New to this.. seeking some advice

[Daniel1990]

Hello all, I'm new to this. I'm at my wits end with my anxiety at the minute so thought I'd join here as I've read really good advice. When I was about 15, I had a panic attack after smoking weed and freaked out over it, causing anxiety all the way up to I was 17. I rode the storm basically and aside from the odd tension headache, my life was anxiety free and since then I had been the confident friendly funny person I was always was, all up too march of this year. The months leading to this included moving from home to my aunties after a family argument with my dad, on top of splitting with my girlfriend and real stress at work. I was getting my haircut after a weekend of stress at work when I felt uncomfortable and the panic attack feelings came back, I freaked out completely and ran out panicking. For the next two-three weeks, I avoided everything socially aside from work and began suffering from them there and even at home. I gave in and spent two months off, mostly sat at home stuck with depressing thoughts and panicking when I left the house. I finally plucked up the courage to get back in work and for the first couple of weeks I began feeling better until the panicking over my anxious thoughts returned. Its got to the stage where I avoid places, hate the bus into work, panic walking from the stop to work then panic when I'm in work over my thoughts! Its got so bad I'm panicking about things like looking at myself in the mirror, that my heads not able to handle my feelings and that I'm scared of what I've become.. Can anyone relate to this? Even half an hour classes with a councillor going over cognitive behaviour isn't working!

[Enduronman]

Dan,

Welcome.

Yup, can we relate? Yes. Was it terrifying? Yes. Is there a way out? Yes.. Considering you're NEW to this, yer blessed. Many of us carried this around in our pockets for 3 or 4 DECADES.. You strike back early, quickly, and dont look back..and you'll succeed. You accidently (no room for accidents or errors, none) look back 1 time, and it'll pull you right back in. Then it becomes twice as hard to get back out..I NEVER looked back, or made 1 tiny slip up, because if I would have then I wouldn't be sitting in my own kitchen, looking at this screen, as a free man and not incarcerated for a long time if not forever, and able to be a successful, normal, person, parent, grandparent. All of that would not exist, nor be possible to acheive if I had looked back, and failed..The last posted thread that I put up on the forum has a purpose. I know why I put that up there, even though it has 0 to do with anxiety (on the surface that anyone can see) but if you read into it then you'll see how I was forced to train myself to think a certain way. I had to immediately re-train the way I thought, in order to keep me out of trouble of all sorts, varieties, levels...I don't care if anyone hear can understand it, but I offer it to them to try to comprehend because its very useful to me and could also be to them..once they figure it out. I had too, real fast..no choice. If you or anyone else does read it, as stupid as it may look and alot of people will scratch their heads like WTF is this and why would we care?...Because, I'm always 2 steps ahead of any decisions that I or anyone around me makes and I "see" the potential, possibility, and repercussions of their oh so simple answers. Whether yes, or no, or maybe, or if yes then why, or if no then why?...Heck I can even explain to them what is going to happen if they do or dont,..and they make their own decision to do, when I told them what's going to happen when they did!..Then I get into trouble for it..LMAO!!!..You know what though? At least I TRIED TO WARN THEM... I did my part..they screwed it all up, not ME!!!...haaahhaaahaa!!! No, I'm not insane..not yet anyway. :)

1. Wits end with anxiety.
2. Read good advice.
3. Smoking weed, high anxiety!...duh!
4. Headache.
5. March=moved=family arguement=DAD=breakup=work stress load=panic===A TON OF TRAUMA, ALL AT 1 TIME...Heavy load.
6. Social anxiety=avoiding people.
7. Therapist=trying to get inside....futile.

Dan,

I do not see in here at any point where you mention a visit to a PHD,..MD,..Dr...???? Am I missing something? No family Dr, no visit, no medications to get you STABILIZED BEFORE RUNNIN OFF AND JUMPIN INTO A THERAPY SESSION WITH A PERSON THAT ONLY KNOWS WHAT THEY'VE LEARNED OUT OF A BOOK OR CLASSROOM ENVIRONMENT AND BEEN EDUCATED AND TRAINED ON THE POSSIBLE WAYS TO GET INSIDE YOUR HEAD BUT THEY'RE DOING THE BEST THEY CAN BUT...THEY'VE NEVER WALKED IN YOUR SHOES OR THOUGHT YOUR THOUGHTS OR MORE THEN LIKELY NEVER EXPERIENCED TRAUMA OTHER NORMAL PEOPLE TYPES OF TRAUMA AND EVERYDAY AVERAGE PEOPLE TYPES OF ANXIETY BECAUSE THEY GOT STUCK IN TRAFFIC FOR 3 MINUTES???????...

Sorry,..IED..I'm good bruh..

I must take a breather..process what you see for a few if you will.

to be cont.

E-Man.....