You have the most important part fo all this, and that is the will to get better, so you eventually will be!

You are most likely addicted to Benzos which can cause anxiety in themselves for the amount you've been n them, especially in between doses. When I was getting off Klonopins I used http://www.benzobuddies.org/ to help me. When the time is right, post your story on that site and have them help you.

You may have a thyroid issue, which is the lump in your neck. If so, it's easily treatable. Go get everything checked out.

When you go out with your dad, just know, what's the worst that can happen? You have a panic attack. I had them in public a few times and here I am. A panic attack is just a fight or flight response inherently built into your biology as a survival mechanism.