Need advice or help

[Hollie]

I know this may sound stupid, but I've been experiencing the worst case of anxiety for over a week. It started last week at work, when my supervisor realized that I had not been doing the finances right. I've been in the position for a little over a year and I'm only there part time doing full time work, for not so great pay. After getting all the paperwork back from finance I realize I never fully settled one month and that is how everything got screwed up. I hadn't said anything yet until I have a proper look over all the paperwork. We had a slight argument because this wasn't apart of my job description and I was thrown into it. I started having a panic attack at work, but masked it. I can't stop obsessing over it and I just want out. I've been at home crying for over a week and I can't stop. My stomach hurts and I don't know what to do. I keep freaking out, I can't sleep, and I just don't know what to do.

My friend says the job is not worth it if its going to make me sick.

[Enduronman]

Hey Hollie!

This isn't the death of a Grandparent. It is an error...You've taken this error, that we all make, and are using it as a shovel to dig a hole..that you are already in.

1. Wad up the stupid TPS report summary and throw it out the window.
2. Go rent the movie "Office Space" and watch it.
3. Plan a meeting with any necessry personel that need be present, to discuss this issue openly. (Why? You're a human. You will make mistakes. If it weren't for mistakes, then no one would ever learn anything..we'd all be zombies.)
4. Take notes, make a presentation about this "human error".
5. "wasn't a part of my job description, but I was (sacrificed by someone else) thrown into it." Don't try to figure how who yet. Focus in gettin you put back together..
6. Jobs are very difficult to find now, especially if you're in the US. There are 1000's of college grads with degrees, and no jobs to find..Keep this one.

Fixing this issue, is way easier then searching, looking, trying to find another new (issue) job and start over..

I hate Lumberg..LOL!

Bye,
Enduronman,. :)

[Hollie]

Thanks Enduronman.
I love "Office Space" I wish I can find a hypnotist that can hypnotize me just to not care and just do my job. I tend to take things a bit far and I work myself up to the point of illness. Its just that there the is unknown that I am afraid of. I tend to avoid confrontation.
I know I made a mistake and I will fix it despite me getting into a confrontation or not. I am prepared to take responsibility for my part. The thing is that it might cost me my job and I have come to terms with that. I have stuck it out with this place with no raise until I got this position and I am a bit stubborn to quit.
You can say I needed to let what I was holding in, out. This was the breaking point among other problems I am experiencing at the moment. Its been a bad couple of years for me. I'm trying to make the best of it though.
I loved that you said to focus on me getting put back together, I am working on that and I appreciate that you said that. Its hard and I have a lot of fear that prevents me from doing a lot of things. I guess I just wanted someone to listen and help me put things into perspective. I think that's what happens when you suffer from anxiety, much of your perspective is blurred.


Thanks Again,
Hollie