Fear of fear coming back

[squiggy72]

Hi, I'm new here. 11 years ago I became agoraphobic. For three years I led an indoor life, dragging myself out of the frontdoor for a short, what seemed like miles of a, walk to enter the house via the backdoor. I slowly progressed and when I finally took the step to actually see my new doc he suggested using medication as a support for my own tries to get through it.
Now, 8 years later I've flown across the ocean several times, had two wonderful jobs and am now starting a new one as teacher.
Yet, especially during summer breaks I get that old feeling back. I know I will probably not fall back to the early days of agoraphobia, but the fear of getting this fear back is ever present.
I joined to forum to give my support to those who'd like it, but also to talk to others about this fear and how to cope with this. I hope you want to communicate with me

Love,
Linda

[Bridgie]

Oh Linda! I am so happy for you! So don't keep us hanging, what medication worked for you?

:lol:

[squiggy72]

First of all, the medication is just supportive....

It's fluoxetine (that's what it's called in Holland). It's comparable with Prozac I think. It takes several weeks to get used to and you will loose control over your limbs etc for a while. Makes you feel like you're all drunk (goofy feeling). It regulates the serotonin release in the brain, since agoraphobia is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain.

The medication (one a day) surpresses the flee or fight impulses and gives you some peace to work on the phobia.
Next to the medication makes sure you have a good support system. For me it was my mom and a very good friend who believed in me no matter what.

For me, with the medication and after having a pretty impressive argument with a psychotherapist (only went 2 times) I felt confident enough to take matters back in my own hands.

I still was a long journey, but I would definately recommend medication such as fluoxetine. I need to take it for the rest of my life, but have found my peace with it. After all, people with diabetes also have to take medication.

I hope this helps a little.

[Quinn]

Maybe you could pick up a new trade? Start painting or learn to play an instrument you've always wanted to play. It sounds like being unproductive might bother you. Are you the type of person that constantly thinks about what you could be doing when you're not working? When exactly do these feelings become strongest? A certain time of day, a location, during a certain activity?

[squiggy72]

Hi Quin,

Yes, it's not easy for me to sit still. I have plenty to do, and although I'm somewhat of a private person I still thrive on social contacts. During summer breaks most friends are on vacation (and usually I am myself visiting friends), but sometimes these feelings pop up. Mostly when I'm not feeling too well. Each flu or each other physical inconvenience makes me doubt myself: is it really just a virus or is it the phobia acting up again.
It's just an insecurity, but it sure feels good talking about it.