Thanks for reading my message. I am new to living with anxiety, or, at least the type of anxiety that seems crippling enough to affect multiple hours of the day. I am 31, male, live in Los Angeles and have a full time job with a 45 minute commute to and from work.
My anxiety first seemed to manifest itself in the car, and mostly in the mornings. It typically occurs at specific intersections (if anyone knows LA traffic, they know what a claustrophobic nightmare it can be), when I am stopped, and there are cars all around me. At first it wasn't a big deal - I would feel uncomfortable, feel myself tightening up, but would be able to avoid anything further happening. As the car started to move, my symptoms went away a bit. However, I have now had around 4 full blown panic attacks while driving (intense heart palpitations, feelings of unreality, eyes darting everywhere, tight chest). Luckily, I have limited the attacks to lasting around 30 seconds-1 minute at a time. You can imagine how this snowballs given the fact that not only am I worried about the panic, I am driving, so there is an additional worry. Now I feel I am unable to drive to work, and I don't know if the symptoms will manifest if I am a passenger, as well. The last few days I have gone to work late, and left early in order to avoid the bulk of the traffic, and I have had some discomfort, but nothing that I can't deal with. I also seem to be fine driving at night.
Further, over the past week the anxiety has now started to spill over to the hours before I get in the car, and the hours afterward. Sometimes, now, the anxiety - but not panic attacks, yet - sets in during random hours of the day (though after about 4:00, I feel perfectly fine, and just like the person I "used to be." I wonder if I am more anxious during the day, and in the mornings especially because I feel there are many things yet to do). I have been reading everything I can about this issue, which is a double edged sword, because it keeps my focus on the anxiety.
I'm looking for a way to stem the tide. I haven't dealt with this for a long time, so part of me wonders if I am freaked out over the suddenness of it all. It feels like I went from perfectly unanxious, to nearly agoraphobic in a matter of days (I know agoraphobia is crippling and this comment isn't meant to minimize it, just to communicate the difference in attitude in a matter of weeks). I am frankly scared, though I know in my rational mind I will overcome it, I am waiting for an epiphany, or a light bulb moment to switch things back to pre-anxiety. Not too much to ask, eh?