Hi guys,

Long story short:

I was a heavy pot smoker up until 8 years ago when I had my first panic attack. I was convinced I was having a heart attack, next three weeks were hell and I slowly but surely recovered. I quit all drugs and have been drug free since.

Now, since October / November 2011, I could feel my anxiety coming back gradually, especially with the build up to Christmas. I was having what I think are intrusive negative thoughts about loved ones etc

About 4 weeks ago, I was out for the weekend and I drank way too much. Went into work the next day and felt fine but I had a freak out at around 8pm that night.

Next day I went to the doctor and explained the situation, doctor said I mild General Anxiety. Gave me some betablockers but I never took them.

Next few days were tough but I got through them - went to the cinema, can control my breathing etc and have started going jogging every night ( WHICH REALLY HELPS )

Fast forward 3 weeks after the panic attack and now my mind is playing games with me.

I keep asking myself "how do I know" questions which is really pissing me off - for example:

How do I know what I do is right?
Why are we here?
How do I know my partner / kid loves me?
How do I know who my parents really are?
Am I in the truman show?
Is this the matrix?
If I go to the doctor, how do I know their real?
Is this laptop real? How was it made? How do I know? How can I prove it?

As you can imagine, this stuff is doing my head in - feel like I'm loosing it.

It's like I'm questioning absolutely everything that I'm doing.

I've never been on any medication for anything AND I DO NOT WANT TO either. I was thinking about goin back to the doctor and asking about CBT but I'm not sure.

My life is stressful, self employed with staff, girl friend and child but I love them all

Any thoughts / suggestions welcome.