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  1. #341
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    EEEEEEEeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr When will this damn sickness end .... eeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

  2. #342
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    No, he does not call to doc, I think if it came positive we would get the phone call from doctor,
    BTW do not use honey when you have dry cough, it will irritate the vocal cords even more. Most people have no idea about it I am happy u feel better
    ''“If you cry because the sun has gone out of your life, your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars.”
    ''
    ― Rabindranath Tagore

  3. #343
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    I wish this morning I was feeling better. I was informed by the GP that a cough spawn from a viral infection can take up to 3 to 4 week to subside. It's Wednesday today. Friday will mark 2 week since I have been ill.



    I have had something similar before that was more related to some kind of mystery respiratory illness that the nurses in the end blamed on being psychosomatic. I know my sensitivities can make it worse but that's about it. What I am now going through is in either way manifested as a real experience. I will do my best to remain as positive as I can be.

    __________________________________________________ _____________________________________________

  4. #344
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    Well it's all coming to a close D. The final tally in the claims list is quite a mess to say the least. The biggest irony is how the daughter of one of the main abusers already being paid of with a house is once again double dipping and objecting to those of us happy to go equal shares when it comes to proof of debt. Like I say it's a fucking mess. In fact it would appear my brothers name is listed and that being the least amount ... BUT guess what ... He is fucking DEAD! Surely I must of read my brothers name wrong. My Sister is also confused. God love her as she insists on objecting despite the fact I have no more juice.

    The injustice of this world will never end. I have to learn to be happy with what I have, let alone whatever one gets. Remember I not long ago said I have no more fight to keep on keeping on. I think my grandson is going to be the last raging war and even in that I think it will be the war in which all that we have will eventually be spent. It's a cruel system and attachment is the biggest bitch of all. Eventually one has to given in ... in order to win. But hey ... I don't like winning or losing. Still though ... I think it's a point.
    __________________________________

    Still coughing up my guts D but maybe ... just maybe the GP is right. I am hoping so. That means that surely after this Friday I should start improving.

    I took some endome tonight to help me sleep. Is a good thing I made that box last as long as I did. I don't know D ... I really am all out of wind. I think my brother would not be surprised at the irony. Is pretty much as we both agreed during that time he foresaw he would be dead before me. Yep ... no amount of money will ever make up for that. Is very sad to see these double dippers and objectors living so selfishly. But fuck all that shit ... once that has hand has been dealt ... there is one last follow up I almost forgot about. I think Lisa will push for that Order of Australia medal to be overturned. Once the court has dealt their hand and paid off the byproduct ... I think all that irony is worth a write up in a way that gets one last bit of attention from a tone that does justice for the unjust. Something like that. Objectivity of the unintended consequence regarding the hierarchy of abuse on all sides of the fence re what really makes for true compensation contrasted with said Order of Australia re Pastor Frank Fullwood and yadda yadda ... arrrr the insanity of is all ... where does the BS end. I think I just keep talking to my imaginary friends.

    Let is go Dave ... Let it go. I just want to get well D ... I think I will settle for that. Sorry I have been down for SOOOOOO LONNNGGGGGG. Seriously before all this got out of hand I was doing well enough. I am seriously now trying to work towards getting back to my better self.
    _______________________________________

    Here is some good news D. Remember last time I got a loan I bought my Grandson a HUGE tramp. It's been great and done him really well. This time I got myself one ... but one I can use in the house. You know me. I got the best damn rebounder on the market. I spend a couple of weeks and could write a book why I went for the one I did. In fact, that's why I am not going to tell you just yet which one I got. I'll just say after doing some of my own testing on the big tramp I bought my grandson, that I am amazed at the cleansing properties you can get from various workouts that don't bust a gut. The one I bought was hard to find. There was only two left in Australia with new orders being sort from overseas.

    Anyways ... other than that ... my support worker and I went out shopping today and I added some new clothing to my wardrobe. Having him with me helped me heaps! I made sure my money was spent well and pretty much got everything I needed ... nothing wasted. I got two different sizes so I could be comfortable now with nice looking clothes as well as some nice ones to fin into as my weight is once again quickly dropping. This long summer has been my worst ever since having wavered from my optimal weight. I got to say since falling ill and am finally motivated on to stop eating myself to death. Even with so much emotional baggage still in sight I am just fucking sick of letting myself go up and down like a yo yo. My mentor is 60 and I can tell he has made up his mind not to fuck with his balance re his maintenance. He too had to work hard from his 50's onwards and spent the last 10 years being hard core stable due to an illness he has. He understand me well re the extremes and no room for vices persay. I don't know D - it might all sound like "yea yea ... sure Dave ..." but the thing regardless of whatever is to make each comeback last longer. I did almost 2 years straight and clean ... this time I will go 3 with the aim to finally just click -

    We are all going to Die ... I just want to die less painfully and the only way I know how to suffer less is to give the body less ... literally! It's not quite as simple as that but then again it is for those who know what good can come from willingly accepting pain. More meaning unless we experience said things the build up when it hits ... hits with vengeance to say the least.

    yea yea ... more bullshit Dave. WTF does any of that mean. ... all good. Here I am sprouting this garbage whilst the affect of endome take effect. lol I've got this in the bag one way of the other. I know I can do it ... I always do somehow. I know what is to come. A lot more pain coming our way D ... all of us.

    ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzz Here's to a tiny bit of healing during the night and less suffering tomorrow. Regardless of outcomes ... things are moving on and I am ok with that. I am glad this whole compensation thing will be over soon. I still have my sister and it's brought us closer ... even my mum ... regardless of all that pain I shed ... the yelling, screaming and venting. Like I always said ... the only compensation we get in the end is that which we give ourselves.

    I have even organised a mediation with the mental health facility where I used to attend ... having done all I could re my previous complaint regarding that. And yes ... the board of directors there thanked me enough that the pacification to be sort in general terms still saw some good effect on both sides of the fence ... In the end nothing is wasted if one is able to give in ... irrespective of one's own ego and all that BS ... I just want to get along ... despite no longer wishing to play the game of life.

    SIGH ... ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz The cruelty, injustice, irony and so one will always plague us to our end ... I just do my best to keep on keeping on.

    I miss you Sal ... I hope your doing alright my friend. ... I know ... is OK not to be as to not is still to be. I am still here as long as this place is still keeping on.

    ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzz

    If you keep hanging in .... I'll do the same.

    Please write when you can ... let me know what your doing to keep moving ... surely the temps across the planet are now finally moving into more temperate conditions?

    Night Night ...

  5. #345

  6. #346
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    I am here, I would love to give some advice but I have none, I am dealing with awful sadness and it seems I can not bounce back, But as always I am here D.
    ''“If you cry because the sun has gone out of your life, your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars.”
    ''
    ― Rabindranath Tagore

  7. #347
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    Sorry you are struggling also. Day 15, cough still with me, throat is now starting to swell up with nassals blocked. Double whammy. Need to start gargerling salt again. I fear the fever will return today. Is verry hard to swallow on top of all else.
    ‐---------‐--------------------

    What's going on your end D?

  8. #348
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    the results came good so I was happy for an hour, but I am sad which is not normal for me. I have that unsettling feeling, like something is going to happen, Usually I deal with it pretty easy but lately not. Could it be the stress for the last few weeks?
    My nose is also blocked and it kills me, Not only no sense of smell but constant swelling of sinuses. it ia already 9 months waiting for CT scan eh
    ''“If you cry because the sun has gone out of your life, your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars.”
    ''
    ― Rabindranath Tagore

  9. #349
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    Yes it could easily be that D. I only wish I was in a better state to console with you in a more positive light. I only just got back from the hospital. I was unable to do the waiting thing after being dismissed in the general demeanor that so often happens with the first greeting re the triage nurse. This post viral cough just seems to be getting worse. Anyways, I figure rather than stressing out any more than I was in the emergency waiting room that I would come back home and suffer some more until either a stage that I am nearly dead or I do in fact start to improve. The days whilst still tough are easier than the nights. Since I could see the sun was not far off rising, I figured I would have better relations with it, as opposed to further dismissals at the hand of interns.

    Let's hope this feeling you have also takes a brighter turn. Yes it does get harder to keep the fire smoldering as our spark fades. Best we can do as fade out as peacefully as we can. Unlike the health care system we have today, we would do well to be more compassionate towards each other. Especially during those times we are struggling like so.

    Have you made a follow up call regarding your CT scan? Given the length of time and if no followup, perhaps politely doing so might be at least help you to feel like something is being done. Smiles at the irony in that.

    If you makes you feel any better ... I too am unable to breathe through my nose whilst making this post.

    Wish me luck with lasting over the weekend - hopefully on Monday my GP can see me and if need be she can send me for a lung scan.

    Take Care D

    ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  10. #350
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    I did not go to the ER, I was instead taken by ambulance. Just got out of hospital with a real diagnoses of Pneumonia D. I think this marks 19 days of hard core suffering. Looks like I will have at least another 2 weeks ... hopefully no more than that. Is hard having to cope as it is. Lisa rang the hospital as I buckled under extreme stomach pain. I was about ready to pass out on the floor. I was running a fever of 38 with lower back pain and throbbing testicals once again. lol ... Not your average panic attack, but more the real thing. Anyways ... blood in the urine still and all that. Scans revealed no stones as was the 1st prognosis - The long standing viral cough however did reveal phenomena and the constant symptoms of that perhaps taking other areas of my body. Not sure really ... but of a mystery ... however the fucked up lungs and coughing is confirmed as pneumonia.

    Another issues that might be related is the bathroom tiles coming apart in the shower leading to wet walls and water coming through on the carpet in the hall way and lead into some of the bedrooms. The plumber who came to look agreed we could not be in the house when renovations are to be done due to the toxicity, fumes and so on that are part and parcel of the rebuild. Lisa informed the owners I just got out of hospital with phenomenon and is currently getting a diagnoses herself, thus rejecting their offer of $50 off the rent and a portable shower. LMFAO at that. If they can't put us up for the length of repairs (estimated up to two weeks) ... then we are moving house. BUT only when I have fully recovered and found a house appropriate to our needs. Their offer alone has sealed the deal for me ... alas ... my better half will seek out the end solution and I will no doubt ride with that. For now ... I hate living in this house with wet walls and floors; especially now having pneumonia. Some people should not be allowed to rent house out.

    ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

    I got this device I have to suck on to help open up my lungs to assist me in coughing up my guts. Apparently coughing is good for pneumonia ... yet ... coughing too much bloody well hurt and maybe why I got sore balls! I know it sucks living with fatigue ... I'm now certainly feeling for Lisa as I know fatigue is one of her biggest symptoms regarding MS. I sincerely hope Lisa does not have a full blown case of pneumonia ... that could be deadly with MS.

    That's the update ... Wish I had better news.

    Perhaps this was your bad feeling. hehehehee ... naaaaar ... all good. They pumped me up with fluids and IV antibiotics to give me a good start. I got more of the right meds to continue on at home. How the fuck one can heal in a hospital with all those alarms going off all the time is beyond me. I still have pain killers If I need them and like I say ... enough meds to see me though. My only issues may be just how toxic this house might be given the wet walls and floor re the fucked up bathroom tiles. Fuck this house ... I want out. I just hope I can heal in this fucked up place so I can have the strength to load up all the stuff I must. Remember I also have a house full of furniture in my shed for the charity we do ... I am going to need my strength to move both my stuff and all that.

    It will be my pleasure though. Once lands lords start to get all tophy nosed ... I'm ready to move. Moving constantly is in my blood. I also welcome the need to throw shit out. Nothing like a move to help with things like that.

    Wish me well D ... I wish you and all the others just the same.

    Adios ... until next post.

 

 

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