Searching for anything good...(sigh)

[JustaGal]

I know and understand your suffering. I struggle daily with anxiety. I think the worst part of it are the self destructive stories that I tell myself. I recently got into a new relationship and I live in constant fear that I am going to be "lied to, cheated on, have one pulled over on me, etc.". I've broken up with this guy four times in the past month and he hangs in, realizing that it isn't really me talking when that happens. Its just so unfair to him and to us and I feel like its such a set back each and every time it happens. I don't know what creates this. Is the fear a reaction to a gut instinct or is it just an action that he does that triggers something in me? I started a regimine of natural supplements (B-Complex, fish oil, gava, lavella, and a mood enhancing supplement in the hooes that it will reduce some of the anxiousness. Has anyone had a similar experience in a new relationship and what has helped you?

Get to the root of why you have fears in the relationship...that will be healing. : )

[struggling1234]

hang in there my friend!!

[struggling1234]

keep going mate!

[struggling1234]

theres always light at the end of the tunnel!

[awalker]

Hey E-Man,
That is quite a list. But you've inspired me to write out my own list and get it off my chest:
1. Anxiety Disorder - GAD with panic attacks. Currently on Cymbalta 60 mg and Wellbutrin 300 mg. Doing much better but all day long have the apprehensive feeling that I could lose it and have 24-7 panic again like I did back in March.
2. Weight problems. Anxiety makes me lose my appetite..lost 20 pounds in 2 weeks...no exaggerating. And I was in the low BMI bracket to begin with. My doctor said she was going to hospitalize me to make sure I ate unless a relative would come and stay until I gained some weight back. I have at least stopped descending but still drinking Ensure like an old person frequently. (Im 31).
3. Marriage problems. can't go into detail but we are getting counseling. I notice my anxiety goes way up when I'm' around my husband.
4. Secondary Infertility. Had a baby....then husband had hernia surgery and damaged one of his tubes that delivers the sperm down. No more babies for us. Hard because people aren't very sympathetic since I already have one. I grieve every time I'm around a pregnant woman or anytime someone announces they are pregnant with their fourth or fifth or sixth child.
5. History of sexual harrassment from my older brother.
6. Because of #5, have self-esteem, body image issues as well as trust issues.
7. Miscarriage before my first child leading to my anxiety disorder.

Well, I know it's nothing compared to your list but I think I will try to do a positive list now.
1. I have a son who is healthy and generally quite happy.
2. I have a husband who I know loves me.
3. Besides starving to death, I have no life threatening illness.
4. I have lived to make it to 31 (some people don't).
5. I have a german shepherd puppy that I love so much.
6. I have food to eat and a bed to sleep in and live in a country where I am not worried about war or poverty.

These are huge things.....I need to do this every day!
7.

[jessed03]

Nice post, awalker.

Starting the countdown to Eman's return

[Dahila]

Good luck, people with countdown to Eman's return) I miss him too

[needtogetwell]

I miss him three!!! Lol

[jessed03]

He told Nixon he's coming back today.

Continuing the countdown to Eman's return...

[Im-Suffering]

Ive always described this man as beautiful (spirit guides description from a soul perspective). Maybe this hiatus and some peace has finally allowed him to accept this about self. That has always been the goal.

Because when that is accepted and believed the magic starts and the crap lifts that was once blocking the view.