Please advise!!!!

[Blessed]

Ok. Here I go yet again! All day I have felt the strong surge of heart palpitations where my heart shakes with a string "thud" then shutters as if it is vibrating out of its on shell!!!!!! Please remind me again how I'm supposed to make myself believe this is just anxiety. My heart beat is regular BUT it is very very hard and strong as if it pulsating my entire body.....zap....zap......zap! I AM SO AGGRAVATED WITH MYSELF RIGHT NOW PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!

[Blessed]

I just took two Ativan and I feel so defeated this is bull!!!!!!

[Judie]

Hey Blessed, I was just going to respond on the other page but I can do it here just as well. The Atenolol you are on is a Beta Blocker, Beta Blockers are given for a number of reasons,high blood pressure, arrhythmias,chest pain, migraines and for you anxiety. Beta Blockers work by suppressing adrenaline from the adrenal glands ( on the kidneys) Kidneys work hand in hand with the heart. So it is the perfect med for anxiety sufferers.Your Dr is using the Beta Blocker to prevent/treat the anxiety induced tachycardia and palpitations. Your heart is NOT shaking, they are harmless flutters and that THUD you speak of is an extra heartbeat ( that most suffer from...definitely me ! ) called a PVC that is harmless. As we talked about before anxiety sufferers have highly sensitive reactions, they "feel" everything in a heightened sense, that means all those meaningless symptoms.
Yes you are right this is BULL !!! But becoming aggravated isn't going to help the situation. Be kind to yourself, your mom's death really really really shook you up. You have a death anxiety, you are afraid you are going to die in the same fashion your mom did ? Am I close ? Do you notice that you focus a lot on the symptoms related to the heart and BP. The other anxiety sufferers take a different focus depending on an underlying trauma.For instance someone who loses their breath from hyperventilation may be repressed in their lives, told to be quiet, treated as if their opinion " just doesn't matter " The triggers for people with anxiety disorders are as varied and numerous as the symptoms. Yours is very similar to mine so I recognize fears and triggers. OK time for some logic " You are not going to die in the same fashion/age as your mom. You have a DR that is watching you ok...But I will tell you unless we can really work on you being nonreactive to these meaningless symptoms you will feel lousy. You took two Ativan ( probably sleeping now :) ) Can I ask you when was the last time you took them ? I have mixed feelings on anti anxiety meds ( in an acute crisis I thing they're invaluable but for a long time solution SSRI's are a better choice. Antianxiety meds ( clonipine, xanax, ativan ) work extremely well but over time you build up resistance and have to take more and more for the same effect ( this is true of any addictive med especially opiates ( percocets, oxycontin, etc ). I do support anti-anxiety med usage ( provided you are a non addictive personality, otherwise no way), especially when in a crisis mode. The other thing they do is they have " rebound" effect as you begin to get closer to the time for a next dose they actually increase your anxiety, the longer you are on them, the longer and more profound effect that anxiety will have. What's a person to do ? It's a tough one and certainly individual in nature. Willard Scott ( Weatherman on Today Show for many many years ) did what I believe is your best strategy. He kept a tranquilizer in his pocket, that was his safety net. He didn't take them or perhaps very seldom but it enabled him to have the confidence " that it was there if he needed". Again the mind comes into play because he had this security, he didn't need it. I sometimes practice this strategy and it works for me as well. For many of you, this is something for you to consider down the road. For now listen to your DRS and hopefully one that understands this disorder. Taking an Ativan or even two isn't defeat, it's trying to cope with something. But if you keep using the term " defeat" you may have to wave a white flag and let the disorder control you NO NO NO we won't let that happen. Ok let's see start googling " miracles" and affirmation stories. For me every time someone dies I receive a white feather. Very odd as they would just show up randomly on the floor where ever. Last year a beautiful white hawk feather ended up on the front seat of my locked vehicle. BUT this was in direct response to having lost an old friend to which I had said the day before " John I am waiting for my feather, everyone gives me white feathers when I lose them, where's yours. The next day there it was. His children love this story, I hope you do as well. I researched " white feathers" they symbolize spirituality and eternity and are often found by individuals that have lost people. My mom's death " shocked " my system as well. We will keep working on this !

[Blessed]

Thanks Judie. Just not a good day at all for me.

[Judie]

Well it really is part of the disorder, well part of life actually good days and bad. My tooth completely cracked, that means 2,500 dollars and I hate the dentist, given that she put epinephrine in my Novocaine at one point and caused a full blown attack. Also my daughter graduates from college this week-end ( 8 hours away) So if this tooth abcesses this week-end I am in trouble. Bad day right lol, we all have them and I too have to work at mindset so don't worry. Tomorrow will be better.

[Blessed]

Yes it has to be. Good luck with your tooth

[Judie]

How's the day ? Hope your thoughts are good :)