frustrated

[petrichor]

hello, i just really felt the need to get this thing off my chest...

i first started taking art lessons about a month ago and today happened to be one of the worst days of my life. i've moved to charcoal drawings, and the drawing i brought in for today's lesson was edited a little by my art teacher. my anxiety began to pick up when i embarrassed myself in front of my teacher. i felt like he thought i was lost and confused and stupid. when i began a sketch for my next charcoal drawing, that's when everything spiraled downhill. i had to make the sketch double its original, and i did take right measurements, but when it came to the head, i ended up making it way smaller. he stopped by my desk and i asked if what i had done so far was okay. he responded with a "no" and told me to get up. he then proceeded to do the top half of the woman i was sketching and i was just torn apart. i was standing there watching him, all the while this bubble of panic began to form in my chest. i wanted to cry. i work unbelievably slow when sketching, like i am not fast at all. today's lesson just made me feel like i had disappointed him so much. i feel like he despises me and thinks i'm stupid. sadly, i also feel like a failure, and this feeling is not new to me.

i just feel so discouraged, like i will never be able to be as good as my peers.

that is all, thank you.

[Anne1221]

That's not a good teacher if he makes you feel this way. You're way ahead of me in that you can even take an art class and do sketches. I can't even draw stick figures very well. You will be as good as your peers if you keep trying and don't give up and see the good that you do.

[Kirk]

I agree with Anne1221.

[The Intolerable Kid]

Sounds like a dickhead power-tripping type teacher. Exploring your artistic ability should consist of enjoyable self discovery, not conforming to someone else's rules and expectations. This person would have probably tried to stifle the creativity of Escher or Dali as well, giving them the stern "how dare you be different" lecture. Unless it's dull commercial or industrial "art" (doing tedious corporate artwork to make a living) there is no right or wrong to what you're doing. I suggest you sketch a giant, distorted middle finger for this person.

[petrichor]

first, thank you all for replying!

second, i don't think i can blame all this on my art teacher. see, he's literally harmless. but i have a tendency to overthink a lot and i worry about what other people think, so my anxiety probably made me feel like he was against me because i did some silly stuff! thinking about that day makes me cringe because i still overthink about it and just think about how stupid i must have looked. i've talked to my friends about it and they told me the same thing: you're overthinking it, he doesn't even care, and you should just relax and have fun. and they're right, to be quite honest! the thing is, i just don't have confidence in myself and rely too much on other people's judgements...