Setbacks suck!

[Teafrenzy]

Yesterday was very good, I think my best overall days since my Trauma began. Only a little bit of disturbing thoughts and some light "buzzing" throughout the day.

Today I woke up a little anxious buti fine, spoke to a friend on Skype for about 2 hours. Went for a walk. Walking, I felt fine.

Everything was great until about 5pm..then BAM..a wave of panic and fear that made my head felt like it was on fire. I hadn't felt anything that intense for weeks. Not since my panic attacks stopped.

[Teafrenzy]

YAHOO! I felt great yesterday. I woke up today a little anxious. I had to take my mom to the hospital for a test. But I wasn't anxious over it. It started getting dark, I was feeling a bit panicky. I put on my anxiety hypnotic tape (I highly recommend it). Then suddenly, the anxiety broke, and I started to feel almost 100% like my old self again. Avoided this nightly stress that I was usually feeling and so far tonight (knock on wood) I feel wonderful. Only have a bit ear buzzing. But Not bad at all.

I think I have hit a new plateau.

[Teafrenzy]

Today I was walking and I tripped, stumbled a bit and hurt my toe.

Best injury of my life!

I realized the reason why I was walking funny. For the first time in 10 weeks I was NOT lightheaded.

[gypsylee]

Yeah but you're talking to yourself now on this forum LOL

[Teafrenzy]

That's my OCD

[gypsylee]

Hehehehe. I was totally joking.. Heaps of people do that (including myself). That's great about the lightheadedness

[Teafrenzy]

Feel about 90% there. Hoping for a full recovery by end of the month.

[gypsylee]

Awesome! And if not there's always this place to talk to yourself on :P

[Teafrenzy]

Going to talk to myself some more.

Today was particularly interesting.

Woke up with just a hint of morning anxiety. Not bad at all. Afternoon was amazing, barely felt anything. Maybe just a bit of pressure in my head and a tad of lightheadedness. This was my easiest transition from afternoon to dusk to evening in weeks. Only felt a bit of anxiety.

From 6pm onwards, perfection! In fact better than perfection..I felt kind of giddy. Just really happy and not even a bit of anxiety or head pressure. I felt really strange..I started to have anxiety because I wasn't feeling any anxiety! What was wrong with me? Am I taking too many supplements? Are they interacting and giving me brain damage? Why do I feel good?

It's 11pm, I just feel a bit of dull hissing in my ears and a tad of lightheadedness. Still, the best I have felt in months. I am quite grateful.

[Draydon]

Geez I can't count the number of setbacks I've had over the past 15 years. Unfortunately it's that many. When I saw one therapist he told me think of it like this. Your brain is like a computer. What we've done with our anxiety is created a short cut folder. Just like what you would see on your desktop. You feel a certain symptom or think a certain way and you end up clicking on the short cut which is the reaction that we experience (anxiety). What we need to work on is getting ride off that short cut (instant reaction) and replace it with a different folder which would be labelled "These are just uncomfortable feelings nothing more" By doing this you remove the power of anxiety because you are seeing it for truly what is. As you can see from this forum changing the way we think is extremely difficult and takes times. So when I get a hiccup I try to remind myself that that's all it is just a minor setback towards the long road to recovery