I feel like giving up.....

[Brans0605]

I know that I shouldn't and I haven't this far but everything I try to tame this anxiety, seems to only work once. My medication has room for improvement but I can only see my pdoc every three months. I'm waking up in the morning with horrible anxiety, crying and scaring the living day out of my girlfriend. I can't seem to hold on to reality when I want it so bad. I want to worry about the "normal" things again. I can't even concentrate on paying my bills because I'm fearful of something that doesn't exist. I hate feeling like I'm sleep walking or day dreaming my life away.
Friends, I need some advice from those who have suffered or know someone who suffers. I have only been dealing with anxiety since October of last year (2013) and have been on the "right" meds since January. I just need to know someone understands.

[Brans0605]

Just a short word for you since I happened to drop in.

What you have asked for in the quote is misguided, and would only keep you suffering. Thinking clearly now, when not in the throws of fear, sit back and decide what you really want, and what would be beneficial for you.

"I need some advice from those who have suffered but now suffer no more, who can show me hope, faith in healing because they themselves have healed, someone who now believes in health, vitality, and new beginnings, someone to inspire me to create a life free from this because they have done it"

Do you see the difference, one destructive, the other inspiring and constructive. After you are finished corroborating how you feel, and your symptoms, and if you wish allow some time to pass so you can learn to feel what anxiety feels like and validate it, search out someone who resembles what I have described, and do it earnestly, and persistently.

I'm seeking advice to know that this is something that can happen at my stage of anxiety. Is it normal to feel this way? Although I have anxiety and continue to suffer from it, I would be willing to give advice to someone who may be experiencing something that I had gone through in the early onset of my anxiety. I asked friends to give me advice about what is currently going on, because I don't count out anyone who may offer any type of advice. My quote being, I need advice from those who have suffered (meaning who do not anymore, as you suggested) and those who may still be suffering but have gone through this part of the anxiety. I think advice from anyone, continuing to deal with anxiety or not, is good advice.

Thank you for your words.

[shakyshawn]

Hey, brother. Listen, I’m not going to pretend I know how you feel because we all get this affliction differently. However, you described some of the same things I have suffered. I too would wake up a crying, crazy mess. I couldn’t focus on my bills or my job…I even lost friends.
I’m afraid I have no magic answer. But I will tell you this, there are little things you can do that, in the end, will add up and strengthen you. See, that’s the thing; there IS NO one thing that will help right away. No pill, no therapy, no special exercise or meditation. I know because I learned that through trial and error. The effect has to accumulate over time. I’m sure you know this already.
You mentioned your girlfriend. One thing that helps me is, I try my best to save all of my worried and scary concerns for one time and I talk to my lady friend before bed. This may not work for you, but it’s worth a try if you can pull it off. If your girlfriend is supportive and is willing to listen to you, I find that it helps me to fall asleep more peacefully. There is something therapeutic about talking it out, and doing it before bed really helps. Plus, if I don’t talk about it all day, and save it for a certain time, it keeps me from dwelling on it AND it keeps my loved ones from getting tired of hearing about it (big concern for me).
Also, writing my worries and fears and pains down…wow! What a help that is. Sometimes just getting it on paper makes a huge difference for me. When I write it down, I can see it and it gets it out of my head. Then I can write questions like, “The reason this scares me is…”, “I feel this way about this because…”
Sorry I don’t have better answers for you. I wish you happiness and peace.
Just don’t give up.

[Brans0605]

ShakyShawn -- Thanks for your post. Although, I am a female ;-) lol. Never the less, I really appreciate you reaching out. I feel like I put way too much on people when I'm talking to them about my problems. I hate doing that. I'll try writing them down and go from there, as you said it helped you. And your answers were great!! :-) Thanks again!

[shakyshawn]

Doh! Sorry about that! *facepalm* Well, I'm gald it helped you a little. I really wish you the best!

[Brans0605]

Hey, no worries! Thanks ShakyShawn. I wish you the best as well.

[Vanessa45631]

Hey Brans0605,

Just keep swimming.

My mom always says that you eat an elephant one bite at a time. Anxiety is like that elephant you have to eat. You're never gonna swallow it whole, but you will make progress. Keep moving forward.


Here's something that helps me during a panic attack:
Out loud, say the first five colors you see.
Say the first five things you can hear.
Say the first five things you can feel with your body.

This is a grounding exercise that can help you feel more in touch with reality.


Good luck, friend.

[Brans0605]

Thank you Vanessa!! I will definitely try that

"Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming!" lol!!

[Steven Miller]

I feel like I put way too much on people when I'm talking to them about my problems.

You don't put too much on me. And if I felt you were, I would tell you or stop reading.

That is life. Anxiety people hate being out of control. They hate not knowing what will happen to them ahead of time. Let go. Other people can take care of themselves. Give yourself a break. Do what you want to do, say what you want to say. Be yourself. Be who you really are. Take risks. Give people the freedom to say "You are telling me too much about your problems, I don't want to hear about them". Give them that freedom, and give them the freedom to say, "Thank you for talking about your problems, I am so glad I could help". Be curious how people will react, and don't put your expectations on them.

As for me, thank you for sharing your story. It was helpful because I see parts of myself in all the posts on this forum. So I am always learning more about me, and trying to help others to learn more about themselves. Nothing in life makes me happier than to work towards a common goal with another person or people. In this case that goal is to collectively move past anxiety, step by step.