How to deal with things beyond my control!

[laurandisorder]

So, I have been doing pretty well with this anxiety beast lately. Finished up work, made speeches in front of the whole staff and even went out afterwards today and remained relatively anxiety free.

But it's not my job that's the problem, in fact sometimes my job is what keeps me from going bonkers.

My partner and I have been having some long term issues that we are working through. I got him to agree to go to counseling to help with my anxiety, but he doesn't want to see anyone about his own depression issues. His choice.

Anyway, my parents and partner have a strained relationship. It makes it very difficult for me not to get anxious pending situations where they cross paths. Tomorrow; good Friday breakfast. I'm already anxious about the long drive to my folks because I get mad driving related panic attacks. I'm really scared my partner will bail at the last minute. It has happened before. A lot.

We have been doing pretty well lately and I am terrified he is going to let me down and I'll have to face another family get together alone, or worse that I won't make the drive at all and then I'll let my family down.

There is nothing I can do to assert control over this situation and it has me highly stressed and anxious.

How can I stop anxiety going into overdrive when it is over circumstances that are out of my control?

Any advice appreciated.

(have a great Easter break folks)

Laur

[knp]

I have been using l theanine for mental calmness
Inositol for physical anxiety and also take b complex that is my happy pill hope this help

Be brave

[mccallie]

I have very similar anxiety. I always have to be in control and if I'm not or I don't have a set plan I start to have an attack. My significant other is very laid back and you would think that he would help me relax but sometimes I wonder if he makes me worse. I feel like I do the worrying for both of us.

Hope you have a relaxing Easter Break!

Christy

[laurandisorder]

Yeah my partner is the same! He's so laid back, he's pretty much horizontal.

And as with much of my worry, it turned out to be pointless. I drove there and back with minimal anxiety and he got along fine with my folks!

[anxiousmess]

i'm pleased everything went well for you :)

somebody once told me "you can't control everything! concentrate on what you can control"

you can't control the way you boyfriend is, but you can control the way you handle the situation!

my issue was over my son seeing his dad - his dad is never interested. i was getting myself all worked up constantly, trying to get them together and failing everytime. this was causing extreme anxiety, and anger.
once i was able to focus on what that person told me, and actually accept it and work on it - life became so much easier!
he still doesn't see his dad - his dad is an asshole. but, i concentrate solely on what I can do for my son - i don't care what his dad does anymore!

it has also worked on other things too :)