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Thread: Ponder

  1. #41
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    Neck pain gone, glasses found, all is good. Little one started school today and making progress in other areas. Computer Charity also running just fine with more donations coming in and another computer going out. We (My wife and I) just opened a new Origin Gaming account that we can share without risk of being hacked. That's going to be an interesting perk for our recipients to log on one at a time to try out different games. I have a laptop to setup later this evening actually with a couple more ready for the refurbishing bench.

    Food wise I am going very VERY good. I can feel the excess fat feeding my body as I rely on not much more than veggies Juice, raw salads and steam vegetables with a few whole fruits. Lots of water in between with the odd herbal tea ... speaking of which ...

  2. #42
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    1st APPOINTMENT WITH NEW THERAPIST:

    Good Morning

    DETOX - TIME TO BACK OFF A LITTLE:
    I woke up just after 4am somewhat tired but felt much better after I got up. Due to my eczema issue and despite losing another 2kg over the last couple of days, I am going to back off the juicing for now. My broken anatomy is taking too much of a hit. The whole missing gallbladder thing and resultant taxed liver, generally complicate my detox phases compared to that of younger and less affected individuals. I also don't have the best kidneys. Additionally the stress that my journey presents combined with whatever labels (I care less to identify with) also see me with digestion issues. It's time for me to easy up a little on the amount of detoxing pressure I put on my system. I am sure the eczema for whatever trigger is a sign for me to listen. The eczema itself in on my face and quite uncomfortable. Today I will resume eating some oats and include some more healthy fats throughout the day but still keep an eye on portion control as well as timings. I don't feel the hungry but somewhat in a little discomfort and sweaty. I just need to reduce the intensity of my health reclamation. Might go put those steal cut oats on now and throw in some prunes while I am at it then add some banana and top of with spiraling. Yea ... that will do the trick; never fails. I think a little more on where I want the next bit of text to go.

    1st APPOINTMENT WITH NEW THERAPIST:
    I'm not sure if I am doing the right thing going back to a therapist. I've been having a break after '8 years' of regular 6 weeks visits between two previous therapists. The last therapist did not end things well - She put up boundaries. Whilst I had/have no issue with the concept of doing so, it was the way she did it and from a position that now saw us on two totally different pages. Previous to this government changes were made where the role of therapists being funded - involved a little more paper work. She no longer liked her newly defined role as it related to keeping me on as her client. It was getting in the way of our sessions and I new it. I will bring this point up today with the new proposed therapist. Transparency is a must. Regardless of faults from whoever, it was clearly time for me to move on. That said, the 4 years with her were as beneficial as the previous 4 years with another. YET - there can be one or two traps to watch out for when utilizing psychotherapy as a full time support. I'd say the 1st if pretty much the same as medication. That being - The Reliance Trap. A book to be written on that for sure. The next trap - The Identification Trap. That's it. No need to go beyond that with the traps. I think those two sum up the cons re full time psychotherapy. How do I handle those traps?

    First of all, the reason I was using psychotherapy for so long was two fold. 1st because Mood Altering Medication does not work for brain or better said ... My Being. If it did, I would of still utilized psychotherapy which brings me to my second reason of using psychotherapy for as long as I did and why I may be venturing back onto the same path. I knew/know/feel how to make it work for me. In as much as I am writing like so ... once again ... in a way that helps ground me on a level that I can understand ... my way of learning ... my way of consoling and so on ...

    So too, I utilize therapy as a means to an end. It's just another tool in which I am in control, although that term (control) as much a trap as reliance and identity. It's enough to say that I use my therapy like I do when I am in touch ... in touch within my journals. In doing do, I de-clincalise the process and do my best to keep it real/organic/grounded. I've never done well with white rooms, yet find something appealing about the nature of bright light ... yet at the same time can be easily overwhelmed with such intensity or as I feel it when in such rooms. (Now I am going on ... focus ... today I need to get the right approach ...

    My Approach ... This either makes or breaks me. I won't just take on any therapist. This point I feel many people give up on too easy. Just because the therapist I will be seeing today is a specialist in ASD and ADHD is not enough to convince me I will continue seeing her. As with any therapist I see, I have my own set of laws as much as mother nature has hers. Yet I can be my own worst enemy if I don't handle my nerves. 1st and foremost, I must remind myself it is I that chose to initiate this meeting. This element is easy to forget for those of us that do not like white walls. Our self destructive nature tends to get the best of us when trying to help ourselves. Typically during those times our nerves get the best of us. With this in mind ... I need to pave the way re my anxiety. Example:

    I am pinning a little over whether or not they will allow me to bring my scooter in as I do not like the low spec security out the front of their office combined with the fact that expense bikes and electric rides have been hot for thieves of late. Add to this that the day before I was in their office seeing my grandson's therapist. At the end of that visit, when I asked about my scooter, they could not say for sure but simply indicated that they did not think it would be a problem. The secretary and owner of building were not present. So today I am taking a risk where I may very well not take on this therapist if I am not permitted to store my ride in their building. I do have mixed feelings about that as I also want to see this person rather than base my decision on my scooter. See how the anxiety is already building up? Although my car is not available, I could walk ... yet I feel I could pull it off going with what my grandson's therapist said "...... it should be OK ...." I'll throw in one more element to add to the anxiety. Shop Talk ... seeing another therapist within the same firm that another family member also attends. Like we are not seeing the same therapist, but they do work for the same firm. I have nothing to hide ... clearly ... but I guess there is something to be said for compartmentalization. This is where the whole 'family court' issue created complexes on many levels as too pressure ... yet at the same time a good reason therapy can help. At least therapy as I understand it. To summarize here and keep on track with My Approach ... to today's 1st make or break appointment ... I have to put to rest all the above anxiety. How do I do that?

    Smiles ... long story and I have not even jumped on my scooter yet. Well ... That's it. I AM TAKING MY SCOOTER. It's my transport and that's important to me. I'll just have a good line of explanation re the low spec security. I'll bend the handle bar stem down and carry the 36kg in one hand as if it's 3 - Yea right! But yea ... I'll do that all in one movement as I make my entrance through the slide door and but the scooter up against a spot I already logged in my brain before leaving yesterday. Once they see it fits snuggle in that spot and I put down my helmet and greet them with my explanation and mention my grandson and the other lady who thought " it should be OK ..." I think I will pull it off. If not ... I'll write about that in my next post. As for the shop talk re other family members being at the same firm ... and regardless of supposed professional ethic response I know I will get ... I will simply bring it up. I wont' bring up the issue of my so call laws that I previously compared to mother natures other than say those kinds of boundaries are something best unfolded over time.

    It can take a few visits as well as a few times making new appointments with new professionals - before deciding on one I consider that really listens or really likes their job. One sad reality I find to that is how they type of funding the therapist receives often impacts how my meetings go in relation to this approach of which I speak. Later on, as I reveal this aspect of myself ... I typically see the preconditioned human side the therapist. BUT - that's OK ... we are all fallible ... imo perfection is not possible although I my ego always wants its way. More over working with the imperfections is most likely to bring positive results ... more so... that way of being ... that stability that I am seeking. ... and this my friends leads into other areas of how to make therapy work once you have nailed selecting the right therapist that gells well for you.
    _______________________________________

    Righto. It's obvious I am very nervous. I don't want to identify with my labels regardless of seeing a specialist and nor do I wish to become reliant on the all to often shallow perspective of those funding as well as my own preconditioned views. I'll deal with the scooter issue when I arrive and be upfront about all the rest doing my best to make both my approach and transition as anxiety free as can be.

    I'm off for a walk in the hope some quality UV will assist my skin ... too much makes it worse, yet a enough of it sterilizes and soothes. Such it is to walk a fine line for those infected within a toxic world.

    Here's to working on healing.
    Last edited by Ponder; 01-28-2020 at 02:54 PM.

  3. #43
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    HUG HUGE DAY - I have still been listening to this as I venture off into sleep ... very very effective for me. I find it's best if I use a speaker next to my bed.

    Goodnight:


  4. #44
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    Good Morning




    Another solid day yesterday but not so much that I was overwhelmed. My goal towards healthier choices is coming along well. I've been listening (once again via text to speech app) to a book on eating less when out on my walks. - [ Eating Less Say Goodbye to Overeating By Gillian Riley] - It's quite in depth and tackles really well the psychology on eating unlike the many other books I have read.

    You can check the book out Here - Fair warning though, any books I make available are for use with text to speech. I use this app to read the books → @Voice Aloud Reader (TTS Reader) I also use much better sounding voices that I have paid for. I recommend 'England Male Graham' ... purely subjective of course.


    Sometimes the information is not an par for me, but then at other times what I struggle with earlier then makes much more sense having listened further on. Not because of what is said, but because of how I allow myself to listen whilst relating to my own experiences. In this I do feel none of my past efforts are a waste despite the episodic nature of my being. In fact I am currently feeling quite empowered knowing I have much under my belt when it comes to the practice of building self esteem. Moreover the nature of my walk from this point is to focus on healing without the need to glorify old stories, create and get wound up in new ones. Doing so is what drags me and others down. This plays very much into why I have been cutting ties re social media as I'll touch on soon enough. Intuition on a personal level is intrinsic to my moving on. Where my intention is to again reconnect with previous long bouts of peaceful states and find lots of head space. Yet to do so in a way that is not as addictive as my preconditioning. In this I am very much working against my subconscious which is why I still struggle to this day when it comes to keeping a meditation practice. My approach to this is much the same way as it is with eating less. I am pleased to say it's evidently progressing well.

    I note I am still reactive as I'm releasing toxins in both my body and feeling states. Thankfully I finished off yesterday in a good mindset with a quiet relaxing scooter ride. I have now mastered all the different transitions speed wise which I can only hope to do for my mind.

    On that note ... is time for my morning walk. My times are not strict ... but they are thankfully in the moment and somewhat in sync.

    It's now good to know the difference between true hunger vs emotional weakness. You can't call it deprivation when you know the act of eating is more spawn from lack of control. So it is that I will give full credit to the empty feeling in my stomach instead of giving in to the self destructive whims of others who typically justify their own lack of will. A scenario often experienced at social gatherings when making healthy choices in a fast food or limited setting. 'My Inability' to deal with negative people is something that I own up to rather than blame the short comings of others. I do however acknowledge in my own way how it is that a toxic society chooses to amass in their groups using the same toxic mind sets and tools. An addiction in itself that elicits sad and bitter people great pleasure. I note to self how easily and readily that residual negativity infects and spreads. So how does one acknowledge all that and remove the resultant bad taste from such a knowing? How to remain in a state of peace sitting among all those grimaces?

    I think for me from my position, my knowing ... it is to accept that true peace is a state small in number. That my mental illness is not just about - me. I have simply woken up in a spot of awareness, that whilst surrounded by my own perceptions - I can now see how it is with so many. How it is ... that such affects me. How it is that I allow all that to affect me. Absolutely I am super sensitive, but I feel it is not healthy for me to reject the way I be ... or continue taking on the impacting tone of others which I typically take on as my own. This being the essence of that negative state that comes from ongoing commiseration. Time to break away from the atypical way of communicating in social media and likewise platforms. This one included. In this I embrace my eccentricity and ridiculed states. Smiles as I feel deeply the truth as I can only know it.
    _______________________________________

    On with 'my' day. Oh yea ... much of that in it's meaning and current state also validate my acceptance to be alone with myself. No phobia in that at all. If I can remain in such a state, I foresee that I will continue to connect with those in similar states .. but content in the knowing that number is far away and few.
    Last edited by Ponder; 01-30-2020 at 03:33 PM.

  5. #45
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    I think I did really well this week. I'll hit the scales tomorrow with positive results no doubt. That said I can handle the psychology of any negatives that comes from using scales. Feeling like I will sleep well tonight. I log in the following video as my response to all the drama others are currently wrapped up in. I had some drama the other day, but like I said - I'm done with echoing low vibes. Tomorrow morning I look forward to getting up and going for my morning walk. Nothing complex ... just a casual walk. The next week will be a big one as I'll be jumping back into the walk trot, walk trot routine doing laps at the sports oval as I have done on previous bouts. This time I have someone else to keep me company.


  6. #46
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    Smile On Track

    The change in tune seems to be working:



    Time to go play some high tech simulations that I ENJOY. Is good that I have some healthy desire running through my veins once more. Is a slow process getting back up with it being harder than the previous time. I wonder if this time round I can beat more then two years in a row after hitting my goal weight. Long term plan - I will aim for five years on the maintenance path with just over 2 years beating my record. I will allow another 6 months before hitting my target .. but at my current rate, think I'll be nearing completion in 3.

    This week ... see how I go with walk - trot - walk - trot and simple stretching. Most important is to keep up the mindset and healthy eating. For once I am glad to say I have no opinion; other than that which I seek to loose. Feeling much lighter in body, mind and spirit since attempting to do so.

  7. #47
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    Support Worker - Re My Anxiety

    5am - waiting on a guy I don't know. He is being paid to accompany me whilst I exercise. I've mention more than a few times about my varioius supports. This time I just quickly ponder on why I utilize such services? Essentially his role is based on helping me to feel comfortable whilst I am out in public. I do have outcomes I am obligated to meet, but they are not as pressured or come with as much risk if I am unable to complete; compared to when I was a mainstream job seeker welfare recipient. I'm still on welfare and my support does not come from that same service. The welfare I am on is called disability support. That one is purely money for pay for rent, food,utilities and medication. The funding for my supports comes from another agencies called National Disability Insurance Scheme - aks - NDIS. But anyways ... all that stuff is political and gets as much negative attention from social media as all the other groups. I only mention it to highlight where I fit on the anxiety scale. Why it is that I often talk about my supports.

    I've also questioned those supports over time. I've pondered if I am better with or without them. I am grateful for them. I'll say that much. I quite proactive with them as well. That I am known for. When being like so, that's when I write my journal with the intention to set goals and for the most part achieve them as well. I've become my own little expert in that arena - but the accolade means little to me. It's good to have skills - but nailing the episodic nature of instability is something else. Bit like how having knowledge is one thing but without the will to apply it and or genuine intent - it can be as much as one's undoing.

    SIGH - what's really on my mind - "is this guy going to have a uniform on?" Like I know I am a commodity and this new fella I am meeting is service provider - but anyone that knows me ... I don't like 'advertising.' I already headed off the office with an email reading this, but was the week end. I figure I will just have to explain it to the new helper. See, I have even redefined his role with me taking him from a walking billboard down to me level on some kind of degree. It's the same with those walking around with tags for all to see. I won't have it in an informal environment. Don't mind it when I am seeing doctors and have a support worker present. I think there is a place for it and then a place not to have it. This society is way too judgmental when it comes to that sort of thing.

    Smiles - because the whole support is centered around making a client feel safe, secure and less vulnerable. With my certified predisposition that warrant the support, such advertising could not be more ironic or counter intuitive. Me - I am super intuitive.

    He'll be here soon - hmmmm - I'll just give him a smile like I did then ... If I see him wearing a uniform. I was thinking of not getting in his car if it is so ... but will go ahead and just tell him if he can't come to future engagements informally to an informal settings, then I will just have to find someone else.

    Triggers ... I really should of accounted for this as its a common one with not only just me. Interesting topic though. I best get off this thing and calm down before I self sabotage.

    Sometimes I wonder if there is more pressure having this kind of support when it's done in such a manner (advertised) compared to when I am just doing my best to deal with the public on my own ... we shall see. Will report when I get back.

    1st time is always a nervous affair.

  8. #48
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    It all went well. Could not be more pleased with the outcome. Getting the above off my chest really helped. It was kind of funny, because the guy turned up late, got out of his car with a smoke and his windows all wound up. I was kind of glad because it was something I was expecting. The validation of my intuition had overridden any of the negative triggers. In that moment I was able to impart a smile liken to previously expressed one; in above post. I greeted the guy and had the conversation I needed to have with all things being upfront and transparent. I told him I like to be out the front waiting for my pickup so it helps if we are all on time. I proceeded to let him know I would compromise on the smoke if he could at least do so with his windows down prior to picking me up and thereafter refrain whilst I am in his vehicle. I moved on to disclosing that although I will often be found swearing that I do not like using such method of communicating in general. It's part of the main reason I am being supported. Chuckles to myself on that fact. Sigh ...

    The fact is, it was a good meet up and he seemed to like that fact that I was straight up. NO BS ... it's either going to work or it's not. Simple. If your interested in reading what you might consider my BS - but do so because your have nothing better else to do or find it more interesting than atypical commiseration belittling other groups ... then I will cut and paste my recent complaint that actually relates to my anxiety that was building up before this meet. It's about the way I was offended regarding a team leader who shuffles support workers around and or sets up client interactions. She spoke extremely loosely with me at first which made me question the quality of support. The mental health field has been booming over the last several years with the implementation of a number of government funded projects. That boom whilst seemingly hopeful is also rife with many cons. Almost to the point of seeing Xcons being given too much slack when it comes to taking the reigns. This being the negative side of lived experience in the 'open work place.' Please forgive me as I know that is pretty much shop talk for those employed in the community sector ... no discounting the consumer/street smart clients.

    Will have to make the read a separate one as too many characters for this one post. It takes time and effort to set one's path. Most care less to try. In my view, I think the effort really paid off.



  9. #49
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    Complaint:

    INTRO: This complaint was also logged online via [Blank] Please be aware I will be sending a copy of this complaint to my coordinator Tania ... who worked so hard in helping me get this support. Note* I had the phone call on speaker phone and Tania was present and part of the discussion. I will also send to the offending local office if I find that option.

    NOTE* I apologise that this complaint is long. I did however take the time to make it flow and be mindful in all aspects. If quality of service is something you truly aspire to, I highly recommend you read this in full. Thank You.
    _____________________________________________



    A well meaning team leader whom I only know as Jody from the [Blank] Fraser Coast [Blank] office ... deeply offended me. I am sure Jody is unaware that she has affected me like so – which I feel makes my complaint more necessary regarding the need for professionalism.


    This complaint is a perfect example of why agency based support is presenting difficulties for me and plays into another facet of the unprofessional way in which I was handled.




    OUTCOME I AM SEEKING:
    1. Do not instruct Jody to speak with me as a result of this complaint.
    2. I wish never to speak with Jody again.



    I will ask my coordinator if it's not too much work, if I can just inform her of any changes or issues I have with my support. I would ask that you consider allowing my coordinator to facilitate this preference for me; if Tania is open to that idea.


    I can only see the support going two ways. Either is works or it does not. Both my coordinator and I have worked well with things like this. I disagree and find offence in the way some agencies strongly oppose sole contractors. I will emphasise and explain this point further in the below details of the complaint.

    Out of respect for my coordinator and the support workers who are making the time for me, I will continue to give the proposed support a trial. This complaint should act as positive feedback although the content has spawned an extreme negative feeling state in me which is 100% counter intuitive to why I am seeking support. I hope someone in LPS that gets this will give it a fair hearing as well as improve ongoing services when it comes to communicating in a professional manner.
    ______________________________________



    THE COMPLAINT: [Two Parts]
    1. Negative Impact of Using derogatory language.
    2.Pushing Opinions, Not Listening and Interrupting Client.
    __________

    1. NEGATIVE IMPACT of USING DEROGATORY LANGUAGE -

    … in which the offence I took was further exacerbated when this team leader proposed a hypothetically comparing one support worker against another. As I was not recording the conversation I can only do my best to quote. You can check with my coordinator whose email I have provided and was also present … I quote “ … You never know David, he might turn out to be a fuckwit!”


    I understand that some workers feel they must adopt/reflect what they consider is the persona of a client in order to better communicate. I can see no other reason why a professionally employed staff member of a disability support service would ever resort to using such language with a client. Using this reflected/informal communication technique is not something your team leaders should be adopting when having never met or having no real understanding of a client. It's takes time to foster a respected relationship before one can warrant the use of anything other than professional terms. I have never met Jody and she does not know me. What Jody did in her position is very unprofessional and disrespects not only myself but also the other proposed support workers; including my coordinator who was present. Tania has taken the time to know and respect me. I like to think this respect is mutual despite the times I myself have offend.


    Any informal language adopted between my coordinator and I has taken time so that even when talking loosely, we still have boundaries. Jody's extremely loose approach when speaking with me, left me feeling disrespected, vulnerable, sad and later I extremely angry.

    One Key Point - I would suggest in all this regrading the Cons outweighing the Pros when it comes to the use of unprofessional communicating, is that when using swear words with many PTSD clients, is to grasp how such negative words can instantly manifest high levels of toxic feelings in which some clients work so hard to overcome. I am ashamed when I use such language because I don't like the person who I become when using such negative terms. More to the point, I try to be as compassionate as I can with some supports focused entirely on that. In this light, Jody could not of done more to offend me the way she did.




    REASON FOR SUPPORT:

    So that I feel less vulnerable, less fearful when out running around an oval early in the morning dealing with others who disrespect my space. These could be people smoking on a sports ground as I am doing laps. Others letting their dogs run off leash in an area not meant for dogs or just seemingly wishing to get in my way. I have often not responded well during such situations using the same language your team leader uses which is why when I hear such terms, I instantly feel negative states emotions. My support is all about doing what I can to overcome such ways of being. In this light, this is exactly why your staff should not assume to use such negative terms when dealing with people like me. We are not so simple. In fact many of us are regarded as complex. All the more reason for professional standards and respect. This is how I will aim to behave when in the company of any of your support workers. There are many times where I wonder who is the support person and who is the client. I mean no disrespect in sharing that. Just being honest from my perspective is all.

    _________________________


    2.Pushing Opinions, Not Listening and Interrupting Client:

    A couple of points I was trying to make that were not being heard and resulted in me being interrupted and unable to speak when I was trying to.

    Here are some of the points I was trying to make:


    1. I don't like having more than one worker.
    2. I was very anxious about having to meet two different people on two consecutive days.
    3. I don't like having workers shuffled around if one is sick.
    4. I would prefer to skip or go it alone on that day.
    5. If a match does not work out with one worker then I will decide when and if I able to try another.

    I tried to raise these points a few times myself but was interrupted by Jody where then the use of her swear words for descriptions and reasoning just make me more withdrawn. Thankfully Tania eventually included herself in the conversation to advocate for me. I need consistency. This point I believe was being misunderstood in terms of not just ensuring that support workers chosen have a better change to turn up after discussing the pros and cons re workers with young children where I have been experiencing difficulties with cleaners keep taking time off. What was happening was that Jody felt strongly about focusing the discussion on why she wished for me to have so many workers lined up and also something about me doing myself a disservice if I did not give one particular support worker a go (Names Josh) over another. This was when that statement was someone thrown in there as a comparison:


    I quote “ … You never know David, he might turn out to be a fuckwit!”

    To be honest, I felt like My so called Choice and Control was being taken away from me when spoken to on both fronts after pondering I was just told I would be doing myself a disservice if I did not try one guy over the other and then to top it off … using the phrase “.. he might turn out to be a fuckwit!”

    I wonder if anyone in IPS can sympathise but moreover be concerned about what kind of team leaders you have in place?

    I'm sorry I could not of finished this off with more hope or resolution. I feel more sorry for my coordinator and the support workers whom I have not met. This really is as disrespectful to those individuals as it is me.

    I like my support coordinator a lot and fear what she might think of me having made yet another complaint. I make these complaints so I can move on. Nothing more. I don't like the way this mental health industry has become. I do however see there is hope in various supports which is also another reason I try to give my perspective as a client more for the positive aspect of improving things. However I just feel like this complaint will be taken up as nothing but another long winded rant from an affected individual who does not know what he is talking about.

    I want things to work and I appreciate the chance to receive support so that I myself can refrain from using such language when I am out and about. I want to respect others the way I am wishing to be treated myself. Nothing more, nothing less. It's just that I am someone that needs support. Unfortunately, after speaking with your Fraser coast team leader Jody, I have to question the quality of that support. That said, I know that Jody does not represent everyone in your agency … although she does hold a position that is questionably just that.

    The irony is that the guy that comes to mow my lawn from your service is one of the most polite, tactful and friendly guys I have met.

    Kind Regards ...

  10. #50
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    You know my friend who came up and supported me earlier ... and got me into the scooter. He owns his own disability company. In fact his business was the first to receive NDIS funding in QLD. Many years ago I worked under him as a support worker. This was his response:

    I think that you have got your point across I would be very disappointed in this coordinator. I hope that they see that her language could be causing irreversible damage to the organisation. Not to mention if she is talking about staff like that does she treat them with the same distain. Because you have been on the receiving end of coordinators that talk down to their staff when working with life without barriers. Which I feel furthers the urgency for you to act on this.

    ___________________________________________

    So it is what it is ... I understand if readers here are not picking up on the context ... all good. I log it in as a win because I still ended up sticking with the plan. My Plan. That's what it all comes down to in the end. No point being a part of these programs if you can't work with them. On that note, I think I did well with the new guy all things considered. If I had not bothered taking the time to express like I did .... / as I do ... him being late on his first meet and getting out of his smoke filled car ... well, lets just say I would of taken up the team leaders mindset and started calling him a " .... fuckwit!" ... but we can't be having that.

    Instead I was in a good mind set and had the talk that needed to be. In the end we both had a good work out session. There was nothing wrong with the first cab off the rank. The team leader should not of been comparing and using the language she did. I am so glad I took back control of the situation which is on irony when you consider the latest ethical moral chant with current mental health polices being echoes is about client choice and control.

    Until next episode.
    ___________

    OH ... before I forget ... this morning photo: The Green Party! ... with a touch or red. The last thing I want to do is ... discriminate.


 

 

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