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  1. #1

    Unhappy Social Anxiety/Depression ?

    Hi everybody, I've posted a few times on here but something has recently been happening for probably the past month or two. I used to have social phobia (I still do), I don't like interacting with people I don't know, I can't keep a conversation, afraid of rejection, etc. But, I've been pushing myself to hangout with people little by little. Anyway, I have this best friend, let's call him K. K and I just have a blast hanging out whether it's watching movies, TV, driving around the city, etc. but lately he's been convincing swim to do drugs. Nothing hard-core, but swim tried mushrooms and molly, last night swim mixed 2mg Klonopin (RX not illegal or off streets), with 2 lines of molly and 3 beers. Swim felt great, was having a great time with his friend K. Swim drove home drunk last night, everything was fine, even though he knows he shouldn't have done it. But to the point, has anyone ever woken up after a great night (sober or not) and just felt so depressed and anxious? K is moving to FL in a few months and I'm going to miss my best friend so much, every time I think about it I want to just cry. Also, whenever K and I hangout, I wake up in the morning feeling so depressed and sad (we've usually been drinking the night before but I'm not sure if that has anything to do with it). I've also been getting really attached to people way too easily. Recently went through a break up of a 2 year relationship (3 months ago) so I'm not sure if that's also why.

    I've been self medicating with my Rx K-Pins (RX 1.5mg / day) (I'm taking 2mg / day) + nightly vape of weed + alcohol a night or two a week. I feel like my life is just going down the wrong path. I cut off all of my meds except K-Pin since I'm switching Dr.'s and the meds made me feel sick. Is there anyone else out there who has ever felt the same as far as waking up feeling depressed and anxious? I'm afraid for my future but I don't want to go back to sitting at home every night and losing my best friend. :cry:

  2. #2
    Quote Originally Posted by wilbanks951
    Hi everybody, I've posted a few times on here but something has recently been happening for probably the past month or two. I used to have social phobia (I still do), I don't like interacting with people I don't know, I can't keep a conversation, afraid of rejection, etc. But, I've been pushing myself to hangout with people little by little. Anyway, I have this best friend, let's call him K. K and I just have a blast hanging out whether it's watching movies, TV, driving around the city, etc. but lately he's been convincing swim to do drugs. Nothing hard-core, but swim tried mushrooms and molly, last night swim mixed 2mg Klonopin (RX not illegal or off streets), with 2 lines of molly and 3 beers. Swim felt great, was having a great time with his friend K. Swim drove home drunk last night, everything was fine, even though he knows he shouldn't have done it. But to the point, has anyone ever woken up after a great night (sober or not) and just felt so depressed and anxious? K is moving to FL in a few months and I'm going to miss my best friend so much, every time I think about it I want to just cry. Also, whenever K and I hangout, I wake up in the morning feeling so depressed and sad (we've usually been drinking the night before but I'm not sure if that has anything to do with it). I've also been getting really attached to people way too easily. Recently went through a break up of a 2 year relationship (3 months ago) so I'm not sure if that's also why.

    I've been self medicating with my Rx K-Pins (RX 1.5mg / day) (I'm taking 2mg / day) + nightly vape of weed + alcohol a night or two a week. I feel like my life is just going down the wrong path. I cut off all of my meds except K-Pin since I'm switching Dr.'s and the meds made me feel sick. Is there anyone else out there who has ever felt the same as far as waking up feeling depressed and anxious? I'm afraid for my future but I don't want to go back to sitting at home every night and losing my best friend. :cry:
    Mixing all that stuff is NOT good. Period.

    I will say this though... I don't drink often but when/if I do I notice that anxiety can be higher the following morning. I try to steer clear of it altogether. Plus, hangovers suck.

    I would definitely stop mixing those conconctions. Not good at all.

  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by alex42 View Post
    Mixing all that stuff is NOT good. Period.

    I will say this though... I don't drink often but when/if I do I notice that anxiety can be higher the following morning. I try to steer clear of it altogether. Plus, hangovers suck.

    I would definitely stop mixing those conconctions. Not good at all.
    Thank you for the reply, I'm going to class now, took 2.5mg klonopin and 4mg diclazepam (research chemical), I'm feeling pissed off that i missed two classes due to not waking up after my alarm. I'm honestly at the point where I take so many of the benzos that I think it'll just fix everything or at least not make me feel. So tired of feeling this way. I've also been getting really bad depression as it is coming back in full swing. Not really sure what to do about that as I basically dumped all of my meds because I don't take them and I'm switching Dr.s which isn't until march, ugh so tired.. I need help. somehow somewhere from someone....

  4. #4
    Senior Member
    Join Date
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    Location
    Melbourne, Australia
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    Quote Originally Posted by wilbanks951 View Post
    Hi everybody, I've posted a few times on here but something has recently been happening for probably the past month or two. I used to have social phobia (I still do), I don't like interacting with people I don't know, I can't keep a conversation, afraid of rejection, etc. But, I've been pushing myself to hangout with people little by little. Anyway, I have this best friend, let's call him K. K and I just have a blast hanging out whether it's watching movies, TV, driving around the city, etc. but lately he's been convincing swim to do drugs. Nothing hard-core, but swim tried mushrooms and molly, last night swim mixed 2mg Klonopin (RX not illegal or off streets), with 2 lines of molly and 3 beers. Swim felt great, was having a great time with his friend K. Swim drove home drunk last night, everything was fine, even though he knows he shouldn't have done it. But to the point, has anyone ever woken up after a great night (sober or not) and just felt so depressed and anxious? K is moving to FL in a few months and I'm going to miss my best friend so much, every time I think about it I want to just cry. Also, whenever K and I hangout, I wake up in the morning feeling so depressed and sad (we've usually been drinking the night before but I'm not sure if that has anything to do with it). I've also been getting really attached to people way too easily. Recently went through a break up of a 2 year relationship (3 months ago) so I'm not sure if that's also why.

    I've been self medicating with my Rx K-Pins (RX 1.5mg / day) (I'm taking 2mg / day) + nightly vape of weed + alcohol a night or two a week. I feel like my life is just going down the wrong path. I cut off all of my meds except K-Pin since I'm switching Dr.'s and the meds made me feel sick. Is there anyone else out there who has ever felt the same as far as waking up feeling depressed and anxious? I'm afraid for my future but I don't want to go back to sitting at home every night and losing my best friend. :cry:
    Alcohol will do it and benzos if you take them for a while. I don't like weed, so not much experience, but I think it makes people depressed.

    Cheers,
    Gypsy x
    Chaos isn't a pit. Chaos is a ladder. Many who try to climb it fail and never get to try again. The fall breaks them. And some, are given a chance to climb. They refuse, they cling to the realm or the gods or love. Illusions. Only the ladder is real. The climb is all there is. —Petyr “Littlefinger” Baelish, Game of Thrones

  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by gypsylee View Post
    Alcohol will do it and benzos if you take them for a while. I don't like weed, so not much experience, but I think it makes people depressed.

    Cheers,
    Gypsy x
    Well I mean I'm not drinking that much.. But with the benzos I think I've either built a tolerance from being on 2mg per day (Klonopin) or they seem to have no effect on me. They also take way too long to start working. Once I see my new psychiatrist, I'm going to ask to be switched to something that works more quickly such as Xanax which I was on before being switched to Klonopin. I know it's more addictive but it works hell of a lot better compared to how the Klonopin is working. Today I only took 1mg and I'm going to try to not take more. I just have really bad anxiety, I had coffee this morning and could feel the anxiety in my chest and couldn't help but taking the 1mg. How long does it take to build a tolerance and if you do have a tolerance, how long does it take to go away? I was off of Klonopin 2mg per day for 2 months so I don't see why the 1.5mg per day isn't working. I can take 4mg of this .5mg klonopin and I feel nothing (as far as anxiety relief or even sleepiness). I'm not really sure what to do from here... Hopefully anyone with experience can reply.
    Thanks
    CJ

  6. #6
    Senior Member
    Join Date
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    Location
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    3,335
    Quote Originally Posted by wilbanks951 View Post

    Well I mean I'm not drinking that much.. But with the benzos I think I've either built a tolerance from being on 2mg per day (Klonopin) or they seem to have no effect on me. They also take way too long to start working. Once I see my new psychiatrist, I'm going to ask to be switched to something that works more quickly such as Xanax which I was on before being switched to Klonopin. I know it's more addictive but it works hell of a lot better compared to how the Klonopin is working. Today I only took 1mg and I'm going to try to not take more. I just have really bad anxiety, I had coffee this morning and could feel the anxiety in my chest and couldn't help but taking the 1mg. How long does it take to build a tolerance and if you do have a tolerance, how long does it take to go away? I was off of Klonopin 2mg per day for 2 months so I don't see why the 1.5mg per day isn't working. I can take 4mg of this .5mg klonopin and I feel nothing (as far as anxiety relief or even sleepiness). I'm not really sure what to do from here... Hopefully anyone with experience can reply.
    Thanks
    CJ
    Yeah the thing is, it's not just the tolerance that causes anxiety with benzos I don't think. I was on and off Valium for many years and I found that after a while they just made me worse. I mean it could be the tolerance I suppose but even when they seemed to be working I'd be worse the next day. It's hard to say because I had a huge alcohol problem as well.

    I still have a tolerance to benzos and I've been off them for about 4 years (apart from the occasional few here and there). It doesn't take long at all to build a tolerance and I don't know how long it takes to go away. It probably depends on the person.

    Xanax I'd stay away from. That stuff has the WORST withdrawal symptoms - I found I'd get withdrawal within the same day! I was never on Klonopin but I think that's also stronger than Valium.

    I'm generally more relaxed now with no alcohol and no benzos. I'm on Lexapro 20mg a day and I'm also taking Lyrica for pain but I find it helps me get a good sleep.

    I'd talk to the psychiatrist about the whole situation with benzos and maybe try and find a medication that helps in the long-term. Because the benzo story never ends well.

    All the best
    Gypsy x
    Chaos isn't a pit. Chaos is a ladder. Many who try to climb it fail and never get to try again. The fall breaks them. And some, are given a chance to climb. They refuse, they cling to the realm or the gods or love. Illusions. Only the ladder is real. The climb is all there is. —Petyr “Littlefinger” Baelish, Game of Thrones

 

 

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