Need support

[pawlowski187]

I'm not in the healthiest relationship and I am afraid that once I leave I'll be hit with panic ... I know being in this relationship is not the best for my disorder anyways... But I'm dealing with a catch 22... Need support from someone maybe whose found the straingth to leave... Thanks Tiffany

[Christian78]

I'm not in the healthiest relationship and I am afraid that once I leave I'll be hit with panic ... I know being in this relationship is not the best for my disorder anyways... But I'm dealing with a catch 22... Need support from someone maybe whose found the straingth to leave... Thanks Tiffany

I had the same dilemma, but actually found it easier when I left.
I had total control of my life again, without having to answer to somebody else.
I was surprised, because I was dreading the worst!

[Enduronman]

Good morning Super Mod, 187, 78!..

Couple of thoughts as I see this quite regularly. First off, before you make any rash, brash, regretful, or harsh decisions that could potentially create yet more trauma, fear, panic, and remorse for yourself in the rest of your remaining future..You've got some questions to answer and not to us, to YOU.

1. Why do you perceive this relationship as not being healthy? Is it because of YOU or HIM?...It takes 2 people to f**k a relationship up, not just 1...You must be honest with yourself and when you do figure out the answer to this question then realize, accept, and understand that placing blame, guilt, or fault on another person whether in mind, actions, or words isn't going to change a friggin thing...so, answer this first one and then assess WITHOUT speech. Period..
2. Why do you think that being in this relationship isn't the best for this disorder anyways?.. Is it because of the condition that you carry around with YOU or is HE the one that's feeding and fueling this fire with Funny Car fuel???.. I see this daily also. Be honest, with YOURSELF. Period.
3. What IS the Catch 22 and what does it REALLY mean?? The main point here is, that if you now begin planning your LIFE "around" this annoying and frustrating condition of your mental state in present day..Then thats exactly HOW this f**kin disorder grows and blossoms! It will go from anxiety, to general anxiety, to performance anxiety, to social anxiety, to extreme panic, to f**kin agoraphobia whereas virtually every living, breathing minute of every routine day suddenly becomes an enormous f**kin challenge just to plan, organize, or schedule..A simple walk out the door and across the street to get a newspaper for fear of...NOTHING, NO ONE, ANY REAL THREAT AT ALL...

Theres my SUPPORT system..and I dont need search for strength as that isnt one of my weak points but yet even I also have weak points and I seek to strengthen them every single day, just like EVERYONE else.

You think this is tough? Wait until I have my 2nd cup of coffee...:)

Enduronman.

[pawlowski187]

Ok here goes... First off . I would not leave because of my disorder , regardless of all the fucked up shit in our relationship, one thing is he is supportive when it comes to helping me with my panic attacks. I don't let panic make drastic decisions in my life for me ... Besides maybe the occasional trip to the er :)

Yes it takes two to mess up a relationship but I have changed my own way of life to attemp to create a better relationship, he on the other hand has not. I'm 29 he's 33 and I'm over my party drug stage. He on the other hand is not.

When I met him there was allot I did not know about his life. Now everything has come out of the woodwork .

He has 4 children, I have 2. I treat his like my own and he has a problem treating mine like his. But right now I don't have many options as to we're I can go and start over. I just finished school so I'm unemployed as of now . My family does not live close and my car is his, do Yaeh

I'm a live in maid and housewife who barely ever gets acknowledged . I'm strong, attractive and worth so much more . I just don't know how to get there .... But anyways that sums some of it up without completely airing my dirty laundry out there

[Enduronman]

Well done! (NOTICE: Within the first paragraph I capitalized 1 word...What was that 1 word?..YOU!) No, I'm not being a smartass but I know what I'm typing, thinking, looking for, and why...the sum of every possible equation in regards to anything related to "anxiety".

It is OK to "post yer dirty laundry" around here because that is how you actually get to the ROOT of the problems to begin with..TRANSPARENCY=HEALING.

Post as you wish, whatever it takes, whatever direction or path you choose to take. That is how you answer your own questions...Get it?..

Others that read these post, are looking at them from the outside/in...whereas you are looking at them from the inside/out... Get it?

By answering your own questions, within what was obviously poorly planned on MY part, in your OWN mind...You are planning your exit strategy and escape.

I just wanted you to recognize ALL the variables BEFORE you walked out that door, and then began to 2ND GUESS YOUR OWN DECISION IN THE FUTURE..Get it?

I'm not very complicated to understand, its just APPEARS that way to many...LOL!!!

Great job here PLOWINGYERWAYTHEF**KOUTTAHERE 187!

Best wishes,

Enduronman. :)