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  1. #1
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    Why I Don't Like Being Manic

    I've been dealing with bi-polar disorder (manic depression) for many years. And I'm not the only one.

    People who suffer from this disorder hate feeling depressed for obvious reasons. But some people enjoy and like feeling manic. It makes them feel alive with endless amounts of energy.

    Of course, I don't like feeling depressed. However, unlike some individuals with this disorder, I don't like feeling manic either. The reason is that when I'm manic, I know that I'm sick, and that it could get worse from there.

    Hence, I like being reasonably happy, happy in a healthy way instead.

  2. #2
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    I agree with you.

  3. #3
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    It could be just as easily said that most bi-polar sufferers are depressed due to the assumption of others. Just keep fleshing out a path that you know works for you. I've heard it suggested many times and have to agree from personal experience that depression in itself, it's own addiction. A facet that is not so obvious. The same way I cling to depression I also cling to behaviors. "Letting Go" is where it's at. The latter a cliche to be sure but none the less it's a view point that I find useful when I'm out of sync.

    I use the word behavior instead of disorder. That way I can ride my own waves as I see fit. It's much easier to own and or take responsibility when not feeling ashamed. I see each cycle as part of a larger one. Not all of us run at the same frequency and thank goodness for that! How boring that would be.

    Happy? What is Happy? Happy in a healthy way is an interesting mix of words:
    HMMMMMMMM ... For clinical cases that suffer a lot of fatigue resultant from long periods of episodes, bouts, cycles and whatnot ... something as simple as "stress reduction" can bring about a sense of happiness without the need for brightly colored facial expressions that we are so typically used to thinking of as true happiness. There is a lot of joy in less suffering - that always makes me happy.

    I accept my cycles and learn to live with them. Each cycle is part of a larger one, not always the episode we make them out to be - Nature is and yadda yadda and bla bla ... POINT is ... I just try to use what works and work on what does not. Looking inwards to gauge where I am at with less comparing of others also helps.

    So it is in this way - "You are only as deranged as you see yourself."

    I'm glad you see yourself as Healthy.

    It's a good way to be.
    Last edited by Ponder; 04-15-2017 at 04:37 PM.
    "...the cost of sanity in this society is a certain level of alienation" ~ Terrance McKenna → https://pondermovedhere.blogspot.com/

  4. #4
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    Mind over matter.

  5. #5
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    I agree with Kirk. I also don't like the manic phase, I usually end up feeling foolish about my behavior later, especially when I pass back into depression.

  6. #6
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    I have also come to accept my cycles. I am not medicated because I loathe the numbing side effect from the meds. To me, going around numb and not being able to feel anything is not living and I would rather teeter on the edge of mania.

  7. #7
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    This reminds me of a documentary I saw a while ago about Stephen Fry, the British comedian. It's pretty interesting and I see it's on YouTube:

    Part 1: https://youtu.be/_yT_F0dMZRU
    Part 2: https://youtu.be/p7tLn57pf-8
    "You're the worst thing that ever happened to me." --Marla Singer

  8. #8
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    glad to know there are others with BP who hate the manic phase, i am deeply tormented by my severely depressive phases but i really hate being manic with a passion,my head stops functioning its working so fast and i blow all my money on crap leaving myself in debt and i take on way to many things- i dread it,i was recently diagnosed with BP but i have had it since 10 years old [33 now] ,ive been misdiagnosed up till now-my shrink said most people like the manic phase and was surprised to hear me say i didnt,the manic phase doesnt make me more creative either.

  9. #9
    I agree one 100% with you friend

  10. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by MainerMikeBrown View Post
    I've been dealing with bi-polar disorder (manic depression) for many years. And I'm not the only one.

    People who suffer from this disorder hate feeling depressed for obvious reasons. But some people enjoy and like feeling manic. It makes them feel alive with endless amounts of energy.

    Of course, I don't like feeling depressed. However, unlike some individuals with this disorder, I don't like feeling manic either. The reason is that when I'm manic, I know that I'm sick, and that it could get worse from there.

    Hence, I like being reasonably happy, happy in a healthy way instead.
    Glad to know! Also agree with you.

 

 

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