I'm having trouble leaving the house today. . .

[GrrOLA]

So last semester, I ended up injuring my knees pretty badly. Because I'm a runner, I took it really hard. Most days I can pull myself together but yesterday I went through a dark spell.

Today, I feel anxious. My chest is tight and my stomach is fluttering. I'm know I have to leave the house soon (I actually should have left about an hour ago) but I can't seem to make myself.

I've experienced this cycle repeatedly since last semester: pulling myself together, having a really bad day (strong feelings of depression), feeling heightened anxiety.

Also, over the winter break, EVERYTHING made me anxious. Such as my parents not being able to figure out where to go to dinner, having to run errands, getting out of bed in the morning, etc.

Does anyone know if this is a byproduct of depression or something else entirely? Does anyone have any advice as to how to deal with this? I'm just not sure where this all is going.

Blessings,

[manz82]

I have felt like you on countless occasions and I think it's a mixture of anxiety and depression. I hate to think of the word 'agoraphobic' because I truly believe the fear of leaving the house is simply our tired bodies and minds wanting to shut down and take a rest. The mistake I made was literally forcing myself out when I felt this way. In hindsight, what I should have done was accept that I wasn't feeling too great and kind of floated through the day, willing to let the anxious feelings and symptoms stay if they wanted to - instead I tried to fight them and it only made me worse, to the point where I was too scared to leave the house by myself. I'm still too afraid to go in big shopping centres alone because I always feel overwhelmed and light headed, but I'm finally beginning to understand that I am anxious because my nerves are shot and to get better I have to stop feeding the fire with more worry. How is more worry going to help when all my mind and body want to do is take a rest from all that shit? Hope this helps. Xxxx

[GrrOLA]

Today was the second day I struggled to get out the front door. It's like there is a sharp pain in my heart telling me that it's "safer" inside the house. I feel like every insecurity that is typically not a big deal is intensified by the idea of leaving. But I agree with you, I don't want to describe this as agoraphobia either.

I wish I could afford to take a day off but school doesn't really allow for that.