Stull having triuble believing this is all anxiety

[Want2feelnormalagn]

I've been a reader for a long time but this is my first post so here it goes..

The first problem I had was Nov 30 2011 I was just sitting at home watching movies with my kids when I felt a rush of heat through my chest and my heart took off beating super fast I thought I was going to pass out and I had my husband drive me to the hospital where they did EKG and blood and said probably sudden onset vertigo.. Ok fast forward to today and I have had many more attacks with many more symptoms including chest pain and head pressure and many tests including 30 day heart monitor, treadmill test, heart echo, lots of blood work, endoscopy, bladder ultrasound and I am currently on a 48 hr heart monitor. I have lost close to 20 lbs I was never heavy to start and I don't feel like myself. This scares the crap out of me and I just want to feel normal again. I'm so tired of being tired and having so many constant symptoms that I can barely make it through a day without breaking down.

Sorry this is so long I have just never really talked about all of it..

[Want2feelnormalagn]

Oops 2012 not 2011.

[missmello]

Have you lost weight because you're not eating as much? My first panic attack happened a few yrs ago, and it was while I was lying in bed watching tv, my heart began to race out of nowhere. Sounds just like what u felt. They did the same for me with the heart monitors and heart ultrasound and ekg, and found nothing wrong. Im having a pretty awful bout of anxiety right now that has lasted for over a month, its all related to nausea and loss of appetite now though, and I've lost 12lbs. I am an average size person so it is freaking me out too. Even though they ran every test imaginable (ekg, blood, urine, xrays, cat scan, upper endoscopy) I'm having a hard time convincing myself it is just anxiety also. Hang in there.

[Want2feelnormalagn]

Thank you. I just can't believe this can really all be anxiety. I wake up every morning shaky and throughout the day feel off my pulse is all over the place throughout the day and to make it worse I work in an emergency department so I see all kinds of stuff and relate it to me:( I just want to wake up and feel like me again with no meds and take care of my kids.

[jolene]

i can relate to this to, im suffering from anxiety i think but i believe im dying because of how shitty i feel. which makes me worse. docs have just done full blood tests and ecg waiting for results im also been sent to a palpatation clinic. but i ring the docs because i feel i cant cope especially with 3 kids. but its just because i dont want them to sense anything, they seen me at my worst about 4 year ago whilst pregnant and after when i suffered really bad postnatal depression and anxiety. docs put me on citalopram 10mg made me worse so had to give me diazepam to and then put me on 20mg took about six weeks i think to kick in but them 6 weeks were terrible. anyway i got better then stopped taking these about 1 year n half ago stupid me because its returned. docs tried me on fluxetine 20mg about 2 week ago managed 4 days due to how they made me feel side effects were unreal anxiety was worse. he took me off these and said he doesnt think i should be on meds its psychological hahahaha i gathered that! the worst anxiety feeling i have is feeling detatched, like im guna pass out or freak out i could literally take myself to a nut house and say lock me up and sort me out. are you on meds? and do you have any treatment like cbt or anything

[gracejack]

I know I have symptoms that I have a hard time believing they are anxiety as well. Once I was stamped anxiety i feel like people chalk everything up to that and its scary. it has become debilitating for me and i feel terrible for my family. I am working w a therapist and a psych so hopefully once the meds fully kick in, I can see this clearer. I have suffered thru bouts of anxiety over the years and looking back that is what it was, but when you are in the thick of it it is really hard to believe. Ive been thru a ton of tests but feel like they are missing something or its just the start of something. Could you be having migraines too?

[Want2feelnormalagn]

You just described my life I swear! I started Celexa 9 days ago 10mg (but I cut them in half and take 5) and Ativan for just in case. The Ativan takes the edge off when I feel in crawling out if my skin but so far nothing has completely taken away the physical stuff headaches chest pain heart palps ect.. I also hate the not feeling like myself like I'm out of it and I keep thinking this is my body warning me that I'm going to die. I HATE this!! I keep calling my doc for tests because I just know its something physical and I think he is sick of me! I called for an apt last week and his nurse was so rude she told me just to drink some Gatorade and relax at home.. Really lady I am the worst I've ever felt! They also put me on antibiotics thinking maybe the headaches were related to a sinus infection. All the antibiotics have done is give me diarrhea. I just want to be here and enjoy my kids.

[Want2feelnormalagn]

Gracejack,

I don't think it's migraines as I've had them in the past. But it could all be anxiety I just hate being labeled that because like you said the docs no longer take you serious they just think every little symptom is also anxiety.

[gracejack]

I totally get that. I feel so distracted with all of this health stuff. Mine is tingling in my foot. Achy and feeling like I am so hyper-focused on how I walk and I have muscle twitches etc. I am terrifies of MS or ALS...to name just a few. I feel bad for my family bc I am so focused on myself and I am terrified I will not be here for them bc something is really wring which just further exacerbates the anxiety. Ten years ago mine started out of the blue too. I mean I was always anxious, even as a child, yet not with panic attacks. I was sitting at a restaurant and bam, couldn't catch my breath and front hen on there were months of terrifying attacks. I am back on zoloft now for a few weeks, so hopefully this works and the symptoms subside and I can say to myself, yet this is really anxiety. Although I had a funny test result come up that no one knows what it means and that freakkkkks me out. Also, my anxiety always increases when starting zoloft and then levels off. Have you found this? I just bought a book my John Sarno on mind and body connection which I hope will also help me. But I really think its the fear for my kids that makes this all worse. I feel like am not able to be the mom I was or should be...like i'm faking it.

[Want2feelnormalagn]

I just started the Celexa the first 5 days I was tired shaky confused scared to be alone. I'm not sure if that's because of the meds or because the day before I started them I had a bad attack while driving. I left work and was headed home feeling off when my chest started burning and my heart took off I have an app on my phone to check my pulse and it was 144 so I turned around and headed for the hospital. I thought for sure I was going to black out but I made it there and by the time they hooked me up to the monitor my pulse was at 110. They did blood tests and told me to go see the beat specialist which is booked up but I have an apt with him on the 24th. Do you have a hard time talking during an attack like slurred speech and breathless? Do u feel like you are going to black out? Heart racing chest tingling?

[Want2feelnormalagn]

I hope the Zoloft works for you! I too am terrified for my kids! My youngest is always worried about me she comes over and asks if I'm ok alot:( poor little bug shouldn't have to worry about her momma:(

[gracejack]

Hi, yes, definitely the slurred speech thing. The first word that i feel comes out a little funny, immediately starts getting me more anxious. Like a phrase like "so that's the", will come out as one quick word. I speak quickly anyway, but that makes me feel like i have something neuro. OI have to say I feel this les since being on the zoloft now for a bit..prob a month, but I get this tight tongue and jaw thing. Almost like i were to open my mouth, my tongue would be twitching, but it's not. I do get tingling in other places but not my chest. Years ago I had the breathing thing during panic attacks. I always felt like i needed a deep breath, but that made things worse. I clearly did not really need one, but was obsessed w breathing and getting one. Ive also had heart palps and when I used to check my pulse, i could feel the skipped beats. I went to ER a few weeks ago and they so didn't take me seriously. i went for the foot tingling and they were like why are you here? Ummm, everything i read said see someone fast if that happens! One dr was much kinder and pt with me and the other was like you're wasting my time. I used to feel like i was going to faint many years ago when i had the breathing panic attacks, but i read that is just not possible when having a panic attack so that made me feel better. I also read that you may feel like you are going crazy, but the people that really go crazy have no idea its happening. We are hyper aware!

[jolene]

ive noticed whilst im anxious everyday my heart rate is quite normal, but then if ive been anxious all day sometimes it gets really bad that i cant stop thinking about it and it turns into a panic attack sometimes, but yeah i feel like im just guna drop down on the floor but i also get this walking into a shop or crowded places. i cry most days because of how i feel its crap like. ive just met someone i really like to and feel its stopping me from him taking me out i make excuses up. even though i get 2mg valium/diazepam i only take if defo neccesary, i hate taking tablets. i had to take one the 4th day of taking fluxetine, as i felt so horrible even though i didnt have a panic attack i felt i couldnt stop racing thoughts so i took one 2mg valium and after about 30 mins i was lay on the couch so relaxed and chilled wiped out infact i go a little dizzy off these but i know its normal. ive also noticed i get like a tingly pins n needles type feeling in my chest also weak hands feet, and pins n needles type feeling in lower arm lower legs. i go achy and headaches are terrible sometimes. i think its something more than just anxiety as i feel fainty n spacy sometimes. but if you read about symptoms they are all there. i feel like im going crazy with it all