How about a support wrist band for us?

[bajablue]

One of the posts, I think one from Fording the Waters, got me thinking that there is so much support in the world for people suffering from other illnesses. I found a website called wristbands.net that had support wristbands for every ailment known to man: they are all worthy causes (except maybe the anti-texting support wristband) but there was nothing there for us. ADHD was there. Bi-Polar was there. Worthy yes, but not for me. Beyond that nothing remotely related to a mood disorder. Why? Because of the stigma of our disease. Somehow, the cancer sufferer who smoked 3 packs a day for 30 years garnishes more empathy than some of us, maybe many of us who have suffered tramatic issues that get stuffed inside and emerge as anxiety which is no fault of our own. Even if they had one for us - who would wear it? Most of us if not all go through the day trying to keep our affliction private, inside, away from scrutiny or worse. I'm older now. I made my place in the world no thanks to Anxiety but in spite of it. I am tired of hiding what should be seen as a triumph of the spirit - I beat it for 20 years. Others of you have beaten it for periods of time - in some cases for one day which is just as admirable.

I am ranting and I am sorry. This is my hot button. I have the benefit or curse of having lived with this for a long time. In all these years I have never opened up to my friends. Many of them who have battled cancer, heart surgeries, knee replacements - whom I consoled but whom could not be there for me due to the stigma or my cowardice - being afraid to open up (take your pick).

I am going to stop now. Comments welcome or if I offended anyone I apologize. 98% of my anger is turned inwards on myself but I do reserve 1% for a society that cannot come to grips with the reality that we are as "in need" of societies support as all the others who have wristbands. Oh and I reserve the other 1% of anger for God and that is a private discussion between me and Him.

[bajablue]

It isn't about wristbands but about acceptance within the community of good people suffering from an illness.

[Soundguy1000]

Amen.. too allll of that! Good rational vent Baja!

[PanicCured]

This is so out of line and ridiculous it's amazing! You compare yourself to diseases like cancer and AIDS were people wither away slowly and die in indescribable pain! You don't have a disease! Anxiety is a BS disorder. It is not even a disease. There is a physical component to it, like a hypersensitive nervous system so technically we can say it is a Dis-Ease, but come on dude! This type of thinking does not good for anyone and I am absolutely disgusted by this post.. This forum is bad enough as it's clearly a place where people use it for a pity party instead of taking action. Look at most of the forum subjects in the index and you will see. There is a difference between someone dying of a degenerative disease and someone with anxiety. Anxiety can be cured and overcome because it is a behavioral disorder not a life threatening disease. Just because you decided to live on meds for the rest of your life and live like you can't ever get past it, doesn't mean you have to influence others to do the same. What you are saying is "Why not get a wristband and just surrender to this lifelong tragic incurable illness called Anxiety and just accept you have anxiety like someone has AIDS." This is sickening to read and I recommend NOBODY to follow this guy's example. He does not understand the mechanism of anxiety and how to cure it. He does not tap into the Will that I frequently speak about. I am appalled at your posts. This one and the one about how you get angry if a doctor at the ER doesn't take you as seriously as someone who is dying. Are you kidding me? This is why you are still suffering and I and others are not. Because we don't think in this way. Your thinking is all messed up here! I suggest you wake up and figure it out, and then you can actually get better instead of trying to find ways to surrender to your anxiety disorder. GIVE ME A BREAK! Most ridiculous post I have ever read!

[trinidiva]

Wow PanicCured, I found your post unnecessarily abrasive and trust me, this isn't the first time. I think you may need to revisit elementary social skills class and learn the proper way to address someone without being over the top.
It's almost bordering on being a bully....
While it is obvious that you don't agree, I think you need to work on presenting yourself better so that perhaps people will be more willing to listen to your point of view, rather than shutting down.
You have had some very thought provoking posts in the past, with good some good information that I have personally found useful and also some things I haven't found particularily relevant to my situation, but even if I don't agree, that doesn't give me ANY right to step on and make you feel bad about your opinion. If I disagree, there is a proper way to discuss things.
All I am saying, is please extend the same type of respect to others that you would like to receive.
As far as the wristbands, I do understand to a degree what is being said. I'm personally not a wristband sort of gal, but there IS a cloud of mystery and shame built around anxiety and depression disorders, and I think if more people understood and were more educated about it, a lot of people wouldn't suffer in silence.

[Saldav]

This is so out of line and ridiculous it's amazing! You compare yourself to diseases like cancer and AIDS were people wither away slowly and die in indescribable pain! You don't have a disease! Anxiety is a BS disorder. It is not even a disease. There is a physical component to it, like a hypersensitive nervous system so technically we can say it is a Dis-Ease, but come on dude! This type of thinking does not good for anyone and I am absolutely disgusted by this post.. This forum is bad enough as it's clearly a place where people use it for a pity party instead of taking action. Look at most of the forum subjects in the index and you will see. There is a difference between someone dying of a degenerative disease and someone with anxiety. Anxiety can be cured and overcome because it is a behavioral disorder not a life threatening disease. Just because you decided to live on meds for the rest of your life and live like you can't ever get past it, doesn't mean you have to influence others to do the same. What you are saying is "Why not get a wristband and just surrender to this lifelong tragic incurable illness called Anxiety and just accept you have anxiety like someone has AIDS." This is sickening to read and I recommend NOBODY to follow this guy's example. He does not understand the mechanism of anxiety and how to cure it. He does not tap into the Will that I frequently speak about. I am appalled at your posts. This one and the one about how you get angry if a doctor at the ER doesn't take you as seriously as someone who is dying. Are you kidding me? This is why you are still suffering and I and others are not. Because we don't think in this way. Your thinking is all messed up here! I suggest you wake up and figure it out, and then you can actually get better instead of trying to find ways to surrender to your anxiety disorder. GIVE ME A BREAK! Most ridiculous post I have ever read!

WTF!!! Why are you even on this forum? you must have no life! All you do here is belittle people and their post. If you are "cured" then get the fuck out of here and enjoy life. Why waste your time on a forum for anxiety when your not even helping but just putting people down.

[bajablue]

This is so out of line and ridiculous it's amazing! You compare yourself to diseases like cancer and AIDS were people wither away slowly and die in indescribable pain! You don't have a disease! Anxiety is a BS disorder. It is not even a disease. There is a physical component to it, like a hypersensitive nervous system so technically we can say it is a Dis-Ease, but come on dude! This type of thinking does not good for anyone and I am absolutely disgusted by this post.. This forum is bad enough as it's clearly a place where people use it for a pity party instead of taking action. Look at most of the forum subjects in the index and you will see. There is a difference between someone dying of a degenerative disease and someone with anxiety. Anxiety can be cured and overcome because it is a behavioral disorder not a life threatening disease. Just because you decided to live on meds for the rest of your life and live like you can't ever get past it, doesn't mean you have to influence others to do the same. What you are saying is "Why not get a wristband and just surrender to this lifelong tragic incurable illness called Anxiety and just accept you have anxiety like someone has AIDS." This is sickening to read and I recommend NOBODY to follow this guy's example. He does not understand the mechanism of anxiety and how to cure it. He does not tap into the Will that I frequently speak about. I am appalled at your posts. This one and the one about how you get angry if a doctor at the ER doesn't take you as seriously as someone who is dying. Are you kidding me? This is why you are still suffering and I and others are not. Because we don't think in this way. Your thinking is all messed up here! I suggest you wake up and figure it out, and then you can actually get better instead of trying to find ways to surrender to your anxiety disorder. GIVE ME A BREAK! Most ridiculous post I have ever read!

BS disorder? I stand by everything I wrote and if that is what you feel about this Forum; about the people on this Forum, then find the door and leave. BTW, my wife has beat cancer and my little bro died from AIDs. I have plenty of perspective on both.

[kbuzz1]

BajaBlue you were spot on with your original post and I also stand behind every word of it. Stress and worry aren't a disease, but having chronic stress and worry for no reason, to the point where it negatively affects your life......that's a disease.

Paniccured I'm glad you 'know the mechanism of anxiety and how to cure it.' Somehow 7 billion people in the world can't figure out the intricacies of this disease and yet you have it all figured out. Congratulations. I look forward to your articles in the American Journal of Medicine.

[jessed03]

Lol, Panic, you court controversy don't you? :D

I understand your point man, I do... I consider myself in an advanced stage of recovery, anxiety rarely bothers me... It is very frustrating, dishing out advice that you know works, and having people not follow it, it's frustrating watching people go around the same patterns, when with a little investigation, they can be broken. But people are suffering badly... The same way I suffered badly, and for a long time! Anxiety can feel as bad as cancer to a sufferer, you know that. People are trying to figure out their minds and their bodies, people are trying to regain confidence. Some peoples minds are blown through stress. It isn't easy. You'll accomplish much more in life with sugar, rather than salt. Be nice to people man... You're advice is good most of the time, but it isn't your job to heal people. Give advice, and step back, and let everyone go at their own pace. Those that need your help will find you, the others will find their own paths.

It's important people are allowed to vent here, without fear of being judged.

On the subject of wristbands, I guess the reason why anxiety get's ignored on the mental health chart, is that 'technically' it's a curable ailment. ADD, Bipolar etc... They aren't curable, they are life long afflictions. It's rare, but people with anxiety can be cured within a matter of days. It's good for them, but it makes the condition look quite mild, and makes those who take longer to be cured, look dramatic. Anxiety sufferers have always had a bad wrap. I remember my mum telling me how doctors used to roll their eyes at her, and give her a months worth of valium to stop her being dramatic. Thankfully times have moved on much more. It makes the pioneers like Claire Weeks look so much more special too.

[bajablue]

Lol, Panic, you court controversy don't you? :D

I understand your point man, I do... I consider myself in an advanced stage of recovery, anxiety rarely bothers me... It is very frustrating, dishing out advice that you know works, and having people not follow it, it's frustrating watching people go around the same patterns, when with a little investigation, they can be broken. But people are suffering badly... The same way I suffered badly, and for a long time! Anxiety can feel as bad as cancer to a sufferer, you know that. People are trying to figure out their minds and their bodies, people are trying to regain confidence. Some peoples minds are blown through stress. It isn't easy. You'll accomplish much more in life with sugar, rather than salt. Be nice to people man... You're advice is good most of the time, but it isn't your job to heal people. Give advice, and step back, and let everyone go at their own pace. Those that need your help will find you, the others will find their own paths.

It's important people are allowed to vent here, without fear of being judged.

On the subject of wristbands, I guess the reason why anxiety get's ignored on the mental health chart, is that 'technically' it's a curable ailment. ADD, Bipolar etc... They aren't curable, they are life long afflictions. It's rare, but people with anxiety can be cured within a matter of days. It's good for them, but it makes the condition look quite mild, and makes those who take longer to be cured, look dramatic. Anxiety sufferers have always had a bad wrap. I remember my mum telling me how doctors used to roll their eyes at her, and give her a months worth of valium to stop her being dramatic. Thankfully times have moved on much more. It makes the pioneers like Claire Weeks look so much more special too.

I was just using the wristband notion as a metaphor. I also agree with some of the points PanicCured makes in his Sticky Note posts about ways to beat/minimize anxiety. I have used some aspects of many of those suggestions to both good and poor results. But I do believe that a total cure for many is not a destination but a journey. I got my life back but it took a couple years of hard work. I had nothing but normal levels of anxiety for years after that work. For me though, the triggers remained and as lifes stresses rebuilt, my defences were less effective. The journey continues. As for airing your views in a destructively angry rant aimed at people on this site - I believe there is no room here for that. I can take it now, but there was a time when his attack on my opinion would have crushed me. And that is what it was an opinion.

[PanicCured]

BTW, my wife has beat cancer and my little bro died from AIDs. I have plenty of perspective on both.

So your poor brother who died of AIDS you think is equal to your anxiety disorder? That is absurd! If any of you agree with him, you have a serious twisted perspective. That is just so wrong on so many levels!

[PanicCured]

Wow PanicCured, I found your post unnecessarily abrasive and trust me, this isn't the first time. I think you may need to revisit elementary social skills class and learn the proper way to address someone without being over the top.
It's almost bordering on being a bully....

This is not bullying. He has disrespected all people who have REAL diseases. There are some serious diseases out here that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy, that he thinks is just like anxiety. It isn't. The other thing, is this type of thinking, that anxiety sufferers should wear a wrist band, or when he said he is no different at an ER then a guy with a broken arm, this hinders people's growth and keeps people in chains. This is not the correct perspective to get better.

But I realize that most people on this site are not here to get better, like I was when I first came to this site. Most people are here to find a way to live miserably with others and just maintain. I'm just glad some people get what I'm saying, and see to surrender to anxiety like its a disease is the absolute worst thing one can do.

The guy's original post completely goes against any type of healing one can do for people with anxiety.

[bajablue]

This is not bullying. He has disrespected all people who have REAL diseases. There are some serious diseases out here that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy, that he thinks is just like anxiety. It isn't. The other thing, is this type of thinking, that anxiety sufferers should wear a wrist band, or when he said he is no different at an ER then a guy with a broken arm, this hinders people's growth and keeps people in chains. This is not the correct perspective to get better.

But I realize that most people on this site are not here to get better, like I was when I first came to this site. Most people are here to find a way to live miserably with others and just maintain. I'm just glad some people get what I'm saying, and see to surrender to anxiety like its a disease is the absolute worst thing one can do.

The guy's original post completely goes against any type of healing one can do for people with anxiety.

You are an angry person. Not just this rant but in others I've read. You are not respectful of the majority of people here unless they agree with you. "Most people are here to find a way to live miserably with others and just maintain" is about as twisted an opinion, bordering on pathological as you're likely to find on this site. That is BS as you like to say. I am here to relate and comfort others as I can. I work on my recovery from this affliction when it shows itself using every health means I can (yes I know you think anxiety is the result of a weak mind - not an affliction). You have given some good advice in the past on complimentary treatments but your attitude about this not being a disease or illness worthy of compassion similar to other illnesses is misguided. For the record - your disrespectful attacks have been reported so you may need to find a new home to rant.

[weary]

Wow is all I can say .......... I am in complete and udder shock. I have anxiety and panic disorder and I don't know where it came from ...... It started 8 yrs ago out of no where .... How dare anyone day this is not an illness if it were not an illness there would be no medicines so people could attempt to live a somewhat normal life ... I waited 7 yrs to go on medication because I could no longer deal with the chest pains I had every waking moment. bajablue has been an amazing support for me and so many others I came to this forum not knowing what to except but I found people who can actually relate to what I am feeling or experiencing. And this has actually helped me start to move forward. panicure please get over it if we have a bad day we need support if you are cured that is awesome and gives people hope but for those who are suffering do not need to hear that we are all nothing but a bunch of losers and to get over it. If your so much better then we are then get the hell off this site we are all here to support people not belittle or make anyone feel less of themselves. I am sorry but your comments here are crazy.......

I have taken care of others and ran 2 households worked full time taken care of friends all with a new baby so how dare anyone try to say this is not an illness .... Stress can overtake 90 percent of your mind body and soul. Which can trigger a 100 different things,

Bajablue you have been an amazing support system for me and that is the one thing I do not have even with the people I took care of who are the ones who are supposed to support so I thank you Bajablue

[weary]

Oh and one more thing how many have found comfort in this forum knowing you are not alone and someone else out there suffers the same as you do? This is no pity party site or a site for for people to feel sorry for someone else .... It is a support group just like they have for survivors and those suffering other alimentary in life. No matter what it is cancer ... Been there took care of my mom and went to support groups with her ..... Heart disease...... Been there took care of my grandma......... Demetria ...... Again been there while pregnant and watched my grandmother die holding my hand ....... So ya know what panicure......... This is the reality of life we all no matter what need support in some way shape or form and this works for people

[PanicCured]

You guys just don't understand what I am trying to say. Other people here know what I mean. Maybe they can explain it better. You're missing my point.

[trinidiva]

You guys just don't understand what I am trying to say. Other people here know what I mean. Maybe they can explain it better. You're missing my point.

I think its not WHAT you are saying, but HOW you present it. I think you need to understand that the road to learning how to deal with anxiety disorders isn't cut and dry. It's going to be different for everyone, and everyone on here are at different points on that road. As I said earlier, there is a way to say things where people will listen to you rather than getting annoyed with you and shutting down.

[kbuzz1]

Paniccured, if you're really cured, why are you still on this forum? If you're trying to help others then that's great. But I can't understand why you're doing it with such anger. I think most of the people on this forum actually ARE here to get better. Seeking out a forum for support and advice is a huge step towards living a better life.

[PanicCured]

Paniccured, if you're really cured, why are you still on this forum? If you're trying to help others then that's great. But I can't understand why you're doing it with such anger. I think most of the people on this forum actually ARE here to get better. Seeking out a forum for support and advice is a huge step towards living a better life.

Because I help lots of people. I get emails all the time thanking me. I help those who truly want to be helped. Just because I don't help you doesn't mean I am not helping other people. Most of you probably just skimmed what I wrote so are missing the entire point I was trying to make.

The guy is comparing AIDS and Cancer to having anxiety. Not only is this incorrect, but it is very dangerous thinking for those seeking help in anxiety as it goes against everything you need to do to get better from it. I look at that type of thinking as inhibiting people's growth, and frankly, disrespectful to those suffering from, a real life threatening disease.

I said many people come to this forum to have a pity party and just seek company in misery, rather than seeking help. Comfort only takes you so far, but if it is not offered with practical help, then it is not helping. You can tell someone they are ok and not going to die every day for 15 years, but if that person does not actually try and heal their problems, and if advice is not given on how to get past anxiety permanently, that it is only prolonging the problem. Sorry, but I do not see a point in that.

Wearing a wristband is entirely the opposite of what one needs to do. What someone with anxiety needs to do to begin the healing process of getting better, is do their best to pretend they do not have anxiety. Try and act as if they do not have this problem and slowly, little by little, create an anxiety free life. That is how you do it! YOU ACT AS IF and then eventually you won't be acting anymore. That isn't all you do, of course, but that is part of it all. You have to get your butt out there and facing your fears. Your brain then will start creating new pathways. You must change your habits. Unlike someone with a terminal illness.

Some of you will read this and get angry. Others will get what I mean. You can't help everyone.

Coddling only gets you so far. Yes, everyone needs to know they are ok, and this is very comforting, but people need to also be asking, "How do I get past anxiety?" And steps should be given on the "HOW". Unless of course you don't want to get better.

[adrenalyn]

I have to agree with PaniCured here, he makes a good point.


When I first came to this forum I was looking for answers to a lot of questions I had about anxiety and hoping to find someone who found a way to cure their anxiety because I was so tired of dealing with anxiety over the past 25+ years. I wanted to finally put an end to Anxiety and be free of it once and for all!


Finding the numerous lengthly posts that PaniCured posted was a huge relief for me to finally read how anxiety can be cured naturally without taking harmful medications that cause so many side effects and does who knows what to our bodies that we are unaware of...I probably would have been skeptical of his methods 10 years ago but after years of following doctors advice and trying a few Antidepressants which made me feel worse, I am now ready to try a different approach to healing myself.


It's not easy and you do have to put some effort into healing yourself because you are the only one that can. No doctor, therapist, loved one, or friend can do it for you, although the compassion and support can be comforting for a brief period of time , you are back to facing your anxiety by yourself once again.


I do understand that many here are comfortable experimenting with medications and have found some relief but unfortunately it is only temporary. Until we find and understand the root cause of anxiety which is our over sensitized nervous system I am afraid we will be faced with anxiety surfacing when our nervous system gets over loaded again, it is a vicious cycle that keeps popping up.


Thanks again PaniCured for sticking around to help those that are seeking to find the true cause and cure for anxiety. I understand your frustration... but know that everyone chooses what they think works best for them and I do respect their decisions whether I agree or not. All you can do is put the information out there in hopes to help anyone who wishes to try your methods.


Much love to you all and I wish you the best of luck :)

[Armstrong1]

BajaBlue, I appreciate what you said at the beginning of this thread. A couple of things struck me. One it that you have put a life together for yourself in spite of all you've gone through with anxiety and all. That is a VERY posive and encouraging stament for the younger peole on this site. Like you, I'm older than many people on this site, still struggle but in many ways have prevailed over my anxiety and fears, have a good job and true friends, etc. And of course your reference to a wrist band is metaphor! Our "disease" is subjective and usually invisible, much like physical pain and other things are. Medication is essential for some of us. That is a fact. No way could I function at the level that I do without the carefully prescribed meds by my psychiatrist and working with an excellent therapist. Meds aren't for everyone, of course, but, on this forum, people are trying to get better and are asking for advice, other peoples' experience and encouragement. We are not looking for pity. We are looking for help. It takes real guts to tackle our symptoms and I congratulate everyone here who is doing that with support from this forum. Thanks for your contributions. You rock.

[Armstrong1]

PS: I've been on this site for quite a while but had to change my email address just recently so had to start over!

[bajablue]

Thank you Armstrong. Yes, a metaphor. Meds are an element of my well being but so many other things too are employed. I certainly do not pretend mine is the only way to go. I will just say that for me, it worked and I have raised two fine sons, stayed married, kept my career and lived "normally" for all these years. I did have a recent setback which brought me to this site hoping it would have some of the magic I used to find in group therapy. It is much less personal here but it does help at times.

[Armstrong1]

Hey, Baja. Thanks for your private note. Apparently I can't respond till I get a few more posts under my belt now that I''ve had to start over d/t new email address. I'll get there......

[jessed03]

Hey, Baja. Thanks for your private note. Apparently I can't respond till I get a few more posts under my belt now that I''ve had to start over d/t new email address. I'll get there......

Go to the word game on the welcome forum, and wrack up 5 more quick posts so you can use that feature ;)

[Armstrong1]

You are briliiant! Thanks!