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View Full Version : Am I just maladjusted?



Invalidcharactr
09-11-2012, 11:27 PM
My fiance says that the only time he's ever seen me happy was when I was unemployed. I've never had a job that I didn't absolutely loathe, and I can't imagine a job/life that doesn't make me a ball of stress and misery.

At least not a respectable one, anyway.

Unfortunately, I have a perfectly respectable degree for a perfectly respectable job that involves a lot of perfectly respectable little tasks.

Going in to work in a quiet, dull little office is the equivalent of having someone shrieking in my face about... say... the history and manufacture of staples and staple accessories. It's an assault; it's almost painful in its sensory manifestations, but it's utterly banal and tedious. I guess frantic tedium is a good way of describing a job.

I'm an adult. I should be past all of this, but I utterly resent having to go in every day. The ride to work leaves my jaw clenched and my neck sore in anticipation of hours and hours of being utterly and completely held hostage to my need to pay rent. There's no getting up and eating when you're hungry; you have to wait until an arbitrary and non-biologically determined time to consume food. At least I can use the bathroom and get a drink of water whenever I feel like it, but that's pithy comfort when I'm shivering in hideous air conditioning and listening to my stomach growl at 10 in the morning.

I have to be up in a matter of hours, and just writing this has made me tense.

I'm sick of the derealization and my stress-dependent lack of short-term memory.

Sometimes I wonder if it's just genetically predetermined and I will just be either miserable or a screw-up. (This isn't how I feel all or even most of the time). My parents are both addicts and my mother's been in and out of more mental hospitals than I can recall. My father never spoke more than a few words to us at a time (unless he was drunk or high), which leads me to suspect that he was so socially inept that he required substances in order to man up enough to even speak to children. My grandmothers were schizophrenic (father's side) and co-dependent (mother's side). I don't know anything about my father's father, except for the fact that when he visited us he never said anything beyond "hello," and my mother's father was an overgrown child who was prone to fits of explosive rage and irrational behavior.

I don't want to take medication for this, since my fiance tells me that I blame medication or physical issues of mine for my flaws, instead of just recognizing my flaws as signs of weakness to be eradicated.

The eradication is the difficult part, since I'm not always entirely sure what is correct/normal and what is disordered. I know that anxiety isn't normal, but how can I force my brain to relinquish its stupid habits?

dazza
09-12-2012, 01:02 AM
Nah, you're not maladjusted - you're just pre-occupied with negativity which happens to manifest as a grudge towards work.

As long as there's bad "stuff" in your head, you'll continue to be this way so you need to make a plan to address this "stuff".

I don't recommend getting high on meds. everyday, since these just put you in an unreal state imo.

You have a rather unusual family history! this is clearly the source of your problems.
Have you ever talked to a therapist about this? - I suggest this is the way forward for now.

Invalidcharactr
09-12-2012, 07:20 AM
Therapists are morons for the most part. One of them gave me a rock and called it a "smile stone." I have no idea what I was supposed to do with his little rock, but he seemed inordinately pleased with the pun. Others have no clue what to do and give me a look of panic when I bring up anything real or important. They're used to dealing with little Jimmy's anger problem and Captain CEO's fear of success. They crumble when they have to talk about anything more substantial than that.

Also, fighting with my insurance and getting pre-approval to be sent in for approval to be filled out and faxed from one office to your mom is more hassle than it's worth. They set it up that way so you'll give up trying to get them to pay for anything. And on the off chance that everything works and you're approved, you have to drive an hour and a half to find someone who's in network because the network they chose is based out of a town two hours away. To save money, of course.

My fiance says that I should just stop being broken, but I require more concrete steps to repairing my inadequacies. Therapists have tried to talk to me about beaches and bull, which really only serves to irritate me. When they try to get me to close my eyes and be silent or whatever, it irks me because if I wanted to sit around and be silent, I wouldn't be paying someone to sit in the room with me. I've got things I want to say (as you can tell by the length of my posts), and someone trying to get me to be still and quiet just feels like they're trying to shut me up to make their jobs easier.

I've had other therapists outright refuse to talk about my underlying issues/ptsd stuff because it made him uncomfortable.

They also expect things to take too much damned time. Tomorrow doesn't exist. If someone tells me that I'll wake up tomorrow and be completely better, I want to know why I can't be better this instant. And they're talking about two or three months until my inadequacies and flaws are eradicated. They might as well be talking about ten million years because I have no concept of two or three months. That won't exist because it doesn't exist. This is something that needs to be done now.

I just can't find the correct switch.

Enduronman
09-12-2012, 07:44 AM
BAAAHHAAAAAHAAA!! Thx for the LMAO in the am bruh!!! Therapists are morons, here..have a smile stone!! Inordinately pleased!!! Captain CEO!! dude..welcome..

Enduronman.

Invalidcharactr
09-13-2012, 12:45 PM
I actually think I enjoy being mistaken for male. Next time I join anything anonymous, I think I might keep up the charade...

Enduronman
09-13-2012, 05:57 PM
That would be quite self-entertaining, self-fulfilling, self-indulgent, and extremely humorous too!! Do it!!! :)