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  1. #161
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    Thanks D ... for sharing that. I don't like how some people tend to focus on the social phobia side of things when the solace it required. Like make out it's a negative act ... seeking out space for oneself.

    On other fronts ... things not going so well. My daughter moving in all those months ago was quite stressful for me given much of what you just said. Space. Sadly I think this latest trip and the attention it has brought her has left her somewhat more too cocky. To make things worse ... My partner has a habit of tag teaming when tensions start. That is to say, yours truly is quickly side lined with all his labels and told to deal with it. I'm still in too much pain to be putting up with all this disrespect. Woers me ... I know.

    Just not feeling well ... back in that ... Go look for your own place phase. Of course that will not do ... I already live in this house all alone despite two others living here. In fact I have been more alone since my daughter moved in. Re context above. Having official certified labels allays sees me at fault.

    What the fuck ever ... ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz I try to catch up with you in face book ... I have a quick look now. Promise not to drag you down.
    Last edited by Ponder; 01-05-2019 at 05:05 AM.
    https://www.twitch.tv/l_plate_dave

  2. #162
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    Another morning ... I try to move on. Thanks for chat D ... was good. I felt a little better after that.

    I go for a walk this morning and try to concentrate on doing what I need for me. Hopefully the others stay out of my way and stop asking me to do things. Your right ... I just want to be left alone, regardless of feeling lonely. Two different things.
    https://www.twitch.tv/l_plate_dave

  3. #163
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    P. I think it is natural to want a space even the smallest one for ourselves where we are not disturbed, I sit upstairs in computer room and close the door.
    When my hubby comes it pisses me off, When I close the door I am giving the sign that I do not want to see or talk to noone
    As long as I remember I needed some time alone, Even to read a book without distraction.
    It is about the time when people leave us to be.
    ''“If you cry because the sun has gone out of your life, your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars.”
    ''
    ― Rabindranath Tagore

  4. #164
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    Yep. How did the Markets go D? Hope all went well.

    Just a little something I found very interesting whilst out on the foot path today:


    Puts a lot of the pseudo science with regards to the labels so easily thrown about in forums like these. Words thrown around like sheep being lead of a cliff. Sad thing is most people are falling for it. Even ourselves when we need to prove our worth in order to gain that bit of help. Understanding this many of us know as we get older ... but it good to brush up with the odd podcast on the subject.

    I link one more that I thought was a little in line with this ... although might take a little more insight to understand him ... Alan Watts ... I go look for that one now.
    Last edited by Ponder; 01-06-2019 at 03:13 AM.
    https://www.twitch.tv/l_plate_dave

  5. #165
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    The previous one only several minutes ... this one I only got a half hour in before arriving home. I will listen to the rest in bed shortly.

    I love how he equates today's scientific scholars as to the favored position of high ranking church officials during the dark ages. The oppressive way in which we are all clinically controlled, is revealed both intellectually and simply through out this video. I have many labels ... but I also accept them as no more than part of a requirement in order to freely participate in an oppressive world. There is more than one way to find peace yet be written off as insane. Understanding exactly how the system controls and does what it does is the first step to keeping your head above water ... how to be sick in a world that thrives on illness, yet be well enough to find your own space.

    Something like that.

    This talk also highlights just how insightful some of us more extreme cases can be. lol ... well ... perhaps not quite like that ... but then again ... yes. Like who wants to be normal in today's normal world? *&^% that!

    https://www.twitch.tv/l_plate_dave

  6. #166
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    Slowly coming out of the very deep and very dark hole ... getting there. Visited two friends the last couple of days. It was good making the effort.
    https://www.twitch.tv/l_plate_dave

  7. #167
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    What's happening guys? My appointment re neck and shoulder was put off another week. Still waking up in discomfort yet turning up for my PT sessions. We are doing more stretching than anything else. Much needed. The turning up in the park and being out in public is enough of a stretch atm. You know how it is with that kind of thing when your not 100% ... more like 30% for me of late.

    I have two you tube videos running at the same time atm:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lHRwQ72tpbw
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8wLwxmjrZj8&t=63s

    Adjusting the volume of each just right to very good effect. Man I really needed this. Unfortunately even with my phone in desktop mode I can't run two video steams simultaneously. It really is a good effect finding a dedicated white noise video like wind, rain, trickling and then some mild ambiance to overlay with. In fact I will add some Ocean sounds:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f77SKdyn-1Y

    Yep ... just get the levels right and away ya go. Only thing is it takes practice to get just right so I don't end up with a headache or feel hung over when I take out the buds or headphone off when looking to roll over without the hassle of devices stuck in my ears or over my head. I have tried speaker to good effect to offset the cons in that, however don't like the idea of such a strong EMF so close to me bed. Kind of makes me think about the concept behind grounding sheets as too the effect of palms laying over my laptop keyboard hours all day and the electrical conduction that takes place re inhibiting the bodies nature state for healing.

    I've read some amazing claims as to that just being the tip of the iceberg when it comes to our modern day living and just how far we really our out of sync. Damned if you do and damned if you don't. I look at it more like the lessor of two evils ... just like with western medicine I guess. Right now I am unable to sleep, nor on pain medication. The effect for now at least listening to all this seems to be countering my otherwise necrotic and compulsive states.



    Now to find something that has a combination of different ambiance so I can play it on my phone. I think I will record a mix from my computer for next time. I must say I am finding this overlaying with multiple videos when done right ... very effective.



    This one is good for zoning out on the screen as a visual assisted hypnosis combine"d with sound:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oKKDfynx4ZY

    But ... now I am wasted and can sleep with no sound... ... ... ... ... ...
    https://www.twitch.tv/l_plate_dave

  8. #168
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    https://youtu.be/feRFJkFHhrU..................
    ''“If you cry because the sun has gone out of your life, your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars.”
    ''
    ― Rabindranath Tagore

  9. #169
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    ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
    https://www.twitch.tv/l_plate_dave

  10. #170
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    I feel very lazy lately...................still getting very painful back muscles spasms
    ''“If you cry because the sun has gone out of your life, your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars.”
    ''
    ― Rabindranath Tagore

 

 

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