Very strange/scary thoughts before and during naps/sleep.

[Im-Suffering]

I would love to hear every response to this thread. Sleep is my mortal enemy.

I have never liked sleeping, now that I wear out so easily I can no longer spend 3 days awake at a time. My circadian rhythm is riddled with odd occurences.

I can only manage to sleep comfortably if I am either not alone or between the hours of 6 am to 10:30 AM. That part at least is like clockwork. About every three weeks or so I will shut down and sleep for a good 14 hrs or so.
If I sleep I will dream vividly every time. When I dream I run the risk of running into those stupid dream memories, re living things I have effectively forgotten in my waking state. In my sleep I talk, cry,scream, and punch, so much so my kid now sleeps at the opposite end of the house with headphones on.

I want rest so badly these days it almost makes me cry (if I were the crying type).

If I need more than 4.5 hours of sleep I go to bed with a trazadone/diphenhydramine cocktail. It works except it makes me feel like total butt in the morning and there is no getting up to an alarm or waking me.


If I am not alone then I seem to sleep okay. I still mumble and cry a bit I am told but it doesn't wake me fully. Unfortunately right now it isn't financially or emotionally responsible for us to live together yet.

So I guess I don't have any useful advice on this one, but I can relate to it very well.

Here is your useful advice:

There is no such thing as 'extremely abnormal thoughts' so don't go with the sheep on this one.

What keeps you awake is your inner self FINALLY grabbing your attention to get rid of all of those false ideas you hold about yourself, those mental problems that remain unresolved and those conflicting beliefs that played havoc with your life since childhood.

In the terms of the OP in this old thread "stray, abnormal thoughts' - and I do not even like those words because they are FALSE IDEAS, but using them in this context, they are therapeutic. In that they lead you to a resolution, and healing.

Should any of you continue to ignore your inner 'calling' then the vice grip of pain and fear will grow ever tighter, until you are ultimately forced to look at self when every other distraction has failed.

I have written a textbook on this topic throughout my posts, you can go back and read them, any of you.