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View Full Version : Thinking out loud



FedUp
09-08-2012, 08:18 PM
A post in here started me thinking... I think I have an idea as to where my anxiety has come from. I get anxiety if I have to confront someone ( I am a supervisor so that stinks), when I am in a crowded place and when I think someone is upset with me. After I sat down and really thought about all of this I think it is coming from all of the abuse that I have witnesses and the abuse that was inflicted upon me during my life. I was young when my dad left ( only 5), but he was very abusive towards my mother. Although I don't remember it clearly, I do remember bits and pieces. I stayed with my grandparents a lot growing up while my mom went to work. I remember clearly one night watching my grandpap pushing my grandma around through a mirror. I was suppose to b in bed sleeping. As I was growing up and had different boyfriends in school, there was abuse from them. I then got married and was in a physical, emotional and mentally abusive marriage. Took me ten years to get out. I am with a great man now... Finally... But I find that when we argue I get anxiety. It's like I am just waiting to get pushed around or something. We have been together for 8 years and there has never been any abuse at all, but it just triggers something. Now the question is where do I go from here to stop this anxiety?!? I don't take meds. I use to take Prozac but got off of it when I decided to have a child. I only get anxiety every once in awhile so I can usually get through it ok. I have no insurance so therapy is out. I do get anxiety on interstates but I am working on that. I know that this came from my brother in law getting killed while on one 4 years ago. Hmmm....

agraves911
09-10-2012, 11:38 PM
I know you said that you don't take meds, but maybe you could try them again. The meds I'm on don't effect me in any way accept that my anxiety has decreased. Btw I'm on lexapro.

dazza
09-11-2012, 01:36 AM
Blimey - a familiar story.

Flash-backs of past, bad relationships often continue to haunt people, well into new relationships... often many years after.

Just a tiny argument can trigger the fear of experiencing the same trauma as you once did.

Absolutely text-book anxiety me old love.

No matter what your original trauma or current state, you should follow the usual treatments - such as cognetive therapy, the occasional meds (for emergencies) and so on.

You'll get past it all. Takes time.

FedUp
09-13-2012, 07:51 PM
I have thought about getting back on meds. I don't think I need a daily one because most days I am okay. The whole no insurance thing is a pain in the butt though! I only go to the doctors every two years for a work physical because of the cost. As far as therapy... I would love to go but no insurance. Well maybe someday I will have insurance and be able to rid of this once and for all! Just glad that i can usually make it through my attacks ok and I have a great support person at home!