was gross i feel grossed out now.
But it feels like part of me is telling me i like the idea and now when i think of friends family or my griflriends friends the idea of sex comes up i feel grossed but part of me feels like its saying i like it at the same time.
I noticed when im anxious i think things like what if i don't like my girlfriend and then i start believing it and then i feel sad and part of me it feels like saying no your happy be happy you don't like her but i know i love her but it feels li don't when im anxious for some reason it scares me.
It feels like part of me wants to lose my girlfriend i told her and she is upset with me its like there is a voice in my head saying i like things i don't then i have two conflicting ideas.
Like my friend was talking and i felt anxious and somehow the thought of sex with her appeared in my head i felt awful and felt like a cheater and a sicko but told myself i don't feel that way as i don't want to be a sicko but part of me basically said the opposite so i have both two conflicting ideas in my head and im losing track of what is me and whats not.
I said to her i don't want to lose her and part of me just felt like i did want to lose her and right now im crying and confused its like im not myself i don't get it.
My girlfriend does psychology and says it's most likely some desires or somethign and i should be ashamed etcd but i don't want to be like that i don't want those negative feelings yet at the same time it feels like i do want those feelings it's driving me crazy.
I don't want to tell anyone that knows me irl as i don't want to be judged i feel like im going crazy.
My girlfriend said only i know and have to figure out myself but thats the thing i can't and its scaring me to the point i can't stop crying.
This is a serious question
I have horrible anxiety i get anxious about things like my eye touching it and i did it.
When i was in the shop i was shaking from anxiety and i saw this ugly woman infront of me and i thought of sexs it was gross i feel grossed out now.
But it feels like part of me is telling me i like the idea and now when i think of friends family or my griflriends friends the idea of sex comes up i feel grossed but part of me feels like its saying i like it at the same time.
I noticed when im anxious i think things like what if i don't like my girlfriend and then i start believing it and then i feel sad and part of me it feels like saying no your happy be happy you don't like her but i know i love her but it feels li don't when im anxious for some reason it scares me.
It feels like part of me wants to lose my girlfriend i told her and she is upset with me its like there is a voice in my head saying i like things i don't then i have two conflicting ideas.
Like my friend was talking and i felt anxious and somehow the thought of sex with her appeared in my head i felt awful and felt like a cheater and a sicko but told myself i don't feel that way as i don't want to be a sicko but part of me basically said the opposite so i have both two conflicting ideas in my head and im losing track of what is me and whats not.
I said to her i don't want to lose her and part of me just felt like i did want to lose her and right now im crying and confused its like im not myself i don't get it.
My girlfriend does psychology and says it's most likely some desires or somethign and i should be ashamed etcd but i don't want to be like that i don't want those negative feelings yet at the same time it feels like i do want those feelings it's driving me crazy.
I don't want to tell anyone that knows me irl as i don't want to be judged i feel like im going crazy.
My girlfriend said only i know and have to figure out myself but thats the thing i can't and its scaring me to the point i can't stop crying.
This is a serious question