Advice: My Cousin's Graduation

[MarianaL]

Hi everyone,
I want to start off by saying I don't suffer from any of the things this forum is geared towards, but my question is concerning a cousin that I'm very close with.

She's in her mid 20s and going to graduate in December from university (B.S. in Chem, woo!). I go to the same university, so we're together a lot, and I'm one of the few people she can easily talk to (aside from family and her close friends). She suffers from anxiety and depression, both of which she's seeing a therapist for / receiving medication for (not sure which one, I generally don't ask). She recently let it slip that she doesn't want to attend her own graduation - she said she's afraid that everyone will look at her and because she's part of such a small major, extra attention will be on her during the ceremony.

I really feel like she'll be missing out if she doesn't attend the ceremony, but I can understand if she really thinks she can't go. My question is, should I convince her that it will be worth it, or should I stay on her side and tell her whatever she thinks is best is okay?

Thanks in advance.

[BlessedBackyard]

I lean toward telling to do her whatever she thinks is best. As an anxiety sufferer, I wouldn't want to feel pressured. But you could talk with her to discuss all aspects of her feelings, like if she thinks she'll regret not going or feel like she's missing out. If she says yes to either, then you can encourage her to attend or brainstorm strategies for making attendance easier.

[The Intolerable Kid]

She doesn't have to go, it's not the end of the world to skip it. You can try and remind her that it amounts to just a minute or two on stage. Most people will be looking at their phones rather than the graduates anyway.
I was heavily intoxicated for my own ceremony, so graduating didn't bother me at all.

[BlessedBackyard]

I skipped my own graduation, not because of anxiety but because they bore me so much. So I agree with Intolerable Kid...most people only pay attention to who they came to see and zone out the rest. Either way, I don't feel I missed anything by not going. But I a!so transferred schools my senior year of college, so I didn't graduate with my close friends.