Hey there, this is my second post, im really finding this website helpful, anyways im just wondering if any of you lot experience this sort of panic:

I used to worry alot about myself (health anxiety) but not so much as my anxiety is thriving in different areas and testing my ability! Anyways, whenever my partner goes out/leaves the house and is out for ages I start to panic a little and eventually get to the state where im utterly in fear for the worse, I cry, pace floors, sometimes feel im actually about to throw up. Now, he is 23, sensible, he doesnt drink and he is careful. Tonight he was out with his friend who needed abit of guidance prior to a break up so it was best I didnt go as a couple comforting wouldnt be helpful, anyways I knew he was sat on a field within a minute walk, I knew he and his friend would be putting the world to right and wernt in any danger but still I worried 'what if anything bads happened' but I resisted texting him as I wanted to proove myself wrong, which I did

Friday was a bad day, he went out to meet our friend and after a few hours I started to worry, so I rang my friend and asked if he was with my partner, he wasnt anymore he had left ages ago, so my friend rang him..no answer which is unusual as he always has his phone, I then text him several times..no reply (he generally knows to text me absolutely anything, even a blank text so I know hes ok and he usually does. So anyways I started panic terribly my heart was thumping out my chest, I was nearly sick I didnt manage to eat my tea, I was crying, overthinking possibilitys that could have happened (i have extreme real life images and almost flash back like images) pacing the room and praying to hear the door, eventually through my torment the door went. I instantly went in a mood with him which ruined his night and he was gutted. Turns out he missed the bus home and decided to meet his friend for an hour until the next bus, his phone had also died.

I was so disappointed in myself, he doesnt go out much but when he does I go and so stupid shit like that, I trust him 100% so theres absolutely no worry about who hes with at all, I want him to enjoy himself and socialize, he deals with my burden real well he understands all my anxiety issues and never judges me hes even changed his ways in thinking and is always happy and positive which helps me massively but he needs a break and a social life who doesnt! I need a break from myself, Christ, anyways.

Its unnormal and even I know its unreasonable and over the top, he doesnt even go out often and the times I dont go with him is because I either dont feel like it, know il get cold sitting outside and also because I want him to have a break from me.

Now here is the next bit, hes going to a concert on Friday with his friend, its going to be really far away, his friends driving, as I say there sensible enough to afterwards find somewhere were they can sleep in the car for the night so they dont drive back the same night after driving there and it would be silly driving back late at night/early hours after a long day, my partner is going to keep me updated every hour just sending a short text so it gives me piece of mind but still im probably not going to sleep, im going to be a absolutes wreck!