New member - please help - please read

[Aussiejim]

Hi All,
My name is Jimmy. I'm a 35 year old Australian. Thank God I found this sight. There may be somebody out there who understands. Who has an answer... I have suffered from Anxiety all my life. I was a bed wetter as a child, scared of school and being teased, scared every day my Mum would leave(Dad left when I was 1). By teen years it was fear of losing my girlfriend. By adulthood and through to now the terrible terrible health anxiety. I have been scared of and convinced I had over the years...brain tumours, prostate cancer, bowel cancer, throat cancer, lung cancer, als and more. I have spent thousands on chasing re-assurance that i don't have these things. I have put my wife through years of financial and mental stress.
Recently the worst fears of my life have struck. My mother was diagnosed at 70 with lewy body dementia . She has exhibited symptoms since about 66. It has cut her down to a broken confused and sad old woman and she can't put two words together and cries at the halucinations she gets. Going through this with her for 2 years I have had the worst sleep patterns. I have woken up with screams ready to fight, have jumped physically onto my partner, have punched out and tried to throw snakes off myself. A while ago I had the most terrible dream my partner was being raped. I cocked my arm for the most almighty punch on the man and the force of the punch into thin air woke me up. This we put down to stress. Recently I have been lead to believe though that this is RBD or REM SLEEP DISORDER. This is all it could be because when you dream you are supposed to be parylized and with the disorder you aren't.
I wasn't that concerned until I read all the studies saying REM DISORDER and parkinsons and LEWY BODY DEMENTIA are linked and 30 - 60% of people with REM disorder will have dementia or parkinsons follow. They also say that it is a sign of brain stem deterioration. So it looks like Lewy body dementia may be hereditary and if the studies I read are correct I may have it before 50.
I'm scared, terrified and lost. Off my food and my wife wants to leave because this has caused me to be terrified 24 hours a day and no longer the confident man she fell in love with. I wish to be normal. To live each day with confidence my wife and I can grow old together but instead I beleive I'll be out of my mind before I'm even grey.
If you have ever ever felt like this and you understand please help. I feel like giving up.

JIMMY

[cat eyes]

Hi Jimmy,

I have been going through the same thing. I swear I have every illness and been to do many doctors and blood tests. I google everything and I am afraid of side effects from the medicine I was given. It stinks!! I just want to be normal and have my life back. I get dizzy, vision distorted and heart papiltations. It's really scary!!

[edyta]

Hi, it sounds like you suffer from hypochondria please read up on it as this can help you understand way you feel or think the way you do, I suffer from the same thing. It can make others around you go mad wen you always think something bad is happening to you, like cancer or heart attack stroke name it. Maybe something happened wen you were a kid that you need to deal with? I know that wen I was a child my mum never cared for me wen I was sick and the fear of some one not helping me if I was to get sick was just scary for me. I was told ones from a doctor that I was lucky I did not die as The hormone cued given me blood poisoning I hade a mola pregnancy and after that my life was just up side down, I started to get very depressed and was thinking something very bad was going to happen 2 me like cancer or a heart attack or that I never cued get pregnant ex. But every time I went to the Dr. All my blood test was fine, and I was always nervous to get my results back from the Dr. and I still 2 day have this Anxiety but I have helped my self understanding way I feel like this and i try not to bother my husband 2 much whit all my symptoms or he wold go mad and if something was 2 go wrong he wold think its just my anxiety talking. It's very hard 2 cure this hypochondria but you can try to help your self by getting information on it and maybe try to convince your self that your ok and stop reding on Internet regards to all the symptoms your experiencing as this makes your anxiety worse and you will feel the symptoms of anxiety that can make you very stressed out, and you will get symptoms from it. if it's very bad I do recommend you to talk to your GP as medication can help (antidepressant) I really hope you get help soon and I hope your wife understands you and that things can only get better from now on. I always say 2 my self it's ok if I get sick it's out of my control and if I was to die sow be it, way stress a but it now wen I am well, We all have to go one day it's ok but today I am healthy And well :). Good luck Edyta78

[cat eyes]

I bother my husband and family with this to the point they r frustrated with me. I complain all the time and everywhere I go. This anxiety is killing me. I do take medicine but I don't think it helps much. Too many symptoms and then u think u r dying.

[drksydeone]

My name is Will, 41 years old and have struggled with both anxiety and depression for the past twenty years. I can tell you through years of educating myself with this condition that what you both suffer from is nothing more than a bad thinking habit that has become part of your belief. Check out a eye opening book by Sam Obitz called "been there, done that, do this. It has been life changing. It's a quick read. Sam recounts his personal struggles with both anxiety and depression and uses a wonderful thought changing tool called tea forms. Basically you write down any thought you may have, identify the thinking error ( there are 10 of them) then counter that thought. TEA. This will get you moving in a great direction.

[cat eyes]

Thnx for the info. R u ok now?

[drksydeone]

Define ok. Just kidding. I have developed a terrible thinking habit for a long time and like anything that you practice, I perfected it. It was not working for me but I didn't know any different. I was taking Zoloft for a long time along with Xanax. I just wanted more than a band aid for the problem both of which served fine. I wanted to change my thinking. The tea forms are a great tool to really see how detrimental your thinking can be and by changing the station your tuning into can greatly affect your quality of life. I'm still working on me everyday. But I'm finally seeing that I was the cause of my feelings. I spent years blaming everyone but me. Accepting ownership is the first step. Good luck and keep me posted on your progress. Check out SAMs book.

[drksydeone]

To answer your question yes I'm doing a great deal better. Thank you. What you put in is what you get out. I can easily fall back into my old thinking habits but I recognize the triggers alot quicker and don't stay there as long. Borrowing the words of Sam Obitz. life's 10% what happens & 90% how you react to it.

[cat eyes]

I am so afraid to take the Xanax. I google everything and swear I have every side effect. I feel many symptoms like passing and I am gong to die. I am driving my family crazy and been to a lot of drs and many trips by ambulance to the er. This shit sucks!

[drksydeone]

Like I said 90% how we react. Your hypochondriasis is part of your anxiety. I was the same way about medication but at times really needed it to help me get my emotional level manageable. The tea form takes dedication but in time think you will see the errors of your thinking.
T
I am having a heart attack.

E
Reality filter, emotional blocking, blowing things out of proportion

A
No I'm not having a heart attack. I heard a story on the news and it upset me. That's all. I have felt this before and this is part of a bad thinking behavior that I conditioned. No more. I know this will pass as it always does.

That's an example of a tea form. Instead of chasing you tail you counter the thought. It takes practice but is effective.

[cat eyes]

I am going to look for the book. I see a talk therapist to learn cbt. I just spending a lot of money on drs and the er.

[drksydeone]

You can find the book at tao3.com

[cat eyes]

Ok thank u. How much?

[drksydeone]

I am also working with someone via phone. Been working very well. I think the book is less than 15$.

[cat eyes]

Not a bad price. Who do u work with via phone? A therapist? How much??

[drksydeone]

Hey cats eyes. I actually work with Sam himself. He's really great. Just has such an understanding of this condition. Kind of pricey but well worth it. I've never been able to work with a therapist more than a month. The fact that he has overcome this is what draws me in the most. Glad to tell you my story anytime. Hope this helps.

[cat eyes]

Thank you!! I would love to overcome this. I get scared when I get heart flutters and feel like fire crackers are in my heart. Did u experience this?

[drksydeone]

Hey cat. Yes I had this. I think I've have experience every part of anxiety. Just try not to give your feelings any power. Try floating through this sensation. Have you ever tried to give yourself the feelings of an anxiety attack. Breathing through a straw etc. I think if you don't let the physical symptoms overwhelm you then they won't seem so debilitating. Say," I've felt this way before and it always leads me to feeling tired. I'm not going to have a heart attack I'm just overreacting to something that upset me. No big deal. Flow." it's much better stopping the thought rather than entertain it.

[cat eyes]

I always fight the attacks and think I am dying. I am always calling my doctor or going to the er. It stinks.

[drksydeone]

Don't run and fight your attacks. It's only strengthening them. Remind yourself that you know what this is and will soon pass. Flow like a river.

[cat eyes]

You are right but they are so scary. I hate the flutters and the feeling like I am going to pass out or die. Made many trips to er and drs office. I take meds but I google everything and afraid of the side effects.

[drksydeone]

You can find evidence in anything if you allow yourself to keep digging. Headache, brain tumor indigestion, heart attack, going crazy, all of the above. I had it all. Truth is what good are you getting out of doing this to yourself. This is a bad thinking habit you have reinforced. Counter these thoughts.

[cat eyes]

You are so right. I like the way you think. Thank you for your support and help.

[krissy20k]

Hi guys I am new here. I suffer greatly from anxiety and panic attacks. I have spurts where it tends to take over my life.

I agree with drksydeone. I have never used the tea form, but I have been using similar steps to help cope with my anxiety. I think I am going to get that book by Sam Obitz . Sounds good!

[krissy20k]

Cat Eyes - I am in the same shoes as you! I have been to the ER so many times thinking I was going to die. Just a couple weeks ago I woke up in the middle of the night with my heart racing, felt like I was gasping for air, dizzy, numb, cold, shaking - I thought it was the end of me. Currently, I am going to all sorts of doctors. All of my tests from the cardiologist are coming back just fine. I recently started taking Xanax; a very low dose (.25mg). It helps take the edge off. I do not feel as anxious anymore. I don't even have any side effects from the Xanax. I know it is not a permanent solution, but until my appointment with a therapist (finally), I am going to use it as needed to help cope. Why suffer when there is help out there! I am going to reclaim my life. I am not letting this take over me anymore! I want to try yoga and meditation. I hear it works wonders! :) Hope you feel better!! It's good to be able to share experiences on here because not many people understand what we go through!

[cat eyes]

Krissy20k check your private messages I sent u one

[drksydeone]

Krissy. I know the book will be very beneficial towards your establishing a new habit. Because first thing I changed with me was referring to this as my condition. We don't have a condition. We have a bad thinking habit. SAMs book is a great place to start. Let me know if I can answer any questions for you.