Reaching out

[Laluna]

Good morning,

Long time no hear. I have been doing well, but now it's back. I don't know why. I haven't had any anxiety episodes for a long time, exept after drinking too much (reasonable punishment). A couple of months ago I started to have them after even one drink, that's when I gave up drinking altogether and I haven't had a drink since. Now they come just randomly, but almost always at night. I wake up with my heart racing and it takes me forever to go back to sleep.
Sometimes it's just the heart racing thing, sometimes they come with the horrible thoughts, usually evolving around me doubting that I'm a good mum, although I know I do a pretty good job raising my 2 year old very demanding toddler.
I can't afford to loose too much sleep, as I said, looking after my little monkey is full on.
This totally sucks, what do I do, where is this all going.
In any case, tomorrow is going to be a shit day, been awake for nearly 4 hours already..
Thanks for reading.

[raggamuffin]

I wonder if, afetr the panic returned a bit from drinking, the avoidance behaviour to remain safe made you think to yourself that the anxiety was going to return and therefore allowing the emotion, fear, worry etc start creeping back into your life. i've never woken with such symptoms but i've had them countless times during the day. It must be harder to calm yourself down having woken up in such a state, but remember to focus on breathing. Deep breath in, pause for a moment and exhale for as long as possible. Remind yourself it's only anxiety, you're not in danger. Try 20 breaths. Maybe next to a window, or outside. Get some fresh air. Get a glass of water, distract yourself for a while. The more times it occurs, the more it can take hold. But in reality the more of a "case file" it should build for you to accept it is just anxiety and that it's not something sinister or anything that's going to hurt you. The body reacts in many strange ways when we're under stress or feeling anxious.

I hope you feel better soon.

Ed

[Laluna]

Don't think it's got much to do with quitting drinking.
I'd love to do the slow breathing, but I'm just too tired. I'm on the verge of falling asleep, but can't sleep .
Got a massive headache too, panadol not working. Feeling sick. Hubby away, no one there to help out with my son. Can see myself at hospital emergency tomorrow, really don't know what to do. Son is already stirring, I've only had 2 hours sleep and feel like shit.

[SunnieDebris]

Laluna, I'm sorry that you're going through this. It sounds like you have no one but your husband to help you. Are there other moms who could watch your child for a few hours, or maybe the grandparents? If you can, watch some deep breathing exercise on YouTube, or there are apps for them, when you have time to sit through them and pick one that works for you. I have one that's a 20 minute exercise, and I'm usually asleep by minute 2. If you feel like you need to, then go to the emergency department. They may be able to give you something to help you sleep. Then follow up with your regular doctor as soon as you are able. He/she needs to know you are having trouble.

[Laluna]

Thanks guys.
I actually phoned the nurse on call service this morning, then got transferred to a gp. He's recommended seeing a doctor this morning. That would be a 20 drive though, not keen on that.
The headache has been getting worse, and apparently I've been taking too many panadol, so will be switching to aspirin.
So we'll try and get through the day somehow. No sleep now for me til my son's nap time now. It's gonna be a long day.

[Laluna]

Will definitely look into some videos or apps, sounds really interesting and I'm sure will come in handy in the future.
In the meantime, my little monkey and I will spend the morning in bed watching kids tv. Headache is easing off, which is such a relief. Aspirin working probably and I also had a coffee (read it might help with headaches).
Seems the anxiety this time was triggered by the physical symptoms. No idea what it is, by now I'm guessing migraine of sorts. Getting better though, can honestly say I haven't felt so sick in a long time, with a really odd mix of symptoms.

Thanks again for taking the time to read and reply. You guys are gold.

[SunnieDebris]

Anxiety can definitely be triggered by physical discomfort. I hope your day got better.

[alankay]

Yes anxiety for sure. Alankay