About month ago I wrote a thread regarding my fear of dying young.
It's gotten worse. I went to my therapist since I started having derealization attacks and panic attacks, shes says I might be suffering from depression.
I cry everyday, I am a total bitch to my mom and sister and all I do is worry about my future and cry cry and cry.
I guess I just don't understand why some people have to die young. I just don't grasp the fact why people have to leave so soon when they could have had a bright future. I guess Im just sensitive but it just really makes me sad. I want to do so much in my life and be someone and travel and just live the life i have always dreamed of, im just scared it will be cut short and it really scares me. I know I just have to live now in the moment but its easier said then done. I haven't had any loses in my life either. Besides my 2 grandpas but it really didnt affect me. I did stop having contact with my dad and he doesn't really care about me and my sis so I guess that really did affect because I really loved my dad he really was the best dad anyone could have. My mom is starting to worry about me, she really thinks something is wrong with me since i am 16 and this isnt normal for 16 year olds to think about. I live in Sweden and to be honest its pretty good here. I havent seen any accidents and everyone drives good and stuff, its not like america (america is kinda crazy no offence) but I still can't grasp the fact about death. Im not scared of dying at an old age I find it peaceful, but when you have to leave at such a young age it just makes me depressed and down. I love my life so much and I dont want it to be cut short I worry every single day and I just cant take it anymore I want my old life back. I can't picture my future anymore either. I used to able to see myself and be like wow I cant wait to do this and that, Its just dark and I'm so scared. Please can someone talk to me (nothing religious dont follow any religion) so I can be happy again.

(I've lost touch with most of my friends, I cant concentrate in school, I always think something bad is goiing to happen)