Time To Get Back Up Again

[Ponder]

Unsettling dream last night. All of a sudden It dawned upon me that my wife was gone. Slowly an image of a coffin came into being. More touching was how my grandson was missing her and I found myself in a predicament where I was asking my wife's ghost, if I should open her coffin or not to show the little one that Nan was gone for good? I struggled with what we might both see. The details and emotion was quite real. It seemed to be full on about loss and how I would handle grieving that with my grandson.

My summery likens that loss to a daughter who acts like she is dead to us, yet still lives while we pick up the pieces but seemingly remain powerless over that ongoing pain and loss. I obviously feel very deeply for my grandson (just as I do for my daughter ) as he heads of reluctantly and confused for a visit with his dad, whilst he grieving similar to me. If his autism is not enough - but to live life like so at only 5 years of age. I hold out for him as I know as long as we keep being there for him, he will come out the other side with still the urge to breathe. It is worrying though, how the system is so quick to ignore my wife's and I position in all this. The powers on the front lines quick to use us, but when lined by 4 walls, a grey wig and society's Almighty hammer - the only thing that then matters is authority.

I will always hate society!!!
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OK - Back into my games. This morning I sand box a proposed layout for cities skylines as I have been struggling in normal mode. I'll take that working layout and hook it up via my laptop on another monitor for reference whilst I later begin the task of creating it in normal mode on the new PC. Something like that.