Help me change

[p1234]

I have a lot of anxiety due to health conditions and its just the way I'm made. I've got IBS, gastric problems, menieres, arthritic neck problems and of course anxiety itself. I also have aspergers/hfa. Thats quite a mix The anxiety isn't just about health, my body just goes nuts at the slightest little thing even when I'm not even thinking anxious thoughts. Actually I think I've got rather good at not thinking about health issues and ignoring them, but that doesn't stop things like palpitations and wotnot.

I do a lot of sport and I run a business which is doing ok and has a handful of staff but sometimes I get massive anxiety attacks which end up leaving me suicidal with deep depression. During these times I'm completely non functional and unable to work, typically to 2 to 6 weeks at a time, perhaps once or twice per year. Its hard to describe what I do during those periods, its just like a black hole. This often happens when I stop sport, perhaps I need those hormones etc as my body has got so used to having them. I can accept that though and I'm looking out for the signs next time, although I'm sure it will get me just as much as ever.

But the crazy thing is that I'm best when I'm drinking lots of alcohol. Yes shoot me now for being evil but it really helps me live normally. I'd really like to stop that though and just somehow be that normal relaxed person who can smile through the day and enjoy everything thats going on. I'm not always an alcoholic but it just helps me through the bad patches, and the rest of the time I just drink sensible amounts. I know that if I just stop completely my body will go nuts so perhaps a taper is in order.

So what do I throw in the mix to achieve that ? I don't take any medication except PPIs and pain killers occasionally. I'm not really keen on medication.

One thing that would really help is if I could put some of the anxiety to bed. That would help me concentrate and work better so the business would improve.

Does anyone on here do specific relaxation exercises? I can't see me being a meditation kind of person but perhaps there's things like that which will help me become more rested and settled = less anxious.

So please put some tools in my tool box, all ideas very welcome, as well as things or resources that you found helpful This is a great forum and it helped me a lot a couple of years ago. thanks in advance.

[gypsylee]

Hi and welcome back

Well I'm not sure if "lots of alcohol" can help anyone live normally.. For a long time it helped me feel "normal" while I was drinking but my anxiety was through the roof when I wasn't drinking. So I'd wake up hungover, with massive anxiety, then just hang out until about 6pm when I could start drinking again. At my worst I'd wake up and have to have a drink and at times it would get to the point where alcohol wouldn't even stop the panic. I ended up in ICU for a week, knocked out on morphine with alcohol-induced pancreatitis. Since then I've pretty much stopped altogether and my anxiety is generally a lot better.

I do take meds, so I'm not 100% clean, but I really am so much better. I was off absolutely everything for three years but some nasty things happened and I'm still kind of recovering. If I drink now I end up suicidal, so I try to avoid it at all costs. Some of the non-chemical things that help me are:

-Talking to my GP and psychiatrist
-Talking to friends and family
-Posting on here
-Music
-Computer games (just those silly little Facebook ones)
-Reading books (fiction and occasionally self-help)
-Deep breathing and practicing mindfulness
-Going for drives (at night to avoid traffic!)
-Walking
-Looking after animals
-Gardening (mainly just watering my plants)

Hope that helps..
Gypsy x

[p1234]

Thanks for replying and sorry for being slow to respond.

I've already started cutting down the booze, so far so good. I don't want to quit completely but if I can just drink below recommended levels I think thats a great start. I'll try one smallish drink a day for the next week to let my body come down slowly.

So lots of chill time and relaxation. I used to do "autogenic" stuff but just lost interest. Life is very busy as I work very long hours. I don't think thats a cause but it possibly doesn't help. I suppose I'm already trying to fix that with some other life changes, but yes its useful to be reminded that the very obvious things can make a difference and yet are easily overlooked.. Often the anxiety beasties kick in when I'm chilling so I have to find strategies to address that.

I think just doing stuff thats different without setting any expectations (i.e. no DIY projects ) might help me too. And I am trying to spend less time online which will help.

Much appreciated.. thank you again

[fixmybrokenmind]

I have suffered from anxiety for most of my life. Last year I took a 2 month long trip to Mexico, I was meeting new people everyday and since I wasn't working my anxiety was pretty good. I started partying and drinking a lot and I felt pretty good until I went back home. Upon returning to work I was having panic attacks every day which had me to the point of suicide. It was the most awful time of my life. I remember almost everyday I would just break down in tears.

Another one of my friends never used to have anxiety. After 3-4 years of the party lifestyle he began to experience it badly, he didnt know how to handle it and eventually kept drinking to mask his anxiety. In the end his pancreas gave out and he ended up in the hospital unable to drink for the rest of his life. He is now on two anti anxiety medications because he kept pushing the limit.

Alcohol will temporarily boost your GABA and Dopamine and then upon lowering consumption these neurotransmitters will bottom out leaving you feeling depressed and extremely anxious. Everyone seems to know alcohol is bad for them but no one seems to know the science behind why.

Have you ever considered speaking with a therapist? Also for a good free resource I recommend ecouch to start. I have found following guided meditations, reading books, getting out in nature, exercising all to be great places to begin your fight back against anxiety.

Best wishes!

[p1234]

deleted

I chickened out

[gypsylee]

"Of all the drugs known to man, there is only one capable of raising five, sometimes six, of the eight neurotransmitters that shape the way we experience life. That drug is alcohol. We in the detoxification profession refer to it as the mother of all drugs or the kick-ass drug. The pharmaceutical industry has never produced a drug as all encompassing in its effect as alcohol.

Alcohol is the ultimate stimulant for the brain. To date, we know of no other agent that comes close to matching its power; alcohol’s effect on the human body is unprecedented. This influential drug is ultra-powerful as a neurotransmitter agonist. It moves the brain’s neurochemicals like no other drug on the planet. Alcohol raises serotonin, GABA, endocannabinoid, glutamate, and at high dose, increases the release of opiates. It also has a significant end-result effect on dopamine (which is very euphoric), adding up to a total of six neurotransmitters being affected. All this stimulation makes alcohol a powerful anti-depressant (not to mention highly addictive) and an even more powerful depressant once it wears off, causing neurotransmitters to plummet."

--Fredrick Von Steiff, Brain in Balance: Understanding the Genetics and Neurochemistry Behind Addiction and Sobriety

[Kirk]

Change can be tough and takes a lot of effort and can take some time to happen. I consider
myself a work in process doing the best that I can do and am always trying to make the
effort to be a better me.

[p1234]

Thank you. Yes thankfully I am able to stop the booze, I had a complete night off yesterday, I'll just have one beer tonight as I think its important to taper and not shock the body with a big bang too soon.

I'm also looking at diet, reducing processed food, controlling volume of food, avoiding junk, sugar etc. Again I'll ease in with that and not do a big bang change.

I can't say its working great as I always seems to get a gloomy headache when off booze but I expect my body will slowly adapt over a few weeks and then I'll stabilise things and see how the anxiety and other symptoms improve.

[fixmybrokenmind]

"Of all the drugs known to man, there is only one capable of raising five, sometimes six, of the eight neurotransmitters that shape the way we experience life. That drug is alcohol. We in the detoxification profession refer to it as the mother of all drugs or the kick-ass drug. The pharmaceutical industry has never produced a drug as all encompassing in its effect as alcohol.

Alcohol is the ultimate stimulant for the brain. To date, we know of no other agent that comes close to matching its power; alcohol’s effect on the human body is unprecedented. This influential drug is ultra-powerful as a neurotransmitter agonist. It moves the brain’s neurochemicals like no other drug on the planet. Alcohol raises serotonin, GABA, endocannabinoid, glutamate, and at high dose, increases the release of opiates. It also has a significant end-result effect on dopamine (which is very euphoric), adding up to a total of six neurotransmitters being affected. All this stimulation makes alcohol a powerful anti-depressant (not to mention highly addictive) and an even more powerful depressant once it wears off, causing neurotransmitters to plummet."

--Fredrick Von Steiff, Brain in Balance: Understanding the Genetics and Neurochemistry Behind Addiction and Sobriety

WOW eye opening to say the least

[gypsylee]

That book is really good. The author is a doctor who has worked in drug and alcohol detox for decades. It goes through all the neurotransmitters in a simple way and all the (main) drugs.

I really didn't post that in a preachy way, like "I'm so great, I don't drink, and you shouldn't either" lol. It's more because people have no idea how potent alcohol actually is. He also points out that nicotine affects the other couple of neurotransmitters that alcohol doesn't and comments on how the two legal drugs together impact the entire neurotransmitter system!

He does talk about methamphetamine being the hardest addiction to treat and the one that has the most long-term effects, so he isn't saying illicit drugs are better for you, just that the most socially accepted one happens to be the most all-encompassing. The scary thing is, a lot of young people use meth, weed AND alcohol (simply because alcohol is so easy to get). So there are going to be some pretty fried brains out there..