Jealous of people in relationships

[Kudzu2]

Why have you given up on it when you still wish to be in one? You will never find one without effort.

And on another note relationships bring just as many obstacles as being lonely does. It is never a walk in the park and you will have to put in effort to both be in a relationship and find one.

May I ask how old you are?

32. I'm average-looking at best and worst of all I'm very quiet. So I don't have a lot going for me.

[Kirk]

Being average looking at best and being very quiet is not a detriment at all, as many people are in the same boat as you.

[silver lining]

Kudzu2: You really want to know the secret in finding a relationship? "Stop looking", as soon as you cease all outward focus and switch to internal focus.. you will notice that someone will be dropped right in front of you. It's weird I know, but you can count on it to be true.

[Fashoom]

my recommendation is look for friends, not relationships. build your friendship circle. once you're friends with someone it just takes a shift in how the two of you think about your relationship to make it a romantic relationship. that can happen quickly or over a long period of time, but it happens all the time.

and i agree w/ kirk, being quiet and "average looking" aren't problems for lots of people. if you're open to meeting people and learning about who they are and what matters to them, that is all that matters.

[Kudzu2]

my recommendation is look for friends, not relationships. build your friendship circle. once you're friends with someone it just takes a shift in how the two of you think about your relationship to make it a romantic relationship. that can happen quickly or over a long period of time, but it happens all the time.

and i agree w/ kirk, being quiet and "average looking" aren't problems for lots of people. if you're open to meeting people and learning about who they are and what matters to them, that is all that matters.

I'm not very good at that either.

[Fashoom]

I'm not very good at that either.

You're doing it, right here right now. Making friends is the process of CONNECTING. Revealing something honest about yourself to another person, and being open to learning who they are, hearing what they are telling you about themselves. We all want people in our lives like that -- people who are real, who we can talk to honestly about our lives.

Take small steps. Try making an IRL mini-friend. No pressure. If you meet somebody somewhere, ask them something about themselves. What they're up to, why they're there. After listening to them, tell them something about you.

[Kudzu2]

So much easier said than done.

You're doing it, right here right now. Making friends is the process of CONNECTING. Revealing something honest about yourself to another person, and being open to learning who they are, hearing what they are telling you about themselves. We all want people in our lives like that -- people who are real, who we can talk to honestly about our lives.

Take small steps. Try making an IRL mini-friend. No pressure. If you meet somebody somewhere, ask them something about themselves. What they're up to, why they're there. After listening to them, tell them something about you.

[Kudzu2]

A friend of mine found a relationship online so I gave it a try and created a profile. After a few days there were still no hits. I deleted it.

[Malone]

Gypsylee.. I can never get enough of FotC's. Thanks for that😂🤣
Kudzu2.. you gotta get out there and get busy making a tit of yourself and get making mistakes.. you'll look back and regret it when you realise there's no secret formula. You just gotta be you but I'm guessing it would help if you started to like yourself a little bit more to realise that others can too.

Many people marry too soon or with little partner experience and never find themselves in your position of total freedom. I hope you learn to enjoy it because when you do, you'll immediately increase your chance of meeting someone.

Good luck!

[Kudzu2]

Gypsylee.. I can never get enough of FotC's. Thanks for that����
Kudzu2.. you gotta get out there and get busy making a tit of yourself and get making mistakes.. you'll look back and regret it when you realise there's no secret formula. You just gotta be you but I'm guessing it would help if you started to like yourself a little bit more to realise that others can too.

Many people marry too soon or with little partner experience and never find themselves in your position of total freedom. I hope you learn to enjoy it because when you do, you'll immediately increase your chance of meeting someone.

Good luck!

Being me is the problem. I'm not likeable. I try to change but it's not easy.