Welcome to the Anxiety Forum - A Home for Those with Anxiety, Fear, or Panic Attacks.
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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by johnmawson View Post

    You've laid out all of the puzzle pieces right there, in perfect order! All you need to do is put them together

    You say you're fine at work, when busy and around people
    You know that we can overcome anxiety when we "need" too.
    You are bad when you're at home with down-time.
    *And anxiety meds have made it worse in the past, plus you don't want to be on them.

    What I suggest, and I have a big long section in my book on it, is that you make a schedule.
    You DON'T need to be working all day and night through following a schedule, and you can even schedule plenty of things for relaxation, fun and enjoyment.

    This is what I personally would do, and it may be of help to you.

    Get a piece of paper and pen and write out all the things you NEED to do in a day, and what times you need to do them.
    (Wake up, eat, go to work, come home, shower etc etc etc.) Be thorough with it.
    Where you see gaps of time, fill these gaps in with something: Watching TV, go on a walk, cook, read, socialize (whatever you would like. But try get yourself doing things that you know will occupy yourself enough to stop the anxiety.)
    When you've got a schedule ready, follow it as best as you can each day, and see how that goes.
    If your schedule is too hard and rigorous, simply take out a few things and replace them with easier to do activities/chores, such as instead of going on a 8 mile walk each day, go on a 30minute walk and use the remaining time to stretch or have a snack etc.

    I personally found that when I was occupied throughout the day, even facing my fears when I was facing them, that anxiety simply didn't have enough room to occupy my mind!
    It's impossible to think of two things at the same time, or feel 2 (opposite) emotions at the same time. (* try picturing the statue of liberty and then in detail remember what you ate last night for dinner) You'll find you can only go between the two (even if it is fast enough to seem like their the same time) but you can never truly think of both...Well if you can, you're a super savant and I envy you

    It sounds to me like this could help you. Let me know if you need ideas to fill your downtime with.
    I have a massive list of things I do and did
    Yes it's strange. It's like I know the pieces but just can't seem to accomplish them. Lol. I am a worrier. I worry about everything. Exp my kids and money. It's the thoughts of fear that get to me. The fears of something being wrong with me, the fears of keeping my kids safe etc. my kids are 23, 18 and soon to be 4. Lol. My oldest graduated from radiology school and the middle is in 12 th grade. They are doing very good but I worry all the time about there safety. I know I can't control what happens in this world but its hard for me. I can get anxious about going to my job. I have been there 11 yrs and love the staff and my boss! So why do I do that? I worry about what I have to do the next day, even if its having fun going somewhere with my little one. I am always thinking to much and saying ok tomorrow I have to do this and this and this etc. or tomorrow I have nowhere to go Yey! But then I worry about all the house work. It's never ending for me. It's to the point where I am thinking ok, I have to get up tomorrow and get me ready the baby ready go to the store then to the bank etc. why can't I just go and do these things without thinking so hard of everything I have to do and just enjoy being out and take it one by one, step by step???

  2. #12
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    Try listening to this Audio series by Dale Carnegie.
    "How to stop worrying and start living."
    They're free on youtube
    and the first few CD's helped me out BIG time with my worries.

    My worries were of being sick. They were just like your thoughts, constant and never ending (and also very unnecessary)
    I have 2 more posts before I can post URL's so I will post it in 2-3 down

  3. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by johnmawson View Post
    Try listening to this Audio series by Dale Carnegie.
    "How to stop worrying and start living."
    They're free on youtube
    and the first few CD's helped me out BIG time with my worries.

    My worries were of being sick. They were just like your thoughts, constant and never ending (and also very unnecessary)
    I have 2 more posts before I can post URL's so I will post it in 2-3 down
    One More After this

  4. #14

  5. #15
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    Thank you, thank you!!!!. I will check these out tonight! So glad you figured out how to post links. Lol thanks for all your time and help!

  6. #16
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    I needed to make 25 posts before they let me post a link
    But at least I've made more than that many posts now

    Let me know how they work I really enjoyed them
    Dale is such a lovely guy, great personality and very well spoken

  7. #17
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    Jan 2013
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    THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH, I'm going to start trying the emotion thing, it seems like a fun way to get rid of anxiety One of the problems I have been having lately is when I over come a social anxiety fear, my brain finds another one the scare the crap out of me, but I have been going out with my friends more lately, when i dont think about anxiety i have a good time but whenever i get home from school, the anxiety starts and I get so scared. I am even scared about thinking of being scared, thank you guys for all your help, in fact, im spending time with my friends in about 30 minutes but I am really scared, so I'll try the emotion exercise and see if it helps.

  8. #18
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    Jan 2013
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    I really need help again, everything seems to be getting worse and worse. I have been avoiding social situations a lot lately and I feel like dieing. My friends are terrible and all they do is talk about smoking, drinking and things I'm not even interested in. Latley, my fear has been revolving around saying no to people which will give me extreme panic attacks when someone tells me to do something I don't want to do. This "friend" of mine is really weird and TRIES to make me feel bad which does not help my anxiety at all. I get so angry but I can't lash out at him because my anxiety gets too strong to even cope with. He think there is some sort of fucking popularity contest in my school and he tells me who he hangs out with every day while I stay a home all depressed. This gets my anxiety to the max and I get so scared its not even funny. Whenever he wants to hang out with me and i say my parents wont let me he will keep on telling me to ask them again and since it is so hard for me to say no i do and my parents get extremely mad when i do that and they go all crazy on me telling me to leave the house because i am a dissapointment My friend also comes to my house without telling me and tries to manipulate me into thinking that i told him to come at this time. One time I was leaving his house and it was snowing alot and my dad said he was waiting for me but his car was sliding down the hill so i needed to hurry up, i told my friend and he called me a liar and told my to stop lieing so he told me to stay at his house for another 10 minutes so i did. After that my dad got so pissed off at me. This friend had been causing me so much trouble but I don't know who to get away from him. Im scared to see him every time because he always gets mad at me.

  9. #19
    Yer mate sounds like an insecure prick, more of a bully than a friend. You gotta chanel yer frustation into tellin him to fuck off cuz yer nt his doormat. It will take courage bt I believe u have it in ya. It mite take a bit of time bt trust me u will snap cuz ya can only bottle fings up 4 so long, n the sooner the better cuz at the min yer frustration is only effectin u negativly. Jus keep tellin yerself u are a far better person than him and u deserve respect, in time you will find confidence, u dont need people like that in yer life donuts, hope yer keepin ok chum.

  10. #20
    I ended up a drunkin pill head because I couldnt cope from suppressin my anxiety, ended up with a criminal record from wen I finally stood up to bullys, nt good. Currently im clean bt the anxiety I was trying to escape is 10times wot it was, social phobia, scared to go out and generally jus an anxious mess. The lesson iv learnt is nt to suppress my feelings, find a healthy outlet like exercise, hobbies, and most importantly good company like true mates n family. Ther more fings get bottled up the worse its guna effect u. I found an anxiety management group through my gp that helped me understand my anxiety better which helps a wee bit

 

 

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