Relationship Anxiety

[scooter]

Hello I'm posting here because I need some advice and I'm not really sure where to turn. I've been having extreme anxiety towards my relationship with my boyfriend and I'm not really sure why. Nothing is going wrong in our relationship (except for my constant need to worry), he's a great guy and I love him very much. I constantly find myself worrying that we will one day breakup and I will be left without him. The thoughts result in a rapid heart beat, panic attacks, and sometimes excessive crying. I feel so neurotic. The strange thing is that I worry I will be the one who ends the relationship. I feel like I have the power to mess everything up and that scares me. I've talked to him about my feelings, and he's totally supportive and understanding, but I feel the need to come on a forum like this where other people with anxiety may be able to help me out and give me some advice. I constantly have intrusive anxious thoughts all day and it's really starting to get to me. I really just want my anxiety to go away but I don't know how. I don't want the solution to my excessive worries about losing my boyfriend to be breaking up. I love him so much and I don't want this to impact our relationship. Has anyone else ever experienced anything like this?
Just to clarify, this is not the only thing I have anxiety about. I have been diagnosed with generalized anxiety and social anxiety, for which I am currently taking medication. I tend to worry about every little day matters along with social situations, but this worry about my relationship is just being blown out of proportion.

[Nathan95]

I totally understand how you feel. I have a perfect girlfriend and a solid relationship yet I'm constantly worrying about her in a separate college and lately it's been driving me crazy.

It's okay to feel this way. Those of us with anxiety tend to ponder a lot on the negatives and on worse case scenarios when it comes to relationships, even if nothing is going wrong (especially if nothing is going wrong, because we have more to lose).

Well to be honest, a million things can go wrong in a relationship or in your life in general. We live in constant uncertainty and I think it's best to come to terms with that and focus on the present moment. Something I read in a book that I found insightful is you should ask yourself, "What problem do I have right this very moment?" Not next week, not tomorrow, not in 10 seconds. Now. Unless you're in pain, the answer is probably going to be nothing. All our problems are concerned with the future. So, what problem do you have right now in your relationship with your boyfriend? From reading your post, it seems like you have no problem in the present moment, and the present moment is all that exists. Anything can happen in the future and most of it we have no control over, which might be scary, but it can also be very liberating. All that you can do is be good to your man and enjoy the present moment with him, because that's all that exists. I hope this helps at least a little.