Social anxiety.

[Decodie]

I've suffered from anxiety for almost 3-4 years now and i'm currently aged 21...i've somehow managed to deal with it in the past by avoiding any uncomfortable situations but this means having a restricted social life and only a small amount of friends. I've recently met someone who is really understanding of my situation (unlike any of my past partners who quite frankly made it worse) and I really wanna change, not only for him but for myself. This feeling I get is indescribable and as soon as it starts I stand no chance of getting rid of it until i'm back home and feeling safe/secure. It's controlling me and making me feel extremely depressed and quite frankly useless. Even small things like going out for a meal or round to someones house who is having a small gathering is impossible. The minute any sort attention is on me and I have someone asking me a direct question or just being polite and starting up a conversation I feel this sense of dread and panic, I have an issue with thinking people are looking at me all the time which I know sounds silly. Hell, it is silly! I just can't help the way I am and I really don't know what I can do anymore, I refuse to take any sort of medication as I tried doing so in the past and it made me feel numb. I've joined this site to hopefully seek advice of some natural remedies, it also makes me feel better knowing i'm not alone. I wish I could go into the real extent of what I suffer and feel but we'd be here all night so i'll leave it at this for now.