Nursery? Was this whilst your careers where out working or whilst your carers where caring? I see it more as a form of institutionalization with the same negative impact as that endured by the undesirable. Moreover, a case where we ourselves fail to considered how we have actually been institutionalized. Just thinking from a systemic point of view which helps to see the bigger picture, thus making it easier to disassociate. In this light avoidance can be a good thing. Disidentify - no more shaming and blaming. None the less - crying in such terms is part and parcel to the release.
I'm kind of having a good bitch about the system / parents ... same thing. Objectivity is a bitch, but also a necessity! It's hard to win when people tell you not to have an ego in your drumming/making noise ... only to tell you to that your a pushover when being humble/kind. Damned if you do, damned if you don't!
I usually go to both extremes. I always find it good to disembowel myself before others attempt to do it for me. lol Dis-empowerment is a bitch. We get a lot of that these days. Mostly we do it to ourselves which is my point ... pros and cons to be sure. : )
All good.
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Peers ... can't live with em, can't live with em out em.