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Thread: Dave's Dairy

  1. #261
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    Just watched day 28

    I'm glad I'm nuts.

    Yeah, hard to find a good doctor nowadays that won't over medicate and I like APRN or DO over an MD.

    I Should be here, but if not, hope everyone is well with you and yours. No plans here, just hope its quiet. Haven't had ham in so long, but be salty.
    Last edited by salvator here; 12-23-2021 at 10:39 AM.

  2. #262
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    They are just so damn quick to dismiss always finding it hard to acknowledge that anyone else might be onto something re their own health. True that re the over medicating. You should of seen the look on one doctor's face when I told him I was quitting the anti psychotics. Like a prison warden watching someone escape. Absolutely zero encouragement but lots of demeaning and telling me I would fail. I don't like the word hate, but I have to admit it surfaces quickly when I think if doctors. They are the most indoctrinated people on the planet and used as high ranking pawns to keep people sick. I have to be in a real bad way to contemplate seeing one and near death to enter a hospital. Of course I am embellishing, however the feeling is very much like that. I detest society's medical system. The so called advances are simply not worth it. We are taught to fear death and in that space we live in fear from day to day.

    Better to learn what we can for ourselves and use them as no more than dispensers being very careful when it comes to their advice. Of course most puppets of today worship them with drones in forums like these praising and worshiping them. hahahaha Talk about how much more one could not fit. "Must go see a doctor!" Heads Up - "Must go fuck yourself!" How you like the sound of them apples? hehe

    Arrrr fuck it ... all is good. My daughter just got back from seeing a shrink in one of the neighboring towns about an hour + away. She has a cocktail of meds. I and her mum have 'suggested' that she simply play along regarding the meds. Given them the usual time to destroy the bodies defenses (as is exactly what takes place) during the atypical 6 weeks. Went of to educate for lack of a gentler word about the importance of only then reporting by way of phone the impact the medication is actually having in terms of Helpful, no change, and unhelpful symptoms and so on. Like me she has pretty all the rations of side-affects listed in the fine text not often found on the bottle or told by these over-educated so called professionals. Finished off by saying a little persistence with our ingrain dislike for these doctors can at times pay off with regards to societies labeling system that for rejects likes us it is best to have some form of certification otherwise live a life of eternal justifications, warranting and evidence searching. "You can always come off and go back on the meds as your experience builds ..."

    God forbid they label a person without defining the condition without using meds. That's how fucking brainwashed and marketed doctors have become. It comes as no surprise that a shrink is now the first and foremost go-to regarding welfare insurance agency claims - that is to say your run of the mill westernized mental health claims. They emphasis is on such is to cut back to wave of instability created in the systems own wake whilst at the same time chemical controlling those who are warranted with any like condition. That's that fucking game!

    At any rate - that shrink welcomes her case as the family makes a classical one when it comes to so called dysfunction. But oh how so little they know. Not to depute the instability. Fucking Oath ... was are classic cases of 'unable' in this fucked up world that they seem to think is advanced and evolutionary moving forward. What a small and narrow minded view they really have.

    FACT - or at least my as I am best reading it more and more - Most humans of today on this fucked up de-evolving world have some form of mental illness that is more plagued than any demoralizing time in our brainwashed history as deceptively written.
    __________________________________________________ ______________________________________

    GOOD MORNING ALL.

    Oh fuck ... did you say salt!

    God Fucking Damn it! ... I completely forgot about that.

    That would truly something if I could not eat one slither of ham whilst it is sitting there in the fridge beckoning me.

    RIGHTO - it's a done deal ... FUCK THE HAM TOO! FUCK this Xmas bullshit for now. I really need to prove I can do this. I've said no to so many things I am not going to fuck up now.

    I'm worried about the impact of this so called vaccine on my health reclamation plans this time around. I think it may or may not be impacting on my metabolic process and thus it just another chemical constraint holding me back. This is a hard call because this is also the first time I am taking control of my health whilst being so fat and doing so with way WAY less exercise than I typically do. I am just going to have to ex\exercise patience instead.

    Of course I will continue to take the jab. I do hope the my missing the second Jab due to being sick will be OK if I have it like a month later? I ponder to think if I have fucked up because of the timing involved. WTFE ... The amount of places we can no longer go is increasing every month with more and more sheep starting to write negative things about those that call the 'un-vaccinated' Us and Them rings loud on social media and out on the streets. I take it 100% under duress but then do my best to forget about it and remind myself of how many other things are toxic in this world.

    Yet it does me little good when I think about the effort I know make to reclaim my health. In fact thinking about the vaccine and all the deception whilst doing so is not good for me at all.

    Anyways ... that's all the dislike expelled.

    I've been making small gains out on my walks by walking a little taller and angling my head more confidently whilst listening to topics and tunes that help with such. I've even received a few nods from others struggling themselves. Not talking about smiles from well to doos ... I avoid what I call wellbeing snobs. I'm careful not to let my head raise to high lest my nose be the first thing that comes tumbling down. lol That said I do feel we need to be accepting of all. I understand the sense in how it has to be in order for us all to connect on a level that is beneficial for all.

    All this expelling is not to be taken literal as I even know I really don't know. It's just a view that changes from time to time depending on many dynamics of this world and that which I allow to take place in mine. To play the game rather than be played and thus view it as something else when the time comes.

    OK - enough blubbering for now.

    On with my day.

    Take care ...

    OH - Sal --- how did your session go with the therapist? Was it a decent connection for the both of you?

  3. #263
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    You can defiantly do. I'll try to find some good pics and make the ham sound a gross and nasty as possible to help you. Instead of salt, sodium latent pig ... oink oink


    ....................

    God, isn't this awful when we have our triggers. When I watched your vid, there was that part of me when you mentioned the bottle of champagne, I was like ... I'll fly over there tonight and be happy to take it. Ugh, hate to say this, I used to be the first person to open up liqueur store along with a few local lushes. I can say, there is ZERO chance that would happen now, sometimes it crossed my mind because the mind never forgets; 2 more hours until it closes, 1 more hour, 15 minutes to catch a bus.

    Was ok, I guess, we just chatted actually and he allow me to just vent now and that seams to help. Luckily we're on the same page with 90% just by chance. Most doctor and therapist are like you say, like a God like here. Hard to even switch and once shit gets into the records (have this problem) that haunts me. Hard to explain but I think you do get it.

    Yeah, all kidding aside, we just have to get to next year as nothing is going to happen this year with the case, so just need to enjoy and "be" or whatever.

    Middle of Jan or Feb and we'll start the process again, but, I did all I could this year to remain out of the hospital. Came very very close, but avoided it.

    I like my therapist and she said she does like me to so that is good and she never judges and when I do off and get lost, she brings me back.

    PS: so you didn't go with Cinnamon, I tried to Cinnamon distros (one today, actually) and its no good at all with this old clunker. Some ugly builds out there but I'm in no rush and will likely just go live dvd until I make up my mind.

  4. #264
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    Had to put my response in the video. ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Time of year is wearing me down with all the preparations going on around me and very hard to eat clean whilst living with others eating junk. The smells when cooking as well can be quite triggering ...

    zzzzz

    https://youtu.be/8i4snVZifC4
    Last edited by Ponder; 12-24-2021 at 05:09 AM.

  5. #265
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    Thinking of you; we'll get through this.

  6. #266
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    Day 30 - I got through it rather well all things considered. Having done so I feel there is not much that can temp me throughout the whole year.

  7. #267
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    Computer Water Cooling Project pretty much complete and despite my fears I can say has been worth it in the end. My graphics card GPU is indeed running cooler as to the VRam which I thought would not given the shoddy backplate. I may still upgrade to a better GPU water block but not so fussed about it right now. This project was in the end a win all round. Now I can turn my hyper focus onto my weight loss goals and new healthy regime.


  8. #268
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    A New Focus for the New Year:


  9. #269
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    So glad you had a nice celebration with family, sounds like it was great. We made it though it.

    Yeah, new focus sounds better than new start. I need to start walking again, in the house too much and getting weak. We can't change the world or other people, I guess, only our focus. I need to shift the focus on what is right and try to let go of what isn't so it won't drag me down. Will be start over with case again perhaps mid January. Sort of been hovering and avoiding because I was simply in no shape.

    Same, new years isn't important and I don't "celebrate" those days are over now. I can watch the ball drop on youtube. Or, maybe, I'll watch my own balls drop ... hahah ... dropped a long time ago.

    Please do keep me in mind for the new forum when you think the time is right.

    Are you sure that monster computer won't become "self aware" and take over when your sleeping I swear my computers are aware. Sometimes if I do something wrong, it will send a shock through they keyboard to let me know its not happy.

    ...

    EDIT: To tell you the truth, that time to leave this joint and put it behind us might come sooner rather than later. This place is now Romper Room unchained nonsense. Please keep in touch and take care
    Last edited by salvator here; 12-28-2021 at 09:08 AM.

  10. #270
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    I'm so glad we are friends Sal. You often put a smile on my face.

    I think I will send you a link in about 24 hours from now. It may not be finished and look pretty rough but is better than sticking around here given the present state and how it's been for some time now.

    I've been consumed with other things but today I will make it a priority to at least have another space that ticks all the boxes similar to here.

    I best get my mind onto that now.

    hehe ... You last post made me smile a dozen times. I really needed that. Thanks.

 

 

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