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  1. #121
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    So hard to find any balance or equilibrium in this madness out there.

    Sorry everyone

  2. #122
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    Please know that I am here and that as you know my own struggles with addiction that I am in fact reading. Yet I understand the disclaimer. I've touched base in a few other threads and left some encouragement that might help with lifting up ... but for now man, I think this is excellent stuff and don't want muddy the waters as what your doing right now in here is something I feel more of us would benefit in doing. Way better out than in Sal. I have to continue working on something else and will come back here later to pay even more respect which we all deserves. I think the struggle in many other forums Sal is the lack or respect. I am totally 100% right by your side with all you said and you just said it so well.

    I'm glad it has lifted a weight Sal. That is why we need the space that this particular forum offers.

    I started making small steps before making the final decision. I found that in fact help me make the final decision which eventually cut it all out. I think your onto something with that. Do it all in your own time. As long as you feel you are moving forward that is all that matters. Your attitude to food has actually helped me from many posts ago.

    Take care Sal ... I have been thinking about your situation and I say again you are never heavy. I wish more would join us in these dairy type threads and just say it like it is or how it is for them. This truly is the forum for doing jus that.

    I really needed to hear someone else say it the way you did. YOU ROCK SAL!
    Last edited by Ponder; 12-15-2021 at 07:56 PM.

  3. #123
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    Wow .. feeling this right now. Even just through the HP Speakers this is pretty good overall.

  4. #124
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    Awesome Sal - Just used it whilst writing out my wall of text. I do hope that your are resting well as I begin my day and accept whatever comes. Perhaps then I can actually do the things I love. Thinking of you. I go have a small cup and sip some green tea. Thanks to you.

  5. #125
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    Glad it helped, sometimes those Chakra videos help, sometimes, I'm too absorbed and numb to feel which is worse sometimes, but I'm working on this because when those of us that feel energy, we have to somehow filter with firewall or something.

    https://www.healthline.com/health/fi...cise/7-chakras

    Thank you for caring, will try to remember to appreciate the the things I love about being alive. Sometimes, very worth the pan, sometimes, I don't know. I don't know.

    Waiting to talk to her today and we'll see. Likely will not change meds again and see, its not the meds, its me.

    I'm drinking mint tea with splenda (bad sal) and will try to just accept what comes and just "be". Hmmm ... just be, if people weren't involved, I could just be and not worry. Actually, there is something to talk to her about today. I'm just me and I don't pretend to be anything other. Wouldn't want to be "normal".

    Will report back after and hopefully get outside, if you only knew how long I've been inside. Ugh ...

    Ok, I feel (cautiously and suspiciously) stable atm
    Last edited by salvator here; 12-22-2021 at 11:38 AM.

  6. #126
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    I hope both the tea and the session goes well. It's always nice to actually have something to talk about. My sessions next year will be further apart so I think that will help re finding helpful topics to bring up. I'm glad you mentioned about having a topic on mind as that can really help. Even in day to day stuff.

    Look forward to hearing about whatever your able to share when you get back.

    All the best Sal.

  7. #127
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    Numb like a zombie cadaver. Fucking horrible today, everything is madness out there. Couldn't go out just messed around with the computers all day long. Had to just watch dvds today ... TV is cult. Dinner tomorrow is actually rice and beans that the old couple make for me.

    For those looking for a laugh, this Linux cinnamon distro was so much fun today, but I just can't take it seriously. Cute though!

    I would suggest just a live dvd session to try it out for fun only enjoyment. Still looking for something descent that won't make me vomit like some I've tried. Debian seems enjoyable and I'm (somewhat) familiar. Linux dot org forums is too toxic for my liking. Like funny with Serpent and 360 Chrome (browsers) I'll hopefully get a few more years out of this junk and WIN 5.1 ... who knows ... things change every week. Shake my head when I crank it up each day. I think I won't let it run towards the light and go to Dell heaven. Ha!

    https://sourceforge.net/projects/fep...5.iso/download

    Neat idea and it does work as expected; nonetheless.
    Last edited by salvator here; 12-24-2021 at 06:17 PM.

  8. #128
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    Getting ready to watch sometimes ... will report back when I can come up with something.

  9. #129
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    Srry Sal _ had to ditch that link as it started downloading without giving me a choice.

    I'm sure you will work it out with the computer. I finally got my water cooled PC on the table and setup. Just need to get the lighting working but happy to report my fears are not as I thought things to be. Is now running cooler on all counts.

    Yea - things are mad here but settled on today as actaully the day everyone was waiting for. Now we have the Boxing day madness to come.

    Thinking of you ... be well as can be.

  10. #130
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    Yeah..

    I had to press F1 for help and a huge box popped up, reading:

    "Dude ... you are WAY beyond help. Please put on your seat belt and push yourself away from your decides. You have been warned to no operate heavy machinery. Please pres F13 on your keyboard and this will self destruct your computer and you'll no longer able to harm electronics again."

    ........=P

 

 

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