What do you think about this Girl?

[Kyle Morgan]

Hey, Kyle. I was in a similarish situation to yours a few years ago, but thankfully I didn't have to see this girl once it went downhill. Even then it was still hard to let go because she would still contact me. Hell, she still sends me a Facebook message every few months to this day. Sometimes I politely respond, but usually ignoring it is much easier since I have little interest in talking to her.

To put it simply, you are making excuses for her. You state multiple times in this thread how two-faced she is, yet here you try to say she is straight forward and honest, and she is anything but. This isn't going to have a happy ending like you want it to have if you keep initiating contact. She isn't suddenly going to become a different person. You have this idealized version of what you want her to be in your head, and it's making you ignore all her faults, which you are aware of, yet still trying to rationalize them. You seem to be seeking validation here for a decision you have already made.

Cut off all contact with her apart from the occasional hello when you see her at home or in school. If that is too hard, don't say anything. Pretend she doesn't exist. Delete her number. You don't need it, and it will only lead to making a mistake (drunk texting is so bad in the type of relationship you have :P). If there is dire need to get in contact with her, she lives next door.

It sounds like she was genuinely interested in being your friend at first, especially since you were someone she could share her problems with. Or she just wanted the attention, and you were more than willing to provide it. She got bored of that though, and now there is no going back. Your relationship will never be the same again, even if you would somehow become friends again, because of all this baggage you guys have. At the risk of sounding like a jerk, a romantic relationship will never happen between you two at this point, so get it out of your head.

I do understand how you feel, and I had friends give me the same advice when it happened to me, but I ignored it and kept making excuses. What I wrote may seem harsh, and I apologize if you take offense to it, but sugar coating it is not going to help you. Do yourself a favor and skip all the needless pain further contact with her will bring. It's not going to be easy at first, but it really does get easier after a while. You just have to be willing to let her go, which unfortunately you are not.

In any case, I wish you the best of luck.

P.S. - I'm new here. First post. Hi everyone!

Totally agree with you man, Hi by the way. After today I feel like such a idiot haha

[Pierogies99]

Totally agree with you man, Hi by the way. After today I feel like such a idiot haha

I wouldn't worry about it. Letting go is hard for most people, so not knowing what to do is perfectly normal. Once it happens a few times, you start to get a grasp on what to expect, and how to handle it. Besides, it's almost impossible to objectively look at something like this if you are involved.

Feel free to PM if you have more questions or whatever. I'm by no means an expert on relationships, but I can at least tell you what not to do.

[Kyle Morgan]

I wouldn't worry about it. Letting go is hard for most people, so not knowing what to do is perfectly normal. Once it happens a few times, you start to get a grasp on what to expect, and how to handle it. Besides, it's almost impossible to objectively look at something like this if you are involved.

Feel free to PM if you have more questions or whatever. I'm by no means an expert on relationships, but I can at least tell you what not to do.

Thanks dude, I seen her today in my College and I just felt pathetic, I seen her going into the College entrance with two random guys, and as soon as she seen me she started to grab both of the guy's arms and tried holding their hands. she was whispering to them both and I caught her smirking at me from her corner of her eye. I said hi politely and smiled and she just giggled, barely looked at me and just muttered under her breath, and she seemed like she was walking where ever I was walking for 5 minutes. I think she's trying to antagonise me.I just found it weird because before she seen me she weren't even holding the two guy's hands lol.

[Pierogies99]

Thanks dude, I seen her today in my College and I just felt pathetic, I seen her going into the College entrance with two random guys, and as soon as she seen me she started to grab both of the guy's arms and tried holding their hands. she was whispering to them both and I caught her smirking at me from her corner of her eye. I said hi politely and smiled and she just giggled, barely looked at me and just muttered under her breath, and she seemed like she was walking where ever I was walking for 5 minutes. I think she's trying to antagonise me.I just found it weird because before she seen me she weren't even holding the two guy's hands lol.

She's just playing games. My advice is to completely ignore her at this point. Don't even look her way. This will piss her off more than anything you could say. If for some reason she wants to talk to you, just tell her you are in a hurry and walk away. Don't look like you are trying to run away though; just casually walk away like she isn't even there. DO NOT, at any point, say sorry or apologize if you do happen to talk to her. I cannot stress this enough. If you somehow get stuck talking to her, keep checking your phone/watch and look impatient. Look her in the eyes. I struggle with this a lot because it is so uncomfortable, but looking away first is a sign of weakness and you lose any advantage you may have had. It's a good confidence booster once you can do this effortlessly, so getting in the habit of doing it is a good idea in general.

To be honest, I doubt any of this will be necessary if you just ignore her, but it's good to be prepared! Gotta practice before you play the game. You aren't Allen Iverson. I really hope someone gets that reference.

[Kyle Morgan]

She's just playing games. My advice is to completely ignore her at this point. Don't even look her way. This will piss her off more than anything you could say. If for some reason she wants to talk to you, just tell her you are in a hurry and walk away. Don't look like you are trying to run away though; just casually walk away like she isn't even there. DO NOT, at any point, say sorry or apologize if you do happen to talk to her. I cannot stress this enough. If you somehow get stuck talking to her, keep checking your phone/watch and look impatient. Look her in the eyes. I struggle with this a lot because it is so uncomfortable, but looking away first is a sign of weakness and you lose any advantage you may have had. It's a good confidence booster once you can do this effortlessly, so getting in the habit of doing it is a good idea in general.

To be honest, I doubt any of this will be necessary if you just ignore her, but it's good to be prepared! Gotta practice before you play the game. You aren't Allen Iverson. I really hope someone gets that reference.

Thanks man, I agree with what you're saying, I have to make sure I'm not too rude because she likes to stir up trouble, and if I say something that slightly offends her, she will tell her mother, and her mother will probably have a go at me and my mother.

[Angie 91]

Hi.

Love, horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable.

I think that people should do whatever the Hell they want to.
It is that simple and that messed up.
You have not been put on this Earth to judge her or anyone else, neither have I.
Maybe she is a free-spirit and reckless, maybe she has got some issues, it's her life.

Fact is: We are always us and we are always changing.
Take what you have learned and move on. I'm very sorry you feel this way.

You might wanna stay away from her, - that would be my advice but, not because she is a bad or good person; but because she makes you feel like you do.

Best,

Angie

[jessed03]

Oh, Angie, hi

Love can indeed, suck.