Peter Ross Anderson

[PeterAndersonIsARacist]

Awww, Peter has it come to this?
Am I the only one who acknowledges you?
You so desperately crave someone to talk at don't you, that even insults from strangers on the internet are preferable the vast miserable desolate emptiness of your life?
All those threads you start on the few forums you're not banned from: "0 Replies".

"Fatty boom boom"? Is that some self-deprecating humour - I'm kinda impressed, I didn't think you had that much metacognitive capacity to be honest. Have you been looking in a mirror recently (or do they all crack when you come near)?
You look like a fucking Mr Men mate.

I mean you've always had that reanimated-corpse vibe about you - but now it looks like you've been at the bottom of a lake for a few years and you're undergoing saponification and turning into a lump of adipocere (which ironically is as close to soap as you're likely to get). Seriously, I hear Capcom have been screenshotting your videos as reference material for NPC models for their next RE instalment - Resident Evil: Greendykes House. Unfortunately now you've deleted your channel again, they're just going to have to get a load of rancid badger cum, smear it on a turd, and use that as a substitute - I mean it's close enough, isn't it?

I'd tell you to fuck off back to... but who would you go to... I mean, Frank yeeted himself to 'Dundee', you've blocked your sister, your mum has had enough of your shite, your dad just wants to punch your lights out, Ponder's blocked you, that crazy jailbait's gone, and you've deleted your youtube channel (again) so you can't even scream into the void any more.
Honestly, sometimes it must feel like your life is just a colostomy bag filled with shite, and the seal has burst so it's just slowly leaking shite, dribbling down your side prolonging the pain.

But don't be downhearted by all this Peter - I sense a change coming.
I'm looking into the future, and I see a change of circumstances...
Yes a new place to live...
With three meals a day...
en-suite toilet..
a room mate (who may or may not try to set you on fire)...
Ohh! Nearly forgot! Stern men, and women in uniforms - you like that femdom shit don't you (remember not to try stalking them on social media this time though).
Top tip: if you pretend you're smuggling drugs they'll do a cavity search for you. Oh yeah baby.
You never know - if you maintain your normal level of obsessive ranting, you might even get a free trip to to see a dentist
Best of all if you want to take a beating, you won't have to pay anyone, you'll get all that sub/humiliation stuff for free. (You're probably getting excited about this already, aren't you - eyes glazing over as you stare at your phone as it sits on that wee blue elephant)
Most of all, you'll finally be somewhere you really fit in - have a sense of belonging. I feel like you'll really fit in and feel at home there.

And they have lightbulbs in all the sockets.