Good Afternoon Everyone! I'm extremely happy (and calm) that I've found this forum to express my random craziness in dealing with Anxiety.

I'm 31, employed, educated, married (with no children), an only child to a Schizophrenic mother (of which I believe has been misdiagnosed) and the eldest child of a funcitonal crack-cocaine user. Spicy huh?! LOL. I enjoy my life and everything in it - it's just that sometimes, my anxiety gets the best of me. I've become overly obsessed with my health. A little over two years ago, I've developed Costochrondritis - as a result of my anxiety issues (and I'm not on any medication - never have been). My therapist stated it was mild and didn't pose an urgent need for it. Instead, she suggested exercising, writing and meditation - and all of this helps. I no longer experience panic-attacks, nightmares, wild/obscene thoughts but sometimes, I'll become overwhelmed with fear.

Fear that my chest pain is linked to heart disease (eventhough I've been cleared by a cardiologist and rhematologist that everything is fine) or that I'll experience a psychotic episode like my mom one day, or that I may lose my mind suddenly or that if I have children, I'll be a bad mother or that I may spend my time going back and forth in this vicious cycle of worrying and I'll miss out on all the beauty life has to offer.

I'm constantly looking for reassurance that I'm okay and that I'm loved. It hasn't all been bad but I'm out here trying to live my best life by taking it one day at a time. The good part about it all is that I NEVER feel suicidal, hopeless or desperate (and I'm so grateful for this). However, I'm a Pisces and from what I've read - everything I've explained is normal.

Is there anyone else that can relate to this?