This analogy exhibits many cognitive thinking errors.
You're signifying your struggle with a horrid image inking it as an idea that is out of your control. As if your mother being beaten against your will, the anxiety has the same out of control association and thus holds on to you as such. But you see, there is no outside force beating on your mother. In this case the outside force is yourself, and your mother represents you.
You keep bringing back the punishment and letting it inflict itself upon your mind. You're out with friends and dwell on worries and ideas leading to a loss of reality and joy. The one giving the beating is you, and only you.
Let go, move past your issues and seek ideas that carry your life forward. Appreciate the present and live in the present. It's all you have. The past and future doesn't exist. Thinking about that savage beating in the past isn't an idea that's behind you or in the future. You're making it your current reality.
I hope you allow others ideas to help you. You have talent with how you associate thoughts. Do it more proactively and you'll get somewhere
![Wink](images/smilies/wink.png)